Enough Said! Give up Your ABC Gum...

Real Estate Broker/Owner with Phoenix Property Shoppe AZ Broker BR030809000


Have you ever had one of those days when someone just can't stop themselves from rehashing negative stuff blah blah blah?


 I ran into a friend at a meeting that I have known for a couple of years. He's always seemed pretty cool, calm and collected at other meetings -  but whoa - talk about MR. Negative to a capital N today. I observed the scene for a bit and wondered what was going on with this guy as it seemed out of place. I let it go because I don't know him all that well on a personal level and maybe he's just having one of those days? Not so fast...


He caught me on the way out of the place and asked if I had a few minutes to talk with him.  Well, Ok I said let's go outside (honestly I wasn't too sure I wanted to get caught up in his story).


We sat on the steps and I gave him a long look - and said - so what's up with you today?  Holy smokes he went on and on about some client that screwed 'him' over last month and he was expecting to see that client at the meeting but he didn't show up - blah blah blah.  Hmmm?  So let me get this straight, you are still mad that a business deal went south a month ago? Yes damn mad he said. Well what do you want to do about it?  NOTHING he says! Ok....well I guess that's that then. He didn't like that answer much by the look on his face.


I asked him another question. So who is this affecting you or the other guy as you seem to be carrying around a load of negative BS? And I'm betting it's held you back from attracting other clients, or maybe it hasn't?  So then he says to me - CRAP why do you always have to be so damn annoying. And then he started laughing.  I just smiled at him and said.....well sorry about that but you asked me for my 2 cents and you know I deliver when asked.


I told him about a mentor of mine that taught me years ago to stop chewing ABC gum over and over and over. Who does that help? Nobody except you!


He liked that analogy and said,  well your mentor was right. I screwed myself over and over and just kept chewing the damn gum.  I'm done with that!



Enough Said! Give up Your ABC Gum...



Posted by
Phoenix Property Shoppe  



Anna "Banana" Kruchten
Designated Broker & Owner

Phoenix Homes For Sale


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Marte Cliff
Marte Cliff Copywriting - Priest River, ID
your real estate writer

Your mentor was wise, and so is Abraham. I bite my tongue a LOT, knowing what I know about law of attraction. Some people aren't going to hear it, so I just shut up and ignore their grousing.

Feb 09, 2018 07:35 PM #29
Hannah Williams
Re/Max Eastern inc. - Philadelphia, PA
Expertise NE Philadelphia & Bucks 215-953-8818

Good stuff Anna Banana Kruchten CRS,CRB  I was talking to an agent in another office of ours about this and we smiled and said KARMA  but ABC gum is good  

You are Featured in Bananatude


Feb 09, 2018 08:49 PM #30
Jeff Dowler, CRS
Solutions Real Estate - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude - Carlsbad

Hi Anna

I bet, deep down, this guy appreciated your honesty and being straight with him.

ABC gum is a great analogy. There’s a time to spit it out and move on


Feb 09, 2018 09:40 PM #31
Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

Anna, I have never heard the terminology "ABC Gum" never the less I try to stay away from people like that as far as I can:)Endre

Feb 09, 2018 11:50 PM #32
Bill & Cyndi Daves
Hiawassee, Young Harris, Blairsville, Hayesville, Murphy and Beyond! - Hiawassee, GA
TeamDAVES - Your REALTORS In the GA/NC Mountains!

Anna thats a great analogy. Its stale, harder to chew and has no flavor. Spit it out and make room for "gum" that's fresh and appealing!

Feb 10, 2018 06:27 AM #33
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

Awesome advice! Glad he was able to take it and see the light. Anna to the rescue!

Feb 10, 2018 08:53 AM #34
Dörte Engel
RE/MAX Leading Edge - Bowie, MD
ABC - Annapolis, Bowie, Crofton & rest of Maryland

Dear Anna,

So nice of you to reach out to "grouchy Greg" to change his perspective. All of us occasionally need a reality check. You are a true friend.

Feb 10, 2018 11:15 AM #35
Jan Green
Value Added Service, 602-620-2699 - Scottsdale, AZ
HomeSmart Elite Group, REALTOR®, EcoBroker, GREEN

anna, you were the perfect person to cross his path that day.  Sometimes we all need a bit of honesty to get over what's getting into us!  Great post! 

