Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat & Smack-talk

Real Estate Agent with Jameson Sotheby's International Realty

I don't know how I'm going to tie in that headline, yet.  I was watching Good Morning America and they had Samin Nostra on (star of Salt, Fat, Acid & Heat)... and I bastardized the headline.  Now I need to back it up with content. Usually I work the other way around: I write the post, and then I pull a headline out of the content.  Let's see how this works out.

I've been working with a buyer for the past few months, and he's very nice to work with... he's decisive, knows what he's looking for and takes his time when looking at properties.  He's a first-time buyer, so he asks a lot of questions, and they're usually good ones... and even better he values my opinion and responses.

We've even gotten way off track, and he asks my opinion about food, traffic, dating.. (salty?)... and he seems to value my opinions.  I mean "what the heck do I know about dating?"

Recently he asked me an involved real estate question.. it was a fairly fleshy question, and required a thoughtful (fatty?) response.  So I gave him a multi-faceted answer... (heat?) based on my many years in the business.

He didn't respond the way I expected, and he re-phrased the question.  I gave basically the same answer, slightly re-worded.  He wasn't having it.  So I asked him what the problem was.  He told me that he'd read something online that disagreed with my answer.  I explained again, and he still wasn't having it... in fact he seemed rather irked that I wasn't agreeing with the website.

He grew quiet and withdrawn... I got the sense he didn't like my answer, and I hadn't passed his 'test'. I tried to explain further, but in his mind he had moved-on.  And that was enough.  Apparently I had smack-talked his website, and that was the last time I saw him, or heard from him.  He no longer answers my emails, texts or voice mails.

Posted by

 ALAN MAY, Realtor®   
Specializing in Evanston Real Estate and North Shore Real Estate

Jameson Sotheby's International Realty, 2934 Central Street, Evanston, IL 60201
Office: 847.869.7300      Cell: 847.924.3313      Email:

Evanston Real Estate & North Shore Real Estate
Licensed in Illinois


Comments (22)

Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543
Long & Foster Real Estate Inc 610-225-7400 - Devon, PA
Tredyffrin Easttown Realtor, Philly Main Line

Interesting that he relies on a "facelss" website, rather than you who he has grown to know and like. Shame, but it sounds like you may be better off without him.

Aug 31, 2020 05:27 AM
Alan May

without a doubt.

Aug 31, 2020 05:48 AM
Wayne Martin
Wayne M Martin - Chicago, IL
Real Estate Broker - Retired

Good morning Alan. As they say you can't win them all and you are better off saying, "next"! Enjoy your day!

Aug 31, 2020 06:18 AM
Alan May

yep.  moving on.

Aug 31, 2020 07:23 AM
Erik Hiss
Keller Williams Capital Partners Realty - Worthington, OH
You can trust me for all your real estate needs!

Yeah, we can't please everyone and the faster we learn to get over it the better we'll be. Not to say we shouldn't make the effort, but in the end sometimes it's not worth anyone's time. When I first got my license, my mentor Joe Jackson, told me the grow "Duck feathers" so any problems just roll off like water on on ducks. Been using that ever since...thanks Joe!

Sep 02, 2020 05:36 AM
Alan May

true enough, Erik.  Duck feathers and thick skin.  "next".

Sep 02, 2020 05:41 AM
Dan Hopper
Dan Hopper - Gold Way RE - Westminster, CO
Denver Broker / Author / Advocate/Short Sale

As I once had a "mentor" tell me, "That's Life in the Big City".  It was his way of conveying an important message... you will never fully satisfy everyone you come in contact with.  Do not take it personally, even tho all signs is personal... move on and focus on the business that agrees with you.  Best wishes on the next one...  .

Sep 02, 2020 06:05 AM
Alan May

It's hard not to take it personally, Dan.  But I've learned to take it on the chin, and just move on.

Sep 02, 2020 08:29 AM
Lyn Sims
RE/MAX Suburban - Schaumburg, IL
Schaumburg Real Estate

The oddities of working in our business. I had something similar happen & you can tell by the 'scrunching of foreheads', my answer was not the one they wanted. That's not always how it goes in real estate.

Best one is 'who gets the earnest money'? No one ever likes that answer.

Sep 02, 2020 06:12 AM
Alan May

aaah.... the traditional "scrunching of the foreheads"... a time honoured tradition.

Sep 02, 2020 08:29 AM
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

So much advice on the Internet, and so much of it totally wrong.  Infinite chimps with typewriters.

Sep 02, 2020 06:17 AM
Alan May

if you put typewriters in front of enough chimps, you'll eventually end up with sh!t-covered typewriters.

Sep 02, 2020 08:30 AM
Shirley Coomer
Keller Williams Realty Sonoran Living - Phoenix, AZ
Realtor, Keller Williams Realty, Phoenix Az

Isn't everything we read on the internet the truth?  LOL

Sep 02, 2020 06:43 AM
Alan May

wait.... what?  it's not?

