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Have you trapped yourself in a box of your own making?

By
Services for Real Estate Pros with John Henry Masterworks Design International, Inc. 13013

How many weeks, months, years, must go by when you realize you have sheltered yourself in a self-constructed box that has:

  1. Limited your reach
  2. Limited your visibility
  3. Limited your availability
  4. Limited your goals
  5. Limited your potential
  6. Limited your income
  7. Limited your future

It is a scary realization.  We ponder, sometimes too little, on things that affect us the most.  We do that because we are scared to take that one step that moves us out of a self-constructed milieu, a world that is small but somewhat comfortable, but painful and scary at times.  Is your world built on anxiety and just-in-time business dealings?  Is your environment one in which every day you shrug your shoulders thinking: "well that's it.  that's the way it is. I can't really do anything about it".  WRONG

You CAN do something about it.  Realizing you have methodically built a make-believe world that limits your potential is the first step on GETTING OUT OF THE TRAP.

Like the mythical frog in a pan who can't tell when the temperature has brought him to boiling point and is done for, we can build our own trap with the same consequences.

The box that YOU have built has been fastened with the following deadly nails:

  1. Ignorance
  2. Little self-esteem
  3. Lack of motivation
  4. Belief in your previous success and methodology
  5. Pride

Have you neglected to stay aware of your business environment, the 'market', your competitors, the thing that is taking the market by storm and that you have failed on which to capitalize?  

Are you timid about moving forward and admitting that you need to possibly educate yourself, even a little, so that you can stay on top of the 'game'?  What is making you apprehensive about succeeding beyond the few milestones you have achieved?

Have you lost the drive to make things better for yourself?  Are you in a state of denial because everything YOU thought needed to be done was accomplished already or some kind of insurmountable roadblock prevented you from realizing your goals?

Are you still taking 'baby steps'?  What are you waiting for??

Are you relying on the methods taken at first to achieve a modicum of success and keep going down the same path?  The ways of business change rapidly and what worked once, even well, may not work now at all?  How long will you wait until you must do something different?

I think pride and self-delusion is probably the most caustic block to breaking out of a deadly box built of your own mindset and custom.  'I have been doing it like this for years'.  Well, what about now?  'It used to work great for me but it just needs a bit of time and fixin' to get back to what was a great deal for me'.  Sorry, you are late and others are leapfrogging in front of you.  Beware you are not lost in the dust of others' simple openmindedness.

Have you been relying 100% on technology to solve your problems?  Have you lost the 'human touch'?  Are your systems up to date?  Check on what your winning competition is doing.  Find out what they are promoting, selling, negotiating, advertising, etc.  How is their branding compared to yours?  Are you using the same tools to stay out front?  If not, why not CHANGE YOUR WAYS to stay competitive?

And think about this: are your presumptions based on the best available information?  Perhaps you need to investigate other solutions to achieve goals that haven't seen the light of day recently...

PS: if you continue to do the same things over and over, methodically, purposefully, but achieve the same unintended results... you are driving another nail into your box.  You have achieved a definition of insanity.

PSS: if you accede to the PC culture, you may be limiting your ability to get out of your box.  Sometimes action must be taken that will 'offend' others' sensibilities.  This action may expose weaknesses in your system of doing things or working with certain people.  Tough decisions must be made because if everyone is holding hands singing kumbaya, not much of anything productive is getting done.  I say this in the kindest intentions but...Enough is Enough.

 

Comments (35)

Carol Williams
Although I'm retired, I love sharing my knowledge and learning from other real estate industry professionals. - Wenatchee, WA
Retired Agent / Broker / Prop. Mgr, Wenatchee, WA

Hi John,
Excellent post. One issue I didn't see you address is being affected by the negative attitude of other people... those saying "you can't" and so you are afraid to try for fear of them saying "I told you so".  Perhaps that falls under nail #2, Little self-esteem.  Thanks for the ponder worthy post.

