How Far Would You Go For a Colonoscopy?

By
Real Estate Agent with Lyon Real Estate BRE #00697006

I've heard of emergency helicopter rides from Kona to Honolulu that supposedly cost $8,000. Although to fly one-way in coach on Hawaiian Airlines, today's fare is only $79. Which means if you can schedule your emergency doctor visits, you'll save a ton of money. On top of this, the distance between the Ellison Onizuka Kona International Airport at Keāhole and the Daniel K. Inouye International Airport (Honolulu International Airport) is 163.28 miles. Flight time is about 45 minutes.

If all goes well, you get off the plane, go down the escalator, and hop into your cab for a 4 or 5 mile ride. What could be easier? And fortunately, it wasn't MY colonoscopy we had to fly from Kona to Honolulu for. That's the best part.

The problem we encountered was trying to get home. Well, that, and an appraiser in Sacramento would NOT leave me alone. He wanted ME to make the appointment for the appraisal, and he had questions. Lots of questions that he simply could not be bothered to put into an email or a text message and he insisted upon talking by phone. Look buddy, I'm at the HOSPITAL!! Finally he backed off. Although it didn't help that my team member told him I was on vacation. Sheesh. Since when have these old appraisers been so damn pushy?

But back to getting home. The procedure started earlier than we had anticipated, and ended earlier than we thought, too. So we were faced with 4 hours between us and going back to Kona. I tried to change our reservations online, but because my friend's insurance company had paid for the trip, we could not do it. Which meant, like that grouchy old apprasier, I had to call Hawaiian Airlines myself.

We got the trip home confirmed on an earlier flight. Yay! But, since I was physically sitting in the hospital waiting room, I could not print our boarding passes. The reservations clerk at Hawaiian continued to insist that I could get a mobile ticket, and I continued to inform her I was using my laptop computer and no, I could not choose an option for a mobile ticket. That's when she lowered the bomb on me that I needed to use the Hawaiian Airlines app.

I asked: You are aware that the Hawaiian Airlines app is broken, right? I tried to use the app a few years ago and it didn't work. It still doesn't work today, although it seems abandoned now. Just got a blue screen that said something is not right. Yeah, something is not right all right. That something is the fact that Hawaiian Airlines is not operating in the 21st century. For an airline founded in 1929 with almost 60 aircraft, they can do oh-so-much better.

I deleted the app from my phone and reinstalled. Still didn't work. Tried it off WiFi. Nope. Turned off my VPN. Nope. Well, thank god for kiosks at the airport.

Oh, as an odd sideline, I picked up a listing while sitting in the waiting room. A seller I could not get in touch with finally emailed me. I explained that I had to accompany my friend to get a colonoscopy at a special place because my friend has a stent in her heart. She can't go just anywhere for a colonoscopy. It takes a special anethesia. For which this seller was very grateful because it turns out he has a stent in HIS heart and has not yet had a colonoscopy. The things you learn . . .

You can read more in my personal blog today about that experience at this link: Taking a Friend to Kaiser in Honolulu for a Colonoscopy.

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Elizabeth Weintraub is an author, home buying expert for About.com, a Land Park resident, and a veteran real estate agent who specializes in older, classic homes in Land Park, Curtis Park, Midtown and East Sacramento, as well as tract homes in Elk Grove, Natomas, Roseville and Lincoln. Weintraub is also a Sacramento Short Sale agent who lists and successfully sells short sales throughout the four-county Sacramento area with an emphasis on Elk Grove. Call Elizabeth Weintraub at 916.233.6759. Put 40 years of real estate experience to work for you. Broker-Associate at Lyon Real Estate. BRE License # 00697006.

The Short Sale Savior, by Elizabeth Weintraub, available with free shipping.

Photo: Unless otherwise noted in this blog, the photo is copyrighted by Big Stock Photo and used with permission.The views expressed herein are Weintraub's personal views and do not reflect the views of Lyon Real Estate. Disclaimer: If this post contains a listing, information is deemed reliable as of the date it was written. After that date, the listing may be sold, listed by another brokerage, canceled, pending or taken temporarily off the market, and the price could change without notice; it could blow up, explode or vanish. To find out the present status of any listing, please go to elizabethweintraub.com.

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Rainmaker
478,591
Francine Viola
Coldwell Banker Evergreen Olympic Realty, Olympia WA - Olympia, WA
In Tune with your Real Estate Needs - Olympia WA

Sounds worse than trying to get over the river and through the woods!

Nov 29, 2018 09:38 AM #1
Rainmaker
3,854,134
William Feela
WHISPERING PINES REALTY - North Branch, MN
Realtor, Whispering Pines Realty 651-674-5999 No.

You just made me glad to live in the main area of this great nation

Nov 29, 2018 10:43 AM #2
Rainer
450,234
Dörte Engel
RE/MAX Leading Edge - Bowie, MD
ABC - Annapolis, Bowie, Crofton & rest of Maryland

Dear Elizabeth,

What an ordeal! I did not know that if you have a stent you need special anesthesia. Thank you for sharing. Will put out the word to the people I know with stents.

Nov 29, 2018 10:55 AM #3
Rainmaker
2,120,824
Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents
Lyon Real Estate - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

Francine Viola Most residents of Kona go to Waimea, but even that is an hour away.

