Inviting conversation

Real Estate Broker/Owner with Pareto Realty TN #251071

Inviting conversation

In your daily interactions, how many of the words you speak are inviting conversation?

Monologue or Dialogue?

Do you tend to talk TO – AT – or WITH most other people?

Do you find yourself conversing differently with different people?

For those people you talk TO or AT, why not WITH?

Are some people not deserving of engaged interpersonal communication?

Are they “less” in some way?

Is the differentiation due to Status or perceived “worthiness” relative to knowledge or expertise of the topic of discussion?

Is it possible that ALL people have worthy insight in conversations in which they chose to participate . . . because they have enough passion for the topic to show up, be present, and claim their voice?

Sure! Some folks’ speech is less than eloquent with limited vocabulary and a seemingly clunky dialect.

How much richer might our human experiences be if we were to abstain from judgement of “presentation” based on first impression?

Give this a try . . . Invite more people every day to engage in conversation WITH them regarding any topic of interest.

Slow down and pay close attention.

Savor the unexpected wisdom that you have the great fortune and Honor to discover.

Published by Barry Owen 

Strategist-CEO of Pareto Realty Real estate sales Professional Inviter-Facilitator-Practicer of Open Space Technology Opening safe space for people & organizations to self-organize around issues & opportunities BarryOwen.US