Do you ever notice that when you're feeling on top of the world others seem to be drawn to you? People pick up on good energy, confidence and because you're emanating that almost through your pores, it finds its way into the essence of others, whether they are consciously aware of it or not.
You don't have to be physically beautiful to attract a second look; a need for that person next to you to want to exchange a glance, a conversation, a friendship. Maya Angelou was iconic and she never felt that she was a beauty. Her magic, her groundedness, her spirit for joy and kindness caused all around her to take notice and pay attention to what she had to say. And we all found her to be beautiful. Being supremely confident, she even drew the need for another iconic woman, Oprah Winfrey to call her when she had down moments. One of my favorite stories is when Oprah called her crying about something she thought someone had done to her and Maya wisely told her: Stop your crying right now and be thankful. Because, you know God put a rainbow in every cloud. The rainbow is coming. Say thank you even though you can't see the rainbow. It's already there".
Surround yourself with people who bolster you, who truly think you are beautiful inside! Who tell you you are. The ones that mean it.
My sister sent me a card last year. On the front it said:
Ignore the Rain
Look for the Rainbow
On the inside it said:
If anyone can find it, you can
(never forget how amazing you are).
And she wrote such a beautiful message to me:
My Dear, dear, dear sister, I saw this card and thought of you instantly. You are a rainbow. Thank you for loving me like you do....
I keep this card where I can see it regularly as it is a reminder that I AM a rainbow and I love rainbows! And I not only love my sister dearly, but respect her highly. My sister is one of the most confident people I will ever know. She was terribly shy growing up, and would hide behind my mom's legs when someone came around. She is also one of the smartest people I'll ever know to boot. She has a killer sense of humor and is an amazing storyteller. She is an incredibly dynamic and successful businesswoman, mom and dear friend to many, including me. And people love her!
Confidence can be a "muscle" that you stretch and grow if you focus on it moment-to-moment. Looking at yourself with love and no judgement is an exercise we ought to do every single day. And optimism has to be one of the ingredients for creating that recipe of confidence as well. Kindness to yourself will most definitely generate the feeling of sending out kindness to others. All of these attributes create charisma and no matter who you are and your station in life, you can work on it and grow it and it will change your world. And those around you will be touched as well.