It’s a casual world these days, but…

Reblogger Debbie Reynolds, C21 Platinum Properties
Managing Real Estate Broker with Platinum Properties- (931)771-9070 TN Broker: 208698

I agree it has become very casual and it is better to remain a little respectful and formal until given permission to get casual and use close and familiar terms.

Original content by Marte Cliff

Since the advent of the Internet, email, and texting, communication has become more and more informal. Many people no longer address each other by Mr., Mrs., Miss, Ms, or even Doctor.

That’s probably fine – but it depends upon the person you’re addressing.angry senior citizen

I think of my Mom – and how steaming mad she used to get if a doctor or nurse presumed to call her by her first name. They weren’t friends of hers, she hadn’t given them permission, and in her view, it was an insult – a put-down.

That’s pretty much the way I feel if some stranger calls me honey, dear, or sweetie.

If you’re dealing primarily with young people, they’ll probably expect you to use their first names, but if you’re hoping to score points with older retirees, you might want to think twice. If you say “Mrs. Jones” and she says “call me Susan,” then you’re fine to do so. If she doesn’t give you that permission, then you should continue to say Mrs. Jones.

Meanwhile, if you say “Susan” and she gives you a glare, you probably aren’t going to get that listing or sale.

If you’re using my Senior Relocation letters, I definitely think you should stick with using titles unless you become acquainted and they tell you to use their first name. Why take a chance on that letter going straight to the trash?

Earlier today I learned that one of my customers who is using my Probate Prospecting letters has been referring to the deceased by their first names. I suggested that she change that, as it might seem insulting to the executor and heirs, given that she had never met the person.

Another thought - if your specialty is military relocation, would those officers appreciate it if you addressed them by their first names? It might be something to consider.

It may be a casual world, but respect never really will go out of style.


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 Centruy 21 Platinum Properties2130 Wilma Rudolph Blvd.

Clarksville, TN 37040

When you need Real Estate services in Clarksville TN

                  it would be my pleasure to assist you!                             

Debbie Reynolds
"The Real Debbie Reynolds"

Check out all Clarksville TN Real Estate on My Website

931-771-9070 Office | 931-320-6730 Cell

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Pat Starnes-Front Gate Realty
Front Gate Real Estate - Brandon, MS
601-991-2900 Office; 601-278-4513 Cell

Military titles can be confusing if you are unfamiliar with them, but I certainly agree the title is a sign of respect and is earned, and should be used whenever possible. 

Nov 19, 2018 06:37 AM
Joan Cox
House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373 - Denver, CO
Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time

Debbie, great post to reblog, and Marte has sage advice.  Until you know them, keep the endearing terms to ourselves.

Nov 19, 2018 06:54 AM
Sheila Anderson
Referral Group Incorporated - East Brunswick, NJ
The Real Estate Whisperer Who Listens 732-715-1133

Good morning Debbie. This is a wonderful re-blog and I loved it. Now off to tell Marte.

Nov 19, 2018 07:29 AM
Bill Roberts
Brooks and Dunphy Real Estate - Oceanside, CA
"Baby Boomer" Retirement Planner

Hi Debbie Reynolds I hope it is OK to call you Debbie. I realize that we have never "met" face-to-face, but I feel like I have known you for years. Many years, actually.

Your friend,

Bill Roberts

Nov 19, 2018 07:45 AM
Roy Kelley
Retired - Gaithersburg, MD

Thanks so much, Debbie, for sharing this excellent reblog selection.

When we moved from Virginia to Maryland many years ago, I had to adjust to people calling me by my first name.

Nov 19, 2018 11:11 AM
George Souto
George Souto NMLS #65149 - Middletown, CT
Your Connecticut Mortgage Expert

Debbie these days it is not just language that has become casual and informal, it is also the way people in the Real Estate Industry dress as well.  I am OK with business casual, but it has gone way beyond that.

Nov 19, 2018 03:45 PM
Laura Cerrano
Feng Shui Manhattan Long Island - Locust Valley, NY
Certified Feng Shui Expert, Speaker & Researcher

It is casual but that doesn’t mean it’s not viable in that way that it should be. Everything kind of has its place that way.

Nov 20, 2018 11:06 PM