Behavior VS Attitude - Which works faster and better?

Real Estate Agent with HomeSmart International AZ Broker BR030809000


After reading Mike Cooper's post The lifespan of a blog I thought, what the heck I'll go back and check my numbers since it's been awhile. I highly recommend you read Mike's post and take a look at your numbers too. Quite informative and enlightening activity to do today and into the future.


Honestly I wasn't shocked with my results.  The same post that continues to go on and on and on, had nothing to do with being a real estate professional and yet it has everything to do with being a real estate professional and every other business for that matter!  It was posted in June of 2009. Let's see if this new revived post receives a few more comments then it did back then (2). So far the 2009 post has 17,347 views and 301 short url clicks. Somebody out there appreciated the post! And maybe you will too! Let's hope the post continues to give some food for thought as well! And isn't that the point of blogging!


Behavior Affects Attitude; Attitude Affects Behavior


One of Behavior VS Attitude - Which works faster and better?the fastest ways to change our external circumstances is to change the way we think about things! No matter how well trained we are at controlling our self-talk, sometimes we confuse two basic concepts: attitude and behavior.



Behavior is, quite simply, the way we act - the things we do and including tone of voice, facial expressions, hand gestures, eye contact, and word choices etc. Generally speaking, behavior follows attitude. We tend to behave the way we feel.


Sometimes, though, we find ourselves in a position when we have to alter our behavior to be different from our underlying attitude. I heard a contractor at a recent networking event describe a success he'd recently had. When working with a very challenging client, he learned to bite his tongue and let her be right, even when he would have preferred to argue with her. It was not easy but he's learned that letting the challenging client get the best of you usually doesn't bode well for the length of the client relationship. Granted, sometimes you definitely need to let some clients go elsewhere - but usually, as this contractor learned, a little discipline (behavior)helped change his attitude and made all the difference.


The lesson here is that we all have the ability to control our behaviors, independent of how we feel, because it's our conscious minds that determine how we act. The most amazing outcome of this awareness is that by controlling our behavior, we can control our attitudes - exactly the reverse of the way most people live.


We can choose how we want to feel by choosing the way we behave!




Our attitude affects our behavior. Likewise, our behavior affects our attitude. Like the graphic depicts, this means there are two ways to get to the same place. We can start on the inside, changing the programmed beliefs and thought patterns that determine our values, which in turn affect our attitudes, which therefore determine our behaviors. The thing about this process of change is that it can take a LONG LONG time. 


The quicker, more effective way is to change our behavior first. This is a much more active way of taking control of our life circumstances, and the marvelous thing is that our attitudes will change to reflect our new behavior.


Doubt it? Try this, right now. Push your chair back from your desk, stand up, and yell at the top of your lungs, I AM ENTHUSIASTIC!" Yes, your office-mates will think you're nuts, but maybe, just maybe you can teach them  and you )something new.


The fact is, you can't pretend to be enthusiastic if you don't have at least a little enthusiasm for what you're doing. If you stood up and whispered, " I am enthusiastic," so low that your potted plants could barely hear you, you probably didn't experience a noticeable change in attitude. But if you really took me seriously and shouted at the top of your lungs, " I  AM ENTHUSIASTIC!!" I can promise that you feel differently now than you did when you first started reading this post.


Behavior can follow attitude, but why do it the hard way? If you focus on taking control of your behavior so that your attitude follows, you'll begin to see shifts in every area of your personal and professional life.



Behavior VS Attitude - Which works faster and better? 


Posted by




Anna “Banana” Kruchten

Broker, CRS, CRB

HomeSmart International


Certified Residential Broker  CRB

Certified Residential Specilist CRS

AZ DRE Certified Real Estate Instuctor


 Your Referrals & Testimonials Are Greatly Appreciated!











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Sheri Sperry - MCNE®
Coldwell Banker Realty - Sedona, AZ
(928) 274-7355 ~ YOUR Solutions REALTOR®

Great blog Anna Banana Kruchten CRB, CRS, Broker - Now I have to go back and read Mike Cooper 's blog.  I have a very recent client who I had to bite my tongue more than one time...but we should be closing the following week on a luxury home. So controlling behavior is very important in our business.

Mar 21, 2018 05:34 PM #2
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Hi Anna- this is very much what I learned in Grad School and behavioral psychology. Where it would seem that the first thing to do is change someone's attitude ultimately changing their behavior, it was believed that if we can change our behavior first, then often our attitude would change. 


                               Congratulations, you've been featured in the Group Bananatude.

Mar 21, 2018 05:39 PM #3
Janice Zaltman
United Realty Group - Boca Raton, FL
South Florida Residential Real Estate

That's exciting stats Anna Banana Kruchten CRB, CRS, Broker and a reflection of what we face every day.  Each day, whatever shows up,  we can smile and deal with it with a great attitude. Thank you!