Nov 29, 2018 11:40 AM #4
Rainmaker
2,120,824
Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents
Lyon Real Estate - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

William Feela Oh, yeah, right, like you enjoy driving into St. Paul during a blizzard, which is how far from your house again?

Nov 29, 2018 11:41 AM #5
Rainmaker
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Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents
Lyon Real Estate - Sacramento, CA
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Dörte Engel You are a hard one to tag because the system doesn't recognize the two dots over your O. LOL.

Kaiser protocol is anybody with a stent needs special anesthesia. I don't know if every health insurer does, though.

Nov 29, 2018 11:45 AM #6
Rainmaker
3,832,750
Joan Cox
Metro Brokers - House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373 - Denver, CO
Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time

Elizabeth, sure sounds like you had an interesting day!   Your friend is lucky you were available to take her, and congrats on a new listing too! 

Nov 29, 2018 04:31 PM #7
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Debbie Reynolds
Platinum Properties - Clarksville, TN
Your Dedicated Clarksville TN Real Estate Agent

Oh what a story. Pushy appraisers are never fun to deal with. You are a good friend to accompany your friend having a colonoscopy. 

Nov 29, 2018 05:38 PM #8
Rainmaker
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Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents
Lyon Real Estate - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

Joan Cox As the nurse was hauling my friend away, my phone rang and I answered it. My friend looked at the nurse and and said, "oh, it's OK, we can go, she's in real estate."

Ha, ha, ha. Like that explained everything.

Nov 29, 2018 06:32 PM #9
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Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Elizabeth- you truly are a friend!!!  Larry has 3 stents and has had colonoscopies but I suppose they knew what kind of anesthesia he needed. 

I had to laugh at your line  "By now I have it down to a science and have eliminated most of the nasty aspects of it"  Very fitting for a colonoscopy. 

Nov 29, 2018 06:33 PM #10
Rainmaker
2,120,824
Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents
Lyon Real Estate - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

Debbie Reynolds The funniest part was the ride to the airport, and my friend was still a bit loopy. We had a grumpy cab driver. My friend began to describe her "twilight" experience, saying "they kept bumping into pockets, and it was painful, and that's not how you do a colonoscopy."

So I said, "Well, Linda, I hope you told the doctor that he was doing it all wrong; they really need to know this stuff . . . "

She was drugged and didn't get my humor, but the cab driver was roaring with laughter.

Nov 29, 2018 07:16 PM #11
Rainmaker
3,280,485
Sheila Anderson
Referral Group Incorporated - East Brunswick, NJ
The Real Estate Whisperer Who Listens 732-715-1133

Good morning Elizabeth. You are a good friend and things worked out ultimately.

Nov 30, 2018 05:05 AM #12
Rainmaker
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Michael Jacobs
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage - Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena Area Real Estate 818.516.4393

Hello Elizabeth- - -you truly have a knack for knowing how to get to the bottom of issues. That makes you tops in your role as a Sacramento real estate professional. 

Nov 30, 2018 07:41 AM #13
Rainmaker
2,325,504
Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

I can't imagine doing an island hop on top of everything else including the colonoscopy prep to get through the day (and the day before), Elizabeth.  There has to be a better way!

Nov 30, 2018 10:09 AM #14
Rainmaker
4,604,195
Barbara Todaro
RE/MAX Executive Realty - Franklin, MA
"Franklin MA Homes"

Hi Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents it's a good thing I didn't need to go through that nonsense to have a colonoscopy.... I would not have had it!!!  I went locally and it took me 70 years to get there... yes, my first was two years ago.... they said they'd see me in 10 years... 80???  I told them I'd be back in another 70 years.... what the hell!

Nov 30, 2018 11:49 AM #15
Ambassador
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Tammy Lankford,
Lane Realty Eatonton, GA Lake Sinclair, Milledgeville, 706-485-9668 - Eatonton, GA
Broker GA Lake Sinclair/Eatonton/Milledgeville

My team knows better than to use the vacation word.  It seems to bring out the worst in people if they know you take time off.  And I really need to get one of those scheduled or my doctor is going to yell at me in January.

Nov 30, 2018 01:34 PM #16
Rainmaker
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Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents
Lyon Real Estate - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

Michael Jacobs I have learned you can't wait around for things that may or may not happen. It's easier to pick up the phone and make it happen. If somebody says, geez, what a b-tch she called us twice, so be it.

Nov 30, 2018 03:46 PM #17
Rainmaker
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Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents
Lyon Real Estate - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

Myrl Jeffcoat There is a better way. You drive to Waimea. But my friend could not go there. Kaiser wouldn't allow it. Liability, you know. It's always about liability and not the patient.

Nov 30, 2018 03:47 PM #18
Rainmaker
2,120,824
Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Real Estate Agent, Top 1% of Lyon Agents
Lyon Real Estate - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

Barbara Todaro Holy crappola, no colonoscopy for 70 years? I know they want another from me but there has to come a time when you just say no, say no to the colonoscopy, LOL. Maybe I will do a third, maybe not.

Nov 30, 2018 03:49 PM #19
Rainmaker
2,962,762
Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

Elizabeth, the Title almost made me not read your post:) Anything starting with Colonoscopy would tell me how fast and far can I get away:))Endre

Nov 30, 2018 10:18 PM #20
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