Jul 22, 2019 12:10 PM
John Henry, Florida Architect
John Henry Masterworks Design International, Inc. - Orlando, FL
Residential Architect, Luxury Custom Home Design

Hello Carol, thou speakest of naysayers.  Ah yes.  I forgot about those folks.  It does affect self-esteem quite a bit.  And it will nail that box around you tighter!  Good point and thanks a bunch!!  Carol Williams 

Jul 22, 2019 02:04 PM
Sheila Anderson
Referral Group Incorporated - East Brunswick, NJ
The Real Estate Whisperer Who Listens 732-715-1133

Good evening John. You have done an excellent job with this. Procastination is dangerous.

Jul 22, 2019 02:38 PM
John Henry, Florida Architect

Hi Sheila, thank you.  Procrastination is difficult to break through.  We rationalize staying in the same ruts too often when we should 'break on through to the other side'!  Sheila Anderson 

Jul 22, 2019 07:52 PM
Anonymous
Beth Leath

Very good article and Twilight Zone reference.

Jul 22, 2019 06:12 PM
#19
Georgie Hunter R(S) 58089
Hawai'i Life Real Estate Brokers - Haiku, HI
Maui Real Estate sales and lifestyle info

Good one. I don’t remember this episode from TZ but love the show. Keep em coming!

Jul 22, 2019 06:15 PM
John Henry, Florida Architect

Nice to hear from you, Georgie.  Glad you enjoyed this post.  Sometimes we wake up and are determined to stay in our boxes and don't peek out.  TZ does some mind bending things don't they?
Georgie Hunter R(S) 58089 

Jul 22, 2019 07:57 PM
Wanda Kubat-Nerdin - Wanda Can!
Red Rock Real Estate (435) 632-9374 - St. George, UT
St. George Utah Area Residential Sales Agent

No dust underneath me and the last person who told me that 'you can't' was proven wrong. Still here and plan to be for many years to come! Congrats on the gold star John.

Jul 22, 2019 06:23 PM
John Henry, Florida Architect

Thank you, Wanda.   Fortunately, I don't have many naysayers in front of me.  We all have to muster up the courage every day to do what needs to be done but then try to forge new or innovative ways to stay ahead.  Tough to do. Wanda Kubat-Nerdin - Wanda Can! 

Jul 22, 2019 08:08 PM
Diana Dahlberg
1 Month Realty - Pleasant Prairie, WI
Real Estate in Kenosha, WI since 1994 262-308-3563

Great post and love that you used a Twighlight Zone episode ... I think I have seen every single one.  Not a good thing to set your own trap and box yourself in ... brings a new meaning to "think OUTSIDE the box" ... a Good Read for sure, John Henry 

Jul 22, 2019 09:30 PM
John Henry, Florida Architect

Thanks Diana Dahlberg 


Love the TZ stuff!  I think we sometimes wake up too late realizing how we've boxed ourselves into our own comfortable worlds!!  

Jul 23, 2019 08:44 AM
Rose Mary Justice
Synergy Realty Pros - Dandridge, TN
Synergy Realty Pros

Wonderful post and a reminder to think outside the box, to let our minds run free.  We have a choice to stay put or move forward.  

Jul 23, 2019 05:57 AM
John Henry, Florida Architect

I think we tend to wall ourselves into a comfort zone and don't realize our potential!  Thanks for your comment, Rose Mary Justice 

Jul 23, 2019 08:44 AM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Good morning John Henry - this is outstanding.  It is great to further ponder after talking about my slow moving change.  The bull frog example is really one that I like.

Jul 23, 2019 06:20 AM
John Henry, Florida Architect

Hi Grant, you wake up one day and you are the frog!!  Hopefully you still have some life left in you to make a smart decision to rebound!  Thanks, Grant Schneider 

Jul 23, 2019 08:45 AM
Mary Hutchison, SRES, ABR
Better Homes and Gardens Real Estate-Kansas City Homes - Kansas City, MO
Experienced Agent in Kansas City Metro area

Self talk, self expression, mindset--all so important, especially as we age.  I always try and take the positive attitude!