Mar 21, 2018 05:42 PM #4
Mike Cooper, GRI
Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Neighborhood Real Estate Sales Pro

Anna, I have a feeling you'll get far more than 2 comments this time. In a past life, I practiced cognitive-behavioral therapy. It follows a very similar path as your blog. Thoughts may ultimately become actions. Because of that, how we think becomes more important than ever. Kathy Strieb and I have similar backgrounds. I'm not surprised at all to see her posting early. 

Mar 21, 2018 06:56 PM #5
Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

Anna I have not seen Mike's Post but I am all about attitude, I conscientiously start my day with a positive attitude and continue work at it all day with that said my behavior is fun and positive and people enjoy talking with me even if we are discussing problems and looking to solve challenges...Endre

Mar 21, 2018 10:27 PM #6
Wayne Martin
Wayne M Martin - Chicago, IL
Real Estate Broker - Retired

Good morning Anna. That "attitude" thing is hard to change but often needs adjustment. Enjoy your day!

Mar 22, 2018 04:55 AM #7
Hannah Williams
Re/Max Eastern inc. - Philadelphia, PA
Expertise NE Philadelphia & Bucks 215-953-8818

Anna Banana Kruchten CRB, CRS, Broker  I have not seen Mike Cooper  post either and will try to find it keeping a positive attitude is key to success

Mar 22, 2018 06:43 AM #8
Carol Williams
Although I'm retired, I love sharing my knowledge and learning from other real estate industry professionals. - Wenatchee, WA
Retired Agent / Broker / Property Manager

Hi Anna Banana Kruchten CRB, CRS, Broker ,
You know you're preaching to the choir with me, right?     Attitude determines altitude but you can't maintain a positive attitude without changing behavior.  That fits into the description of "insanity". 

Body language is a big factor, too.

Mar 22, 2018 08:04 AM #9
George Souto
George Souto NMLS #65149 FHA, CHFA, VA Mortgages - Middletown, CT
Your Connecticut Mortgage Expert

Anna I just took a look at my stats and I have 7 blogs with more than 20,000 views, only 3 of them were featured posts.  The one with the most view (31,009) was not a featured post and does not have any short URL's.

Mar 22, 2018 11:02 AM #10
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Good afternoon Anna Banana Kruchten CRB, CRS, Broker - there is no question in my mind why this evergreen posting still gets hits.  In fact, I am book marking it now.

Mar 22, 2018 12:04 PM #11
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543
Long & Foster Real Estate Inc 610-225-7400 - Devon, PA
Tredyffrin Easttown Realtor, Philly Main Line

Nice post, you can have an attitude, but behaviour speaks louder about your attitiude than attitude will about your behaviour.

Mar 22, 2018 01:04 PM #12
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

OK, I screamed and I feel great!

I have to scream more often! Thank you!

Mar 22, 2018 01:25 PM #13
Chris Ann Cleland
Long and Foster REALTORS®, Gainesville, VA - Bristow, VA
Associate Broker, Bristow, VA

No wonder that's your best trafficked post.  What a powerful message.  And an important one.  Our behaviors do prodcue better attitudes.

Mar 22, 2018 01:31 PM #14
Debb Janes EcoBroker and Bernie Stea JD
ViewHomes of Clark County - Nature As Neighbors - Camas, WA
REALTORS® in Clark County, WA

I too had a really good yell. Hahaha. It's so true and love this post, Anna. I can see why its important message lives on and on and on. A good attitude and controlled behavior are a winning combination. D 

Mar 22, 2018 04:01 PM #15
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Now you have broken the previous posting comments. Great.

What you point out is good.

What you project: enthusiasm is great.

Our thought do affect our actions.

Glad you shared.

Mar 23, 2018 12:08 PM #16
Yolanda Cordova-Gilbert
Richmond, TX


 I really liked this blog and you are correct when I started this business, I did not have a lot of patience but in this business you have to survive! I hope you have a wonderful day!

Mar 24, 2018 03:30 PM #17
Scott Godzyk
Godzyk Real Estate Services - Manchester, NH
One of the Manchester NH's area Leading Agents

I often think one's behavior is affected by their attitude Anna Banana Kruchten CRB, CRS, Broker. I need to check out his post. Have a good Monday

Mar 26, 2018 10:36 AM #18
MichelleCherie Carr Crowe Just Call...408-252-8900
Get Results Team...Just Call (408) 252-8900! . DRE #00901962 . Licensed to Sell since 1985 . Altas Realty - San Jose, CA
Family Helping Families Buy & Sell Homes 40+ Years

Good attitude results in positive behavior-and vice versa, as you wrote Anna Banana Kruchten.

Mar 26, 2018 04:14 PM #19
Debbie Reynolds
Platinum Properties - Clarksville, TN
Your Dedicated Clarksville TN Real Estate Agent

You display both and these are great traits to have. I know people love being around you.

Mar 26, 2018 07:58 PM #20
Debe Maxwell, CRS | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
The right Charlotte REALTOR!

Oh, change the behavior and the attitude follows - ABSOLUTELY, Anna!

Thankfully, I came out of the womb with a Pollyanna attitude and it has served me well my entire life...and you, I believe, as well!

Have a great week...

Mar 26, 2018 10:28 PM #21
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