To notarize, or not to notarize--that is the question

To Notarize or Not to Notarize

To notarize, or not to notarize--that is the question:

Whether 'tis nobler in the courts to suffer

The slings and arrows of outrageous fraud

Or to take arms against a sea of hucksters

And by opposing end them. To Ack, to Jurat--

No more--and by our commissions to say we end

The foolishness, and the thousand natural shocks

That our clients are heir to. 'Tis a Judgement

Devoutly to be wished. To Jurat to Acknowledge--

To Notarize--perchance Legally: ay, there's the rub,

For in that signature of death what fraud may come

When we have signed off this mortal document,

Must give us pause. There's the paradox

That makes calamity of our commissions long life.

For who would bear the proofs and signings of much time,

Th' scheduler's wrongs, the proud man's mortgage

The pangs of despised HUDs, the law's delay,

The insolence of Title and the spurns of Escrow

That patient advantage of th' worthy borrower takes,

When he himself might his fees make

With a sly TIL? Who would falsehood bear,

To grunt and sweat at signing table,

But that the dread of no check till after death,

The undiscovered signing service, from whose bourn

No payment err returns, puzzles the will,

And makes us rather curse those ills we have

Than sign with others that we know not of?

Thus no checks does make cowards of us all,

And thus the native hue of revolution

Is sicklied o'er with the cries of PayPal,

And enterprise of great solace and moment

With this regard their schedulers turn awry

And lose the signing of action. – Rats you say,

The unfair Confirmation! -- Nymph, in thy poison  

Be all your sins remembered.