Jul 23, 2019 12:46 PM
Paula Hathaway, REALTOR, LBA
Douglas Elliman Real Estate - Southampton, NY
...A Local Expert in all The Hamptons

Bravo John! What a great post--This is what it is all about, isn't it? To think differently is to wither away and to let your life fade into nothingness. The mind is incredible when you think about it. It is impossible to tell yourself that you will be successful and then become successful! You must BE the success in the now or else you will have failed....Same with wealth, same with happiness and other states of well-being. You will never be that which you strive to be unless you are able to "see" it as real, now. "Realizing you have methodically built a make-believe world that limits your potential is the first step on GETTING OUT OF THE TRAP" was perhaps my favorite of all your wizardry! Now, take that and turn it into: Realizing that you have methodically built a make-believe world that has expanded your potential in all ways! This is the way things work. I love this post! You have constructed a work of art. No one can unknowingly go forward after reading it without experiencing the fact that unless you take it all on, keeping a clear INTENT with what you want to be as you lean in, you will again come up with nothing. You have said it with such conviction and force that one would be blind and deaf not to hear/see it!

Jul 23, 2019 01:57 PM
Bruce Hicks
Best Homes Hawaii - Honolulu, HI
Your Best Hawaii Realtor!

A great article John Henry , it goes along with Mike Cooper's article , sometimes, You just gotta ROLL with it! I have a client who purchased 2 hollow tile 3 bedrooms in Orlando 2 years ago for less than 100k!

Jul 24, 2019 11:34 AM
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

Hi John- well done!!!! And so happy that it was featured!  I have a good friend who built her own box and when we were talking she said "I can't get out of my own way."  Loved the Twilight Zone clip and I do attribute the TZ to many of my nightmares growing up. 

Jul 27, 2019 10:30 AM
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

                                      

                                                 Thank you, John.

Jul 27, 2019 06:45 PM
John Henry, Florida Architect

Hi Kathy, thanks a bunch for having this featured in your blog.  This was my first TZ nightmare.  Never forgot it. 


I think we get in our own way and don't give ourselves enough credit for getting to the next step upwards. 


Thanks, Kathy Streib 

Jul 28, 2019 09:10 AM
Debb Janes
Nature As Neighbors - Camas, WA
Put My Love of Nature At Work for You

What a great post John. I truly love everything about it, super message and reality check for many. And as a fan of the old Twilight Zone series, I can't wait to take a look at the clip. Have a wonderful day.  D 

Jul 28, 2019 07:04 AM
Kristin Johnston - REALTOR®
RE/MAX Platinum - Waukesha, WI
Giving Back With Each Home Sold!

Great post! I can see why Kathy chose to highlight it this week!

Jul 28, 2019 07:53 AM
Dorie Dillard Austin TX
Coldwell Banker Realty ~ 512.750.6899 - Austin, TX
NW Austin ~ Canyon Creek and Spicewood/Balcones

Good morning John Henry ,

Love this post! I'm so glad that Kathy Streib featured your post in her "Ah-Ha" moments for the week and you received a well deserved gold star! A great message for everyone to ponder. Love the Twilight clip! Perfect choice!

Jul 28, 2019 09:34 AM
Laura Cerrano
Feng Shui Manhattan Long Island - Locust Valley, NY
Certified Feng Shui Expert, Speaker & Researcher

, Looking back, there was a lot of little things and fears that were holding me back that I’ve let go of.

Jul 28, 2019 09:31 PM
Lise Howe
Keller Williams Capital Properties - Washington, DC
Assoc. Broker in DC, MD, VA and attorney in DC

Congratulations on your well deserved feature - I know that I let myself get into a box and then I need to lift my vision and get moving

Jul 30, 2019 05:02 AM
MichelleCherie Carr Crowe .Just Call. 408-252-8900
Get Results Team...Just Call (408) 252-8900! . DRE #00901962 . Licensed to Sell since 1985 . Altas Realty - San Jose, CA
Family Helping Families Buy & Sell Homes 40+ Years

Thank you for the encouraging words here in this featured work, John Henry. 

Aug 06, 2019 01:13 PM