On Reciprocity

By
Industry Observer CalBRE #01165532

 

On Reciprocity

 

On Reciprocity

 

On Reciprocity The word and the concept has me thinking.  Once again.  It's a word and a concept that I have known for a long time.  I distinctly recall hearing about it again when joining ActiveRain.

 

The importance of reciprocity.  The why.  The whens and the hows.  Much of those early days in this forum are but a mere blur.  I may not always or consistently fully practice reciprocity here.   But there it is and as light bulb moments often do it takes on so many definitions when it comes to this forum.  I digress.  Off onto a tangent.  Anyway. 

 

Reciprocity certainly has plenty of real life implications.  Maybe it goes back to long ago far before AR.  I remember hearing about the importance of the golden rule as a very young child.  Do unto others...  In the real world too.  Do not ask what your country can do for you...  If you think about it you likely can think of many more examples.   My wondering led me once again on a search for additional thoughts and I found many.  This particular quote stood out and I stopped.  I read it twice.  And then again.  I like it.  It fits.  For me.  Right now.

 

Neuroscientists talk a lot about brain circuits.

In fact, the word 'circuit' is probably misleading. 

We do not know where most circuits begin and end. 

And unlike an electrical circuit,

brain connections are heavily reciprocal and recursive,

so that's a direction of information flow that can be inferred

but sometimes not proven. 

                                                                                                   Thomas R Insel  

 

 

 

The image in this post is from canstockphoto.com.

 

 

 

 

On Reciprocity

 

 

Posted by

Michael Jacobs

 

CalBRE # 01165532

2065 Huntington Drive

P. O. Box 587

Pasadena, CA 91102

Call/Text:  818.516.4393

mtj916@gmail.com

 

 

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Tags:
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Rainmaker
1,303,876
Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl
Samsel & Associates - Clark, NJ
The Last Names You'll Ever Need in Real Estate

Interesting analogy. Certainly reciprocity is great, but it can't be the reason we do great things for other people.

Aug 05, 2019 06:55 AM #22
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Roy Kelley - that is certainly true.  You are certainly an example of reciprocity in ActiveRain.  

Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl - doing the right thing on a consistent basis is part of a good routine.  

Aug 05, 2019 10:39 AM #23
Rainmaker
5,381,325
Roy Kelley
Realty Group Referrals - Gaithersburg, MD

Good Monday afternoon, Michael.

Have a great day and an outstanding week

Aug 05, 2019 10:41 AM #24
Rainmaker
2,018,738
Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP
DFW FINE PROPERTIES - Southlake, TX
Selling Homes Changing Lives

Hi Michael Jacobs - I am an avid reader of Harvard Business Review. Here's something to ponder that I found worth reading:

"Researchers Wayne E. Baker, a professor at the Ross School of Business at the University of Michigan, and Innovation Places’ Nathaniel Bulkley focus in on two common types of generalized reciprocity: paying it forward and rewarding reputation. Paying it forward, they write, means that people’s motivations are driven by “positive affect: ‘You help me, and I feel grateful, so I pay it forward by helping a third party.”

I like that statement because it's something I can relate to. Here on AR we have had many challenges for "Paying it Forward," especially during the holidays, i.e., the month of November. I find that many people are nicer at Thanksgiving than Christmas or other times of the year. 

In reading those AR entries about "Paying it Forward," I found a few stories that I thought were very believable. I also found many that I thought were submitted just for the sake of getting points or to make an impression. Perhaps, the stories I read that I was skeptical of were true, but, I'll never know.

Credibility is serious business and I really do believe there are many people who pay it forward with heart and soul and do what they do, not for the glory, but because that is how they are and they don't feel the need to boast about it either. 

That's my 2 cents and 5 paragraphs worth. 

Aug 05, 2019 03:05 PM #25
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP - as usual your thoughtful comments has me pondering further.  I especially like your use of the word "credibility".  The word that comes to mind is a similar one:  "genuineness" .  Primarily of the person but also of the "act" and the "concept".  Your thoughts on the Pay It Forward concept whether that be ActiveRain or in real life gives me additional pause.  For additional pausing...and yes, pondering.  

Aug 05, 2019 03:27 PM #26
Rainmaker
2,018,738
Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP
DFW FINE PROPERTIES - Southlake, TX
Selling Homes Changing Lives

Michael Jacobs - Ponder on! Our "brains" need to be stimulated with new thoughts and ideas. Have you noticed, people who really are credible are always at the top of their game and failure just makes them stronger? Their credibility is built on authenticity providing the highest quality of services. 

This is a GREAT post!!!

Aug 05, 2019 03:37 PM #27
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP - thank you for the comment and as always the inspiration to ponder and to wonder.  Now about failure and the ability to make ourselves stronger...

Aug 05, 2019 03:58 PM #28
Rainmaker
1,218,057
Sheri Sperry - MCNE®
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage - Sedona, AZ
(928) 274-7355 ~ YOUR Solutions REALTOR®

Hi Michael Jacobs,

Everyone is really doing some heavy pondering... The first thing I thought of was being able to display reciprocal listings from my local MLS!  

As for reciprocal behavior, I just always try to do the right thing and don't look at it as if I need to reciprocate. 

