What are You Avoiding?

Education & Training with The Lones Group, Inc.

The Lones Group, Inc.

What are You Avoiding?

Do you ever get that feeling in the pit of your stomach when you think about that certain thing that you have been putting off? That thing you know you should do and would make you feel better to just get it off your plate? But the thought of tackling it is so overwhelming that you just push it back to the recesses of your mind and hope to forget about it?

If your thoughts went immediately to that thing, or things, that are weighing heavily on your mind, I am talking to you.

  • Maybe it's avoiding a hard conversation with a client…
  • Maybe it's reaching out to a past client who gave you a referral, but you haven't yet taken the time to thank them..
  • Or maybe it's avoiding going to that doctor appointment for your annual checkup!

I find that whatever that thing is that you are avoiding, it is usually that one thing that ends up having a big impact on your business or your life.

Ask any agent who has ever avoided having a price reduction conversation with a seller how good they felt when they finally made a plan for that conversation and addressed it.

What about that cluttered office or closet that you finally cleaned? Didn't that made you feel like you had tackled the world and were ready to get back to work?

The problem with avoiding the things you don't want to tackle is that they are holding you back. We avoid what we don't naturally love doing. In fact, we make a million excuses as to why we need to be doing something else. But there are things in your real estate business that you either have to figure out a way to do or you need to pay to get them done because a strong thriving real estate business has to have a balance. And the negative energy that is generated by having things you are avoiding will weigh you down.

And if is health issues you are avoiding, STOP. This is your wake-up call to listen to the voice in your head and deal with it TODAY. Call your doctor right now and make that appointment.

A great way to deal with the things you are avoiding is to make a list. Title it THE TOP 10 THINGS I AM AVOIDING. Take ten minutes and write down those things you are avoiding.

When you claim the fact that you are avoiding these things something very powerful happens. Instead of taking up more space and energy in your brain, you have taken away its power by containing it on a sheet of paper. You naturally want to work on eliminating some of the items.  Start with the easy ones and before you know it you will find that working on that list isn't nearly as hard as your mind had made it out to be.

When you avoid something, it is simply your mind's way of telling you that it is uncomfortable for you.  Getting uncomfortable is one of the many secrets of the successful agents.  My real estate mentor once told me many years ago that I could become rich in this business if I was willing to do the things that other agents found uncomfortable.  That is when I became obsessed with geographical farming and working expired and cancelled listings.  He was right, I tackled something that other agents found uncomfortable until I got comfortable and successful at it. And I didn't avoid lead generation after that.

Take some time to make a list of what you are avoiding and get power over those things today!


By Denise Lones CSP, M.I.R.M., CDEI - The founding partner of The Lones Group, Denise Lones, brings nearly three decades of experience in the real estate industry. With agent/broker coaching, expertise in branding, lead generation, strategic marketing, business analysis, new home project planning, product development, Denise is nationally recognized as the source for all things real estate. With a passion for improvement, Denise has helped thousands of real estate agents, brokers, and managers build their business to unprecedented levels of success, while helping them maintain balance and quality of life.

The Lones Group, Inc.

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William Feela
Realtor, Whispering Pines Realty 651-674-5999 No.

I avoid very few issues and it makes life much easier in the long ru

Feb 12, 2018 01:54 PM #1
Marte Cliff
Marte Cliff Copywriting - Priest River, ID
your real estate writer

Good advice - if there's something you know you should do it hangs over your head like a dark cloud until you finally do it.

And then there are the little things you just don't enjoy. For me, for instance, it might be folding the laundry. It takes so few minutes that it isn't worth thinking about, but when I don't want to do it, it sure is easy to put off. (Then my husband heads for the shower asking "Do I have any clean t-shirts?" so I get busy.)

Feb 12, 2018 03:09 PM #2
Dorie Dillard
Coldwell Banker United Realtors® ~ 512.346.1799 - Austin, TX
Serving Buyers & Sellers in NW Austin Real Estate

Good evening Denise Lones ,

Love the advice. I try to put the tough things on my list first..get them out of the way and then I don't have to be concerned with it!


Feb 12, 2018 05:13 PM #3
Carol Williams
U.S.: I specialize in helping agents who have been in the business 2 years or less create a thriving business. - Wenatchee, WA
"Customized Mentoring & Marketing Services"

Sometimes I think avoiding things takes up more mental energy than actually doing them.  So why do we do it???

Feb 12, 2018 07:45 PM #4
Dörte Engel
RE/MAX Leading Edge - Bowie, MD
ABC - Annapolis, Bowie, Crofton & rest of Maryland

Dear Denise,

Better call the doctor then, I suppose.

Feb 13, 2018 07:10 PM #5
Anna Hatridge
Goodson Realty - Farmington, MO
Missouri Realtor with Goodson Realty

nice reminder to take care of what needs to be taken care  right away

Feb 14, 2018 02:37 AM #6
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

Avoiding it allows it to consume you. Do it and get it behind you asap. Great post!

Feb 14, 2018 04:13 AM #7
Nancy Manby
William Raveis Real Estate - Norwalk, CT
Your Downsizing Specialist

I'm making my top 10 list today! Thank you!

Feb 14, 2018 05:04 AM #8
John Wiley
Right Move Real Estate Group- EXP Realty - Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL Real Estate GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

What a great reminder! 

We often avoid those things that really are important to our health and our business.


Feb 14, 2018 05:54 AM #9
Pat Starnes, Brandon, MS
Front Gate Real Estate - Brandon, MS
Broker Associate, ABR, 601-278-4513

Yesterday was a beast of a day and it was due to avoiding the unpleasant things on my plate that needed to be dealt with. Thanks for the push to do the uncomfortable

Feb 14, 2018 07:01 AM #10
Michael Goodheim
Commission Express of Western Washington - Seattle, WA
Cash Flow Expert for Real Estate Pros

Such an important topic for all of us to address.  Oftentimes when we tackle the item we are avoiding, we gain great satisfaction in addressing it - so we are really puting off that satsifaction!

I believe that the list may be helpful, but can lead to another bad behavior (which I admit to succombing to from time to time) - only doing the easy things on your list, while avoiding the difficult or undesirable items.  I remember a technique that requires you to classify your 'to do' list items into "A", "B" and "C" - in descending order of importance.  Then you develop a discipline of tackling the "B"s and "C"s only after tackling some "A"s.  Nothing more satsifying than crossing things off of a list!

Feb 14, 2018 09:36 AM #11
Sharon Parisi
United Real Estate Dallas - Dallas, TX
Dallas Homes

This is a good reminder for everyone. I like your suggestions in the comment above about a prioritized list with a deadline.

Feb 14, 2018 09:19 PM #12
Mary Hutchison, SRES, ABR
Better Homes and Gardens Real Estate-Kansas City Homes - Kansas City, MO
Specializing in Brookside, Waldo, Prairie Village

Of course we avoid things that make us uncomfortable!  Especially when dealing with our job, having to deliver unexpected bad news or having a deal fall apart.  Deal with it and move on!

Feb 15, 2018 09:48 AM #13
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Denise Lones

CSP, MIRM, CDEI - Real Estate Coaching & Branding
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