Thank you for your "no."

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with 406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty RRE-BRO-LIC-75443

Many years ago, I wrote a novel. Since then, once a year or so, I'd dust it off and send a query note to a literary agent or two. Then I'd get busy with life and forget about it for another year when I'd repeat the same process. Late last year, I had a wake-up moment. One of those, "What are you doing with your life?" moments. And among other decisions, I decided that every single day of the week except Sunday I would find a literary agent to query. And I'd keep doing that until I ran out of agents. Then I'd find another way to pursue the publication of my first story.

 

At the same time I decided to regularly pursue agents, I read something from someone (I apologize about the lack of details but I don't remember where I read it, or who wrote it) that indicated they purposely spent a year trying to fail. They applied for jobs they'd never get. They took risks they knew would not pay off. And you know what happened? Many things did fail as expected, but the person was actually successful something like 40% of the time. They got jobs they didn't have the right skills for. I thought that was such a fun concept, to do things where you know you will fail a certain number of times. That behavior certainly makes a person go beyond their comfort zone.

 

Thank you for your "no."So I married those two ideas, my desire to find an agent for my book and my being willing to fail. Which doesn't mean I'm going to fail. I will eventually publish my book, one way or another. But the point is that some of the people I am submitting a few chapters to are people I think will say "no." People who are agents for very famous and well read authors. Some of the agents are those whose websites only indicate a slight interest in the type of book I've written. So they'll probably say no. But you never know!!!

 

And sometimes you DO never know. What I have found is that literary agents are apparently the only profession that does not have to get back to people. If someone calls me in my real estate business, I'm on it! I call, text, email, whatever. If I call a doctor's office, I get a call back. Same with any other type of professional I know of. But literary agents? They specifically say, "if you don't hear from us in a few months, we're not interested." But one wonders, did they even get my query? Did they see my chapters? And in addition to stating they just won't respond if they don't like the work, they also say, "Don't follow up. Don't call. Don't tweet us. Don't write."

 

Since I've been sending information to a different agent every day for the last month or two, I am finally getting some responses. So far they are all "no's." But I have been thanking every single agent who takes the time to respond to me, with a personal thank you in return. Thank you for your response. I truly do appreciate that they actually read my email, thought about what I wrote, and took the time to respond. I don't even mind if they send me a form email. At least they cared enough to do that.

 

Thank you for your "no."I am thanking them because I am grateful I now know for sure that specific agent is not the right one for me, so I can continue to look for the right one. Today, though, was the agent that will forever have the blue prize in my literary agent quest. That is because, even though she said "no", she actually responded the very same day I requested her review. And her response was a personalized note about what I had written. Wow. I love that agent.

 

So thank you to anyone who has ever told me "no" about something. Because that gave me the direction to try a different path to get to the "yes" I know is waiting.

 

Take risks, get rejected, take more risks. That is the path I am following. Join me.

 

 

Originally published at thehousekat.com.

 

Posted by

 

Kat Palmiotti, The House Kat

Licensed Broker, CBR®

 

Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp

P.O. Box 10458

Kalispell, MT 59904

 

eXp Realty - New York

 

email: kat@thehousekat.com

www.thehousekat.com

 

406-270-3667 (MT) and 914-419-0270 (NY)

 

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Re-Blogged 2 times:

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Rainmaker
5,499,959
Roy Kelley
Realty Group Referrals - Gaithersburg, MD

Good Monday morning, Kat.

Have a great day and an outstanding week.

Jan 21, 2019 06:40 AM #43
Rainmaker
536,752
Mary Hutchison, SRES, ABR
Better Homes and Gardens Real Estate-Kansas City Homes - Kansas City, MO
Experienced Agent in Kansas City Metro area

I regularly listen to a podcast called The Need to Fail.  it's always a learning experience.  Younger pp need to realize this...and yes, need to fail. Congrats on your...success !

Jan 21, 2019 10:52 AM #44
Rainmaker
1,468,889
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Exactly, M.C. Dwyer - I don't take the no's personally either, whether they are real estate or book related!

Thank you Roy Kelley - I hope your week is wonderful also.

Thank you Mary Hutchison, SRES, ABR - That sounds like an interesting series.

Jan 21, 2019 02:01 PM #45
Rainmaker
876,932
Elyse Berman, PA
Best Connections Realty, Inc. - Boca Raton, FL
Boca Raton FL (561) 716-7824 CRS, ABR, GRI,ePR

Good for you Kat Palmiotti !  Keep at it and don't give up.  Did you ever hear the story about Sylvester Stallone and Rocky?  I heard it on one of Tony Robbins tapes.  It talks about how many times he was rejected with the script of Rocky and being an actor and how he went on to read all the rejections at the Oscars.  Pursue your dream!

Jan 22, 2019 02:54 AM #46
Rainmaker
1,468,889
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Elyse Berman - Thank you for that encouraging story! That would have been a great Oscar speech.