Aug 05, 2019 04:16 PM #29
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Sheri Sperry - MCNE® - "reciprocal" definitely brings a different meaning to the word, doesn't it?  Reciprocity has changed the world of real estate in recent years.  Personally, if people are doing the right thing as you said, things are headed in the right direction.  

Aug 05, 2019 04:37 PM #30
Rainmaker
4,080,841
Joan Cox
House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373 - Denver, CO
Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time

Michael, you were truly pondering, and reciprocity here in the Rain is good, but cannot always.

Aug 06, 2019 06:38 AM #31
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Sheri Sperry - MCNE® - in real estate, reciprocity has taken on a new definition recently with the expansion of multiple listing systems and technology.  What's next?  It should be interesting.

Joan Cox - understandably time is an issue for many.  

Aug 06, 2019 06:44 AM #32
Rainmaker
1,498,504
Beth Atalay
Cam Realty and Property Management - Clermont, FL
Cam Realty of Clermont FL

Hi Michael Jacobs, we should do things for others because that's who we are, no expectations. However, just because we should, doesn't mean we do. I've come to the realization that I can not expect anything from others so I just keep on doing what I think is right. Whether the other person recognized or not.

Aug 06, 2019 08:55 AM #33
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Beth Atalay - that's the right way to be, in my opinion.  Even when others may or may understand the philosophy there are plenty of people who "get it".  

Aug 06, 2019 09:05 AM #34
Ambassador
3,314,887
Debe Maxwell, CRS
www.iCharlotteHomes.com | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
Charlotte Homes for Sale - Charlotte Neighborhoods

Love this and it really does exemplify The Golden Rule behavior - as we all should, Michael.

I'm also of the mindset to pay-it-forward - I find myself spending too much time reaching out to 'newbies' or people who receive few comments to try to boost the community and realize that I totally missed comments on my posts and reciprocating back to others who did comment. 

It's tough to reciprocate AND pay-it-forward. I wish there was a good balance here but, there's just not! We used to have a whole group who would reach out to newbies and continue to follow them for several months but, now, there may be one other person who does that. I feel like we could all do better at both (reciprocity & paying it forward) - especially me! 

Aug 06, 2019 06:57 PM #35
Ambassador
3,314,887
Debe Maxwell, CRS
www.iCharlotteHomes.com | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
Charlotte Homes for Sale - Charlotte Neighborhoods

OH and I didn't mention the newbies that I personally invited to join the fun here in the Rain...hard as I try, I can't get more than a couple to stick around! LOL

Aug 06, 2019 06:58 PM #36
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Debe Maxwell, CRS - reciprocity whether here on ActiveRain or in the real world is not always easy but we have heard(or at least I have) nothing worthwhile is necessarily easy.  It takes effort to reciprocate.  As it does to pay it forward.  Both have benefits for the person who gives as well as receives....

 

As for AR personal invitations I have only one "invitation"  that was accepted and that person wrote one post before vanishing like others who didn't see the benefit.  That's okay.  This forum is not for everyone.  

Aug 06, 2019 07:08 PM #37
Ambassador
3,314,887
Debe Maxwell, CRS
www.iCharlotteHomes.com | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
Charlotte Homes for Sale - Charlotte Neighborhoods

It's not, I totally agree, Michael! Some do try and I've had a couple stick to it but, gosh, I wish more would see the benefits so more than 30 or 40 members were here every day. 

Aug 06, 2019 07:22 PM #38
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Debe Maxwell, CRS - I think the membership of ActiveRain is comprised of many types including those who may be viewed as "active",  some who log in daily or on a semi-regular basis to interact or not to interact(the serial posters), others who participate on an irregular/inconsistent basis and still others who read posts or questions yet we may never "hear" from them.  Just my two cents...which is likely putting on a higher price tag for my opinion than the real market value 

Aug 06, 2019 07:37 PM #39
Rainmaker
55,637
Kris Collis, Associate Broker
Smart Way America Realty - East Stroudsburg, PA
Professional Results you Expect 570-507-7510

Michael, synchronicity finding your post today.  Just this week a member commented about unfollowing someone who did not reciprocate. The light went off, the entire AR blog/post/comment structure made sense.  It's all based on the foundation of reciprocity.  

We don't have the typical FAQs here like other sites, but if we did, the principle of reciprocity should be in there....with definition, explanation and  examples.  As I'm finding more and more, AR culture in many good ways is a big cut above the rest.  The challenge is not having everything in one place.  Newcomers find things out hit or miss over time without FAQs (which for us is the Group, Ask an Ambassador.)  On the other hand, when the student is ready the teacher will come.  This was my week to see more clearly the reciprocity principle at work here and why it's so important.  And no doubt why I discovered your post.

Sep 07, 2019 09:29 PM #40
Rainmaker
3,333,988
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Kris Collis - thank you for the comment.  Lots of insight.  ActiveRain has been a bit of a maze at times with information available but not always "there" when we need it.   Have you seen this section?  Getting Started on AR  There are clues of all sorts around this forum and after nearly ten years here, I still find some. We each find the clues in our own way and in our time it seems.  Good luck.  

Sep 08, 2019 03:59 AM #41
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