Play to Improve and WIN more

Real Estate Broker/Owner with Pareto Realty TN #251071

Is playing to win a short-sighted strategy?

When we always focus on the WIN, we’re subjecting ourselves to the probability of many disappointments over time. This “WIN or BUST” mindset creates conditions ripe for “Roller-Coaster Performance”.

When we win, we are high on life . . . When we lose, we are “defeated”.

Of course, winning is more enjoyable for most non-masochists.

Being defeated seldom feels good and indubitable tosses into the grief cycle (Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance).

Isn’t it exhausting to ride this roller-coaster of extreme highs (WINS) plummeting to devastating lows (losses) when the only “acceptable” outcome is a WIN?

So . . . ALL of the eggs are in the WIN basket, and there are no excuses for losing, because when we lose, we are “LOSERS”.

Who wants to be a loser?

A slight shift in mentality might fix this enigma.

If we were to adopt a mindset of Playing to improve, odds (frequency) of winning would also improve, and we can enjoy the satisfaction of know that “we did our best – better than the game before.

Miracles start happening when a team adopts this mindset.

Just as pot of boiling water transitions from chaotic (violent) boiling to a smooth “rolling boil”, so do elite performers who are on this path being the best we can be in every contest . . . I call this “Rolling Boil” . . . Flow!

A team in Flow is a formidable force.

Momentum builds as skill, talent, training, strategies converge, all of the players play as one supremely integrated force projected onto the field of play.

We all like to win!

What I am suggesting here is that you’re likely to win more frequently when you are playing to improve.

Psst . . . I believe the most toxic and destructive element of any team is focus on individual player performance. You’re either a team or a gaggle of individual performers . . . Teams in flow win more!

The Pareto Realty Vital Few are a team of elite Real Estate Sales Professionals in Middle Tennessee. Every day, we focus on “better than before” which results in “as one of us succeeds, we all succeed.”

I’m proud of our little band of home selling gypsies 

Published by Barry Owen

Strategist-CEO of Pareto Realty Real estate sales Professional Inviter-Facilitator-Practicer of Open Space Technology Opening safe space for people & organizations to self-organize around issues & opportunities BarryOwen.US Invite-Listen-Love

Posted by

Barry Owen

Principal Broker
Pareto Realty
Nashville, TN

Call me: 615-568-2123
email me:




Simply & BOLDLY Living the FourFold Way in Open Space!

Quintessentially connected to the real estate industry to offer the ultimate experience for Home Buyers and Sellers in Middle Tennessee . . . Inquire within!

Comments (7)

Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

I think you may be on to something about playing to improve rather than playing to win.  I'm learning Spanish via Duolingo.  They have a points system.  And, recently, I found I became more focused on points than actually progressing throught he lessons.  I had to readjust my thinking in order to move on.

Aug 29, 2019 11:07 PM
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Hi Barry- you make a good point. (even though Coach Herm Edwards says you play to win the game) If you play to be the best you can and to constantly improve what you're doing, you will win. 

Aug 30, 2019 06:12 PM
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224


                                Thanks, Barry.

Aug 31, 2019 07:03 PM
Barbara Todaro
RE/MAX Executive Realty - Retired - Franklin, MA
Previously Affiliated with The Todaro Team

Good morning, Barry Owen I think every time one plays, they are improving in some way and most don't realize it....practice make "winning" possible..... no one is perfect... keeping your head in the game allows us to put the pieces together much easier than if we shut it off and then turned it on... just stay alert and keep your head in the game.

Sep 01, 2019 05:28 AM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Good morning Barry Owen - the mindset is so important to the outcome.  Believe and then execute and win.

Sep 01, 2019 06:16 AM
Kristin Johnston - REALTOR®
RE/MAX Realty Center - Waukesha, WI
Giving Back With Each Home Sold!

I like the line about winning more when we plan to improve....well stated!

Sep 01, 2019 07:44 AM
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

Playing to improve.

That is awesome. A new mindset for me. Thank you!

Sep 02, 2019 08:21 AM

What's the reason you're reporting this blog entry?

Are you sure you want to report this blog entry as spam?