Being Right or Being Kind

Real Estate Agent with John L Scott Market Center 700512026

Recently, the movie Wonder came out. In short, it's a story about a disfigured boy named August, Auggie, who rises above bullying at school and teaches some valuable lessons to everyone around him about forgiveness, kindness, and what really matters as a human.

In a review on NPR, there was a snippet from a short scene in the movie. Auggie's teacher has daily precepts (a commandment or direction given as a rule of action or conduct) that he has a child read daily to the other kids in the classroom. This day, a young girl read,

                         "When given the choice to be right or be kind,

                                                       choose kind." 


That one sentence, that one simple precept has played over and over again in my mind and heart. It pops up in so many circumstances and plays a daily role in how to treat each other in business and personal relationships.


By being kind, you aren't forcing your ego on another, but instead are accepting the other, good or bad and connecting with that person on a deeper level. 


Think about that the next time you are working with buyers and sellers in real estate. Think about that the next time you want to say, "I told you so" to your spouse, your child, your friend. Sometimes, it's best to think about how to reword your response into one filled with kindness.




Comments (42)

Emily Medvec
eXp Realty LLC - Santa Fe, NM
Realtor | Serving Santa Fe & Northern NM

Dear Gayle, thank you for connecting our business to kindness. Kathy Streib reminded me to read your blog this morning in her share of lightbulb moments. Your blog touched on more than kindness. It was a powerful reminder we always have a choice how to be in whatever we are doing. And in our business, it is best to begin with kindness. Thank you Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate 

Jan 28, 2018 05:16 AM
Dorie Dillard Austin TX
Coldwell Banker Realty ~ 512.750.6899 - Austin, TX
NW Austin ~ Canyon Creek and Spicewood/Balcones

Good morning Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate ,

So glad to see Kathy Streib feature you post in her "Ah-Ha" moments for the week..I read and commented before but its such a good post worth reading again.

Jan 28, 2018 05:39 AM
Chris Lima
Turtle Reef Realty - Port St Lucie, FL
Local or Global-Allow me to open doors for you.

Great post and a very good reminder that being kind is a choice.

Jan 28, 2018 07:06 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Hi Gayle

So glad Kathy shared this wonderful post, but why oh why is it not featured so more can read it? I haven't seen the movie but have seen the trailer. In this day and age the lesson about being kind needs to be heard by all, and taken to heart. Far too many want or need to be right at all costs, but ignore the value of being kind.


Jan 28, 2018 08:47 AM
Tim Maitski
Atlanta Communities Real Estate Brokerage - Atlanta, GA
Truth, Excellence and a Good Deal

It's funny.  This is one thing I've resolved to work on this year.  It goes along with another idea that I just read in a book.  Don't try to correct and convince.  It never works.  Thanks for the reminder.

Jan 28, 2018 08:58 AM
Marte Cliff
Marte Cliff Copywriting - Priest River, ID
Your real estate writer

This reminds me of Wayne Dwyer's advice to live peacefully and avoid conflict by simply saying "You're right about that."

Jan 28, 2018 11:24 AM
Rebecca Gaujot, Realtor®
Lewisburg, WV
Lewisburg WV, the go to agent for all real estate

Choosing kindess over ego is the way to go for me, Gayle. And, I really want to see this movie when it comes here.

Jan 28, 2018 11:44 AM
Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-755-2905

I'm away for a girl's weekend but thank you to Kathy Streib for allowing this to be seen by others!!

Jan 28, 2018 12:53 PM
Tammy Lankford,
Lane Realty Eatonton, GA Lake Sinclair, Milledgeville, 706-485-9668 - Eatonton, GA
Broker GA Lake Sinclair/Eatonton/Milledgeville

Thank you.  Last week was a struggle.  And I know I need to apologize for some not kind things even though I think I was right.  

I loved this movie.

Jan 28, 2018 01:00 PM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Gayle - I hope people take a lesson from this because being kind is more important to making a connection and theen making a sale.

Jan 28, 2018 01:32 PM
Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-755-2905

Sheila Anderson you are SO right. And showing kindness with no agenda is the best "kind"! 

Emily Medvec Santa Fe NM we are always given the choice. A difficult one at times when we are hurt or angry, but taking a deep breath and looking for that golden moment to be kind instead is enlightening and freeing! 

I just love you, Dorie Dillard thank you (again) for re-reading and taking the time to comment. You are so remarkable!


Jan 28, 2018 06:26 PM
Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-755-2905

Chris Lima, we can never be reminded enough, wouldn't you say?

Jeff Dowler how you put your perspective into words was very eloquent. I am grateful for all of those who have read this and to Kathy Streib as well. She surprised me! 

Tim Maitski I would love to know what book you read. Good for you! I have many things to work on this wonderful year of 2018!

Marte Cliff Wayne Dyer is part of my world every week! I do meditations from his "Wish Fulfillment" meditation CD. I love that, thank you. 


Jan 28, 2018 07:24 PM
Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-755-2905

Oh Rebecca Gaujot it is a remarkable film and has stayed with me. Bring tissues!

Tammy Lankford, I hope you find the right moments to do just that. A great release it will be. So very glad that you saw this movie! 

Grant Schneider being kind can cross all barriers. 


Jan 28, 2018 07:26 PM
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667,, Broker/REALTOR® - Kalispell, MT
Helping your Montana dreams take root

I totally agree with choosing kindness...  I hadn't heard of this movie but just watched the trailer and teared up. I'm putting this on my to-watch list.

Jan 29, 2018 03:15 AM
Corey Martin
Martin Presence Group - Ruston, LA
Real Estate and Management Solutions

I have been wanting to watch that movie. Now you have given me one more reason to see it as soon as possible. Thank you for sharing. 

Jan 29, 2018 05:01 PM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

I have the philosophy of: no matter what another person says or does I will be kind.

That thinking has carried me a long way in life.

Thanks for sharing a great thought.

Jan 30, 2018 07:16 AM
Pat Starnes-Front Gate Realty
Front Gate Real Estate - Brandon, MS
601-991-2900 Office; 601-278-4513 Cell

Always a good reminder to show grace.

Jan 30, 2018 08:14 AM
Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-755-2905

Kat Palmiotti and Corey Martin this movie has really stayed with me for so many reasons. I am reading a book right now called "Nonviolent Communication" A Language of Life and one chapter deals with anger and empathy and what people really need when they are showing anger. It's just another flavor of how to be kind. I do hope you both see it!

John Wiley I have been a proponent of this for years and you have such a great approach to life that HAS served you and others--I'll bet you are an inspiration!

Pat Starnes, Brandon, MS I love that word....grace. Yes, it's good to keep that uppermost in our minds and hearts. 


Jan 30, 2018 08:54 AM
Corey Martin

That sounds like an interesting book. Thank you for telling me about it. 

Jan 30, 2018 01:50 PM
Debe Maxwell, CRS | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
The right Charlotte REALTOR!

Out of the mouths of babes, Gayle! Such a touching trailer - I have tears running down my face. Being right is not all that those who believe it to be the end-all, be-all is! I'd much rather take the high road...we never regret doing so.

Jan 30, 2018 09:31 AM
Ron Barnes
Associate Broker at Berkshire Hathaway Home Services Georgia Properties - Jasper, GA
"Most agents claim they're #1 - I THINK YOU'RE #1!

The older we get the easier it is not to care so much about being right.

Feb 24, 2018 08:04 AM