Feb 10, 2018 12:14 PM #36
Paul McFadden
Paratex - Seattle, WA
Pest Control, Seattle, WA.

Indeed! Not getting over things never works. Thanks!

Feb 10, 2018 01:09 PM #37
John Wiley
Right Move Real Estate Group- EXP Realty - Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL Real Estate GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

I watch a golf match occasionally. Almost every golfer makes a really bad shot.

At that point they have a choice to either stew and fume over that shot for the rest of the match and ultimately lose any chance to win, or, they can put that bad shot out of their mind and focus on making the next shot a great one.

I love your story and thanks for sharing.

Feb 10, 2018 01:19 PM #38
Corey Martin
Martin Presence Group - Ruston, LA
Real Estate and Management Solutions

What a great point. Stop chewing on the negativity. Start breeding positivity and breaking out of old, useless habits. Thank you for sharing!

Feb 10, 2018 05:04 PM #39
Debra Leisek
Bay Realty,Inc Homer Alaska - Homer, AK

So easy to get caught up in the negative and not move on to the positive!  this is a very good reminder to spit out the ABC and let it go..... NICE!

Feb 10, 2018 11:50 PM #40
Emily Medvec Qualifying Broker
Hello Realty Partners - Santa Fe, NM
Realtor | Serving Santa Fe & Northern NM

There is a gift in every adversity. He was fortunate to meet you and receive your wise advice. We are fortunate for the reminder and your story that chewing ABC gum can rotten more than teeth! Thank you Anna Banana Kruchten CRS,CRB 

Feb 11, 2018 04:31 AM #41
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 www.LizTour.com - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

Someone told Liz some years back that when something goes wrong you have two minutes and two seconds to be upset, then you need to get over it and move on.  We're in a business that runs the risk of getting screwed over and I could focus on the 1-2 deals that I got screwed over, or the 20 clients that appreciate the help and helped us feed our private zoo :)

Feb 11, 2018 05:18 AM #42
Brenda Swigert
ERA Real Solutions - West Chester, OH

I love the ABC gum! There are sensitive folks that can’t let go of things and as one of those people I can tell you it drives me nuts. I love this thought of already been chewed. I also really like what Liz mentioned above about 2 minutes and 2 seconds to be upset and then move on. 

What I have learned is that you may not understand everything, because it may not be any of your business or you may only be privy to a small portion of the big picture. However being able to brush yourself off and keep moving forward is the best you can do all the way around. 

Thanks for the advice!

Brenda Swiger

Feb 12, 2018 06:27 AM #43
John Dotson
Preferred Properties of Highlands, Inc. - Highlands, NC - Highlands, NC
The experience to get you to the other side!

Sometimes it is best just to get on with life.  Concentrating on the negative things in life has this wonderful tendency to drag us all the way to the bottom.

Feb 12, 2018 01:30 PM #44
Beth Atalay
Cam Realty and Property Management - Clermont, FL
Cam Realty of Clermont FL

Hi Anna Banana Kruchten CRS,CRB, life is too short and precious to waste time on this kind of stuff. Yes, bad stuff happens, move on.. loved this post! 

Feb 13, 2018 02:27 PM #51
Margaret Rome, Baltimore Maryland
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

He got it when he began laughing  after you stated...

"why do you always have to be so damn annoying."


Feb 13, 2018 06:31 PM #52
Pat Starnes, Brandon, MS
Front Gate Real Estate - Brandon, MS
Broker Associate, ABR, 601-278-4513

Not at all what I expected from the title! But Anna, sometimes we just HAVE to vent. My pressure relief valve blew up yesterday and I had to relieve some stress. Thank goodness for chocolate (in the form of martinis).  I had a great dish session with a good friend and at the end of the evening, all the worlds problems went away. :)

Feb 14, 2018 06:57 PM #53
Lynnea Miller
Bend Premier Real Estate - Bend, OR
Premier Real Estate Service in Central Oregon

Got to let go of the negative and focus on the positive. And do allow that someone may just be having a bad day - but a bad month?  That person needs to do as you say, Anna Banana Kruchten CRS,CRB!

Feb 16, 2018 04:30 PM #54
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