Reblogger Sally K. & David L. Hanson
Real Estate Agent with EXP Realty 414-525-0563 57026-90 Broker

Valuable sage words to live by ...and more importantly...listen to !

Original content by Grant Schneider

What we have here is a failure to communicate! That line from Cool Hand Luke highlights the consequences of miscommunication. Lack of real communication is one of the biggest causes of dysfunctional relationships in our business and personal lives.

In real estate sales as with all sales we communicate to impart information and, in the process, influence and urge action.  Although our objective is to do just that, sometimes, in fact often, we do not get the response we expect.  

One powerful reason for this failure is that we talk more than we listen. We are so concerned with making our own points and having someone understand us that we do not take the time to understand the other person. How often do we try to insert our own opinions to try to persuade others?

Communication requires a sender of the message and a receiver—that is to say that communication is a two-way process. That means we must listen to hear and understand the other person.

We need to listen twice as much as we talk. That is why we have two ears and one mouth. In order to connect with others, we have to understand this two-way process. I think it’s a fair statement to say that how well you listen has a major impact on your job effectiveness, and on the quality of your relationships with others.

For some reason people place a high priority on speaking and presentation skills but do not place the same emphasis on listening skills. Without downgrading the importance of good speech, it would be better for us to upgrade the importance and quality of our listening habits. If we believe that empathy is an important trait, then we should realize that is impossible to understand what someone is thinking or feeling if we do all of the talking.

Active listening is not just listening but listening to understand. Try improving your active listening by doing these 10 things:

1.     Stop Talking. You can’t talk and listen at the same time.

2.     Focus on the other person. Give the other person your undivided attention.

3.     Show active participation. Nod, ask questions, try to understand and give your full attention.

4.     Empathize. Take a moment to understand the other person’s viewpoint even if you disagree.

5.     Keep an open mind. Be very slow to disagree or criticize. Ask questions to probe for understanding.

6.     Have patience for people who take longer to express themselves.

7.     Nonverbal signals have more meaning than the words. Are the nonverbal signals in sync with the words?

8.     Watch for your nonverbal signals and control your emotions.

9.     Provide feedback. For example, paraphrase with, "What I'm hearing is," and "Sounds like you are saying."

10. Use humor. Sometimes we take ourselves too seriously. Appropriate humor can help to insure positive outcomes.



Your ability to understand and apply active listening principles will directly influence your results in your business, in sales, in leadership, and in your personal life.  For a similar post on our web site see WHAT HAS YOUR COMMUNICATION FAILURE COST YOU?

How effective is your communication? Could you use some help?

Contact us to learn more

or call 914-953-4458.


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Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Good morning Sally and David - thanks so much for re blogging and affirming the importance of listening.

Jun 24, 2019 05:32 AM #1
Norma J. Elkins
Elite Realty Group - Morristown, TN
Realtor - Elkins Home Selling Team

Love te reblog as I did not catch the first one.  Stop talking and start listening is the key I think!  Have a blessed day!

Jun 24, 2019 06:57 AM #2
Margaret Rome, Baltimore Maryland
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Good reblog. It takes the two...a sender and a receiver.

Jun 24, 2019 07:00 AM #3
Roy Kelley
Realty Group Referrals - Gaithersburg, MD

Thank you very much for sharing this excellent reblog selection.

Have an outstanding week.

Jun 24, 2019 07:09 AM #4
Paul S. Henderson, REALTOR®, CRS
RE/MAX Northwest. - Tacoma, WA
Tacoma Washington Agent/Broker & Market Authority!

 Thank you for sharing Grant Schneider’s blog post with us Sally K. & David L. Hanson 

Jun 24, 2019 07:35 AM #5
Sheri Sperry - MCNE®
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage - Sedona, AZ
(928) 274-7355 ~ YOUR Solutions REALTOR®

Hi Sally K. & David L. Hanson,

Most of us tend to be formulating our answer while the other person is speaking which tunes out the comprehension of the other party.  A good salesperson will listen intently when the other person is speaking.

Jun 24, 2019 07:39 AM #6
Will Hamm
Hamm Homes - Aurora, CO
"Where There's a Will, There's a Way!"

Hello Sally and David,  You pick a great reblog bu Grant Schneider on this subject.


Jun 24, 2019 08:33 AM #7
George Souto
George Souto NMLS #65149 FHA, CHFA, VA Mortgages - Middletown, CT
Your Connecticut Mortgage Expert

Sally and David, Grant made a lot of good points, but I especially love number #1

Jun 24, 2019 01:33 PM #8
Marte Cliff
Marte Cliff Copywriting - Priest River, ID
Your real estate writer

I wonder how many years it will take before people stop thinking "Cool Hand Luke" when they hear the words "failure to communicate?"

Great reblog - Grant offers wise specifics on how we can overcome that failure.

Jun 24, 2019 02:04 PM #9
James Dray
Fathom Realty - Bentonville, AR
Exceptional Agents, Outstanding Results

Morning Sally,

Grant sure did make some good points, didn't he.  Good re-blog, thanks 

Jun 25, 2019 02:32 AM #10
Lawrence "Larry" & Sheila Agranoff. Cell: 631-805-4400
The Top Team @ Charles Rutenberg Realty 255 Executive Dr, Plainview NY 11803 - Plainview, NY
Long Island Home and Condo Specialists

Oh #6 rings true. Having the patience for those who may take longer to express themselves - Listening first can get you further in your goals...

Jun 25, 2019 07:29 AM #11
Joan Cox
House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373 - Denver, CO
Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time

Sally, great choice for a reblog, and Grant nailed this one again!  Just shut up and listen! 

Jun 25, 2019 11:46 AM #12
Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl
Samsel & Associates - Clark, NJ
The Last Names You'll Ever Need in Real Estate

Grant is an excellent resource for great information on communication. Thanks for reposting it!

Jun 26, 2019 05:37 AM #13
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Sally K. & David L. Hanson

WI Realtors - Luxury - Divorce
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