Jan 22, 2019 02:58 AM #47
Rainmaker
1,365,946
Carol Williams
Although I'm retired, I love sharing my knowledge and learning from other real estate industry professionals. - Wenatchee, WA
Retired Agent / Broker / Property Manager

Hi Kat,
I love this post!   I didn't come across this until today but it is what I needed to read.  I am in the set-up phases of a new project and I need to be able to get out there and quit stalling. It's easy to stall until everything is in place.  I'm going to thank anyone I contact for the "no" or even the no response.

It is so important for us all to understand that we can fail to success if we are persistent. Thanks for the reminder. 

And, good luck with getting your novel published.  What is it about?

Jan 22, 2019 10:49 AM #48
Rainmaker
1,468,889
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Carol Williams 

I do think failing is important in all of life - that's how we learn what doesn't work, and what we can try next time! As for the novel, it's a story about the week in the life of a divorced mom and her troubled son (police interactions, attendance at forbidden party, etc!)

 

Jan 22, 2019 04:58 PM #49
Rainmaker
497,408
Paula Hathaway, REALTOR, LBA
Douglas Elliman Real Estate - Southampton, NY
...A Local Expert in all The Hamptons

Hi Kat: I think that to write a book and try to publish it is one of the most difficult things in life! I am in the process and as many members here on AR know, I have been writing it for more than 2 years now--and it is just now that I have reached a time where I think I may be ready to publish...it will be part of a trilogy--you may have read introductions to the book right here on  AR! "The Sled" was the first, " A Little Bird Told Me" was the second and the third was "A Purposeful Life". Good luck to you with your book..it should be picked up soon since you have been in contact with so many agents!

Jan 24, 2019 12:03 PM #50
Rainmaker
2,522,499
Rebecca Gaujot, Realtor®
Vision Quest Realty - Lewisburg, WV
Lewisburg WV, the go to agent for all real estate

Kat, I enjoyed reading this post and how the "nos" will get you that "yes".  

Jan 26, 2019 06:02 AM #51
Rainmaker
1,468,889
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Paula Hathaway, REALTOR, LBA - How interesting! Now I'll have to go read your introductions!

Rebecca Gaujot, Realtor® - Thank you! Enough no's can eventually turn into a yes! (Not yet though!)

Jan 26, 2019 11:09 AM #52
Ambassador
3,440,115
Debe Maxwell, CRS
www.iCharlotteHomes.com | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
Charlotte Homes for Sale - Charlotte Neighborhoods

OMG, I did not see this on the feature board this morning and wondered when I read it, why on earth it hadn't been featured, Kat! I now see that I just missed that it was! 

Wonderful way to approach life and business - I love this! 

Happy Monday!

Jan 28, 2019 09:33 AM #53
Rainmaker
4,432,467
Gita Bantwal
RE/MAX Centre Realtors - Warwick, PA
REALTOR,ABR,CRS,SRES,GRI - Bucks County & Philadel

Kat, I hope it will soon be YES. Good luck.

Jan 29, 2019 11:34 AM #54
Rainmaker
3,236,459
Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

Kat Palmiotti  there is a famous guy by the name of Sly Stallone... he took his screenplay to about a 1000 people and he had one contingency, that he would play the part...well you  know the rest is history... No on a side note reach out to Gwen Banta  she is now on her third or fourth book that has been published...and she is on the platform, Endre

Jan 30, 2019 10:15 PM #55
Rainmaker
392,162
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Kat, please contact me directly if you would like to discuss this further. Endre Barath is correct that I am about to have my fourth book published. I’ll be happy to pass along as much information as I can.

Jan 31, 2019 01:58 AM #56
Rainmaker
1,468,889
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Thank you for your comment, Debe Maxwell, CRS - The feature was a surprise!

Thank you Gita Bantwal - It will be yes eventually!

Endre Barath, Jr. - Yes, Sylvester Stallone definitely had/has determination! After that first one, I bet he got a lot of "yes's" - andn thank you for the information about Gwen.

 

Jan 31, 2019 02:57 AM #57
Rainmaker
1,468,889
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Thank you Gwen Banta - I will send you a private message.

Jan 31, 2019 02:57 AM #58
Rainmaker
711,374
John Juarez
The Medford Real Estate Team - Fremont, CA
ePRO, SRES, GRI, PMN

I certainly love your enthusiasm,dedication and persistence. I am sure your hard work carries over to your real estate business to the benefit of your clients.

Feb 17, 2019 03:33 PM #59
Rainmaker
1,468,889
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Thank you John Juarez - Eventually there will be a "yes!"

Feb 18, 2019 02:52 AM #60
Rainmaker
2,071,119
Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP
DFW FINE PROPERTIES - Fort Worth, TX
Selling Homes Changing Lives

Kat Palmiotti - I have a feeling if it hasn't happened yet, it will by the time you settle down in Montana. Persistence does pay off and I know you're not a quitter. I look forward to the day you get your YES!!!

Jul 02, 2019 05:10 AM #61
Rainmaker
1,468,889
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP - I hate to say it, but I haven't been sending my daily requests for a few months; life got in the way again and I lost focus. Thanks for the reminder!

Jul 02, 2019 05:18 AM #62
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