Not About Real Estate

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 311291
https://activerain.com/droplet/5mqt

Not About Real Estate Margaret Rome 

 

I recently extended an invite to the Widow's Group.

It was a hard word to say, and it bothered me.

My idea…change the name! From the first time I heard myself referred to as Lee Rome's widow, it was not a word that I chose to be labeled. I resented it, avoided it, cringed with the sound and could not check a box that said, widow.

My Lee died in 2014, over five and a half years ago, a tremendous life-altering change!  

Being so thankful for what we had together, and not what I lost, has gotten me through all these years.

 

My distaste of the word was not helping to accept the situation until I realized the word widow, identified only my status and not my person.

Margaret Rome is the widow of Lee Rome but, so much more!  Instead of just hating the word, maybe change the way I react to the concept.

Very proud to have found my Lee, my love, my life.

As quoted in my book, "I made a wish and you came true."  

We went together for two years and then were married for 16,802 days. What we had was so good we counted each day. For those trying to do the math…almost forty-seven years! So proud to be his wife, his lover, his partner, his best friend, mother to his child, and his widow.

Yes, I am going to try and be proud to say that word because I loved my Lee Rome! I still love Lee Rome, and I am Lee Rome's widow!

The word is not bad…it is the way we think of the word.

I am so proud to have loved so deeply and been loved so completely.  I think I can even accept the word…only a word! Yep, I am a widow!

And I am a member of a widows group!

 

This is not about real estate but, 

 

If you are thinking of selling a home

Call Margaret Rome

 

Margaret Rome

 

 

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Show All Comments
Rainmaker
1,597,192
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

A beautiful post. You are right about words. They can convey meanings or feelings we don't necessarily agree with. You had a wonderful 47 years of marriage. That love story continues to this day. 

Feb 28, 2020 06:09 AM #7
Rainmaker
899,995
Norma J. Elkins
Elite Realty Group - Morristown, TN
Realtor - Elkins Home Selling Team

What an awesome new perspective on the word.  Hold on to that love and you will make it just fine and be proud to be called his widow.  Such a feel good blog to read this morning.  Thanks for sharing!

Feb 28, 2020 06:12 AM #8
Rainmaker
3,835,892
Sheila Anderson
Referral Group Incorporated - East Brunswick, NJ
The Real Estate Whisperer Who Listens 732-715-1133

Good morning Margaret. I think you are right, you are more that the wife of someone who died. You were complete but are still whole.

Feb 28, 2020 08:58 AM #9
Ambassador
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Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Sheila Anderson That's a good way to look at it. Thank you.

Feb 28, 2020 11:10 AM #10
Rainmaker
2,784,157
Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

"I made a wish and you came true."  That's a beautiful sentence, Margaret!

Feb 28, 2020 01:09 PM #11
Rainmaker
2,784,157
Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

I also want to say I agree with Sheila Anderson in her comment  "You are more than the wife of someone who died."  It is important to remember that.  I have friends who lost husbands, who didn't accept that.  Some of them in their haste to remarry and carry on the only role they understood - being a wife, made horrible choices in that next marriage.  It didn't always end well.

Feb 28, 2020 01:12 PM #12
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Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Margaret- I couldn't agree more.  I feel somewhat that way when in the news, people refer to just about anyone over 60 as an "elderly" person. Good grief!!! I'm not that. 

You and Lee have (because you still have that feeling in your heart) what many would love to have had in their lifetime. You are who you are and being Lee Rome's wife is a part (large though it may be) of who you are. 

Feb 28, 2020 03:33 PM #13
Ambassador
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Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Kathy Streib Lovely words! 

note: when we were all younger, we used to refer to people our age as old. You do have to smile at that. 

Feb 28, 2020 03:48 PM #14
Anonymous
El

Beautifully written, Mar! You are doing exactly what Lee would want; smile, open your heart, and go on..

Feb 29, 2020 01:22 PM #15
Ambassador
4,269,710
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Feb 29, 2020 05:57 PM #16
Ambassador
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Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Kathy Streib Thank you so much. I look forward to your group each week!

Feb 29, 2020 06:26 PM #17
Rainmaker
1,484,921
Carol Williams
Although I'm retired, I love sharing my knowledge and learning from other real estate industry professionals. - Wenatchee, WA
Retired Agent / Broker / Property Manager

Hi Margaret,
I sooo relate to this post.  When I was applying for my spousal benefits after my Max passed away, one of the questions was "How did the marriage end?"  I immediately broke out in tears because I never considered my marriage to have ended.  I still don't. What we had was wonderful and will last into eternity. A true blessing.  And, here we are... carrying on with them still in our hearts. 

Mar 01, 2020 07:23 AM #18
Ambassador
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Debb Janes EcoBroker and Bernie Stea JD
ViewHomes of Clark County - Nature As Neighbors - Camas, WA
REALTORS® in Clark County, WA

Aw, Margaret. What a beautiful, beautiful tribute to love and Lee, and life partners in marriage. What a gift to share this kind of friendship and devotion. Sadly, not everyone experiences it. Lucky you. 

Mar 01, 2020 07:38 AM #19
Rainmaker
2,185,198
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

You have a wonderful attitude Margaret! This post will be helpful to many people on many different levels.

Mar 01, 2020 07:50 AM #20
Rainmaker
5,900,479
Roy Kelley
Realty Group Referrals - Gaithersburg, MD

Thank you very much, Margaret, for sharing your perspective. You message will be helpful for others.

Treasure your special memories.

Mar 01, 2020 09:17 AM #21
Rainmaker
1,132,218
Margaret Goss
Baird & Warner Real Estate - Winnetka, IL
Chicago's North Shore & Winnetka Real Estate

Forty-seven years of a loving and beautiful relationship gives you the RIGHT to be called his widow! I'm happy you're wearing it proudly now.

Mar 01, 2020 11:48 AM #22
Rainmaker
1,059,874
June Piper-Brandon
Houwzer Inc - Baltimore, MD
Piecing Dreams One Home at a Time

Margaret, what a great blog.  I have struggled these past few years since Skip died, faultered, lost my step, lost my way and am trying really hard to pull myself up by my bootstraps and get back to what I love.  Thanks for giving me words of wisdom...

Mar 01, 2020 05:56 PM #23
Rainmaker
122,684
Kris Collis, Associate Broker
Smart Way America Realty - East Stroudsburg, PA
Professional Results you Expect 702-574-8102

Margaret Rome, Baltimore MarylandYou just lifted the fog from the word, widow.  What a lovely, uplifting, memorable point of view full of wisdom for yourself and all who read your post.  

Mar 01, 2020 09:47 PM #24
Rainmaker
1,019,424
Jan Green
Value Added Service, 602-620-2699 - Scottsdale, AZ
HomeSmart Elite Group, REALTOR®, EcoBroker, GREEN

Margaret, thank you so much for sharing your story.  I went back and read your other post as well.  You are VERY LUCKY to have met someone so perfect for you.  That doesn't happen every day.  Believe me, after searching now for 20 years, I want what you had and wont settle for less.  Maybe you can make up another word for Widow - Cheermeister!  That suits you!

Mar 03, 2020 11:56 AM #25
Ambassador
882,157
Mimi Foster
Falcon Property Solutions - Colorado Springs, CO
Voted Colorado Springs Best Realtor

Beautiful sentiments, Margaret. I am sincerely glad you had such a loving relationship. I have been blessed with my perfect human. I hope you find comfort with others who have had to learn a new way of living.

Mar 03, 2020 06:19 PM #26
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