Sep 02, 2020 08:30 AM
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

Probably for the not matching up with whatever it is he read online was going to show up at some point...his loss.

Sep 02, 2020 08:31 AM
Alan May

you're right... probably for the best in the long run.

Sep 02, 2020 08:33 AM
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

Oh...and good job making your content fit your title. LOL

Sep 02, 2020 08:32 AM
Alan May

Why thank you... as you can tell it was a bit of a stretch.

Sep 02, 2020 08:34 AM
Gwen Fowler-864-638-3599 SC Mountains Lakes Homes
Gwen Fowler Real Estate, Inc - Salem, SC
Gwen Fowler Real Estate, Inc.

interesting content to go with your headline. The one thing I dislike about representing a buyer over a seller is that there is no contractual obligation.

Sep 02, 2020 08:32 AM
Alan May

Well, there CAN be a contractural relationship, if you have them sign an exclusive buyer's agreement Gwen Fowler-864-916-2019 SC Mountains Lakes Homes.  Right?

Sep 02, 2020 08:34 AM
Don Baker
Lane Realty - Eatonton, GA

was his name Leslie?  I kid, I kid.  But literallly (but during pending period) my wife had a similar client. It was a LONG 5 weeks.

Sep 02, 2020 12:39 PM
Alan May

yep.. it's a looong time when it's not workin'.

Sep 02, 2020 01:02 PM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH Real Estate - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

Yeah.  That happens.  And even if  you do have a buyer broker agreement, you really can't keep them with a peice of paper - at least unless you want to badmouthed at dinner parties for the next decade or so!

His loss, by the way!

Sep 02, 2020 08:08 PM
Alan May

I don't use exclusive buyer's agreements. I prefer to hold them to me by giving truly exceptional service.  If I'm performing my job and they're happy... they'll buy with me... if not, as you say, a piece of paper won't hold them.

Sep 02, 2020 08:15 PM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Sorry to hear what happened, Alan, but sounds like you are better off, since he seems to feel he knows more than you do, and that may have manifested itself in other ways. Next!


Sep 02, 2020 08:52 PM
Alan May

it was a sign of things to come, indeed.

Sep 03, 2020 05:58 AM
Marte Cliff
Marte Cliff Copywriting - Priest River, ID
Your real estate writer

Shame on you. Don't you know that every word written on line is the absolute truth?

Sep 02, 2020 08:56 PM
Alan May

I did know that... I did.

Sep 03, 2020 05:58 AM
Dorie Dillard Austin TX
Coldwell Banker Realty ~ 512.750.6899 - Austin, TX
NW Austin ~ Canyon Creek and Spicewood/Balcones

Good morning Alan May,

I'd say this buyer is definitely going to miss the relationship you formed up to the point you didn't agree with his authority website. Such a shame..but many believe what they read on the Internet and you can't change their minds. NEXT!

Sep 04, 2020 06:25 AM
Alan May

there's only so much you can do...

Sep 04, 2020 07:06 AM
Mary Hutchison, SRES, ABR
Better Homes and Gardens Real Estate-Kansas City Homes - Kansas City, MO
Experienced Agent in Kansas City Metro area

Wondering what the question was?!?  When a buyer ghosts an agent--so annoying.  You wasted a lot of time with him, and seemed to establish a friendly yet professional relationship/  Moving on!

Sep 04, 2020 12:11 PM
Alan May

It was a relatively innocuous question.  It wasn't a real "gotcha" question.

Sep 04, 2020 05:04 PM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH Real Estate - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

Hi, Alan.

Of course, I included your post in today's Last Week's Favorites post.  Thanks for writing it!




Sep 06, 2020 06:37 AM
Alan May

that is seriously one big thumbs-up.  Thank you.

Sep 06, 2020 03:49 PM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Hi Alan May - I can certainly relate.  Sometimes I just can't figure out what happened.

Sep 06, 2020 10:05 AM
Alan May

I think we've all been there at one point or another.

Sep 06, 2020 03:49 PM
Carol Culkin, ReeceNichols
ReeceNichols Real Estate - Overland Park, KS
Overland Park Residential Real Estate

That stinks, but you obviously speak truth and don't just tell people what they want to hear. Kudos to you! 

Sep 07, 2020 07:22 PM
Alan May

I've only got one gear, Carol.  And it's truth.

Sep 07, 2020 08:06 PM
Jan Green
Value Added Service, 602-620-2699 - Scottsdale, AZ
HomeSmart Elite Group, REALTOR®, EcoBroker, GREEN

Let me guess, he'sa bout 28 - 35?  I've seen that response before.  Love this title!  

Sep 10, 2020 09:12 PM
Alan May

I'm really bad at ages... but he was young.

Jan 12, 2021 07:59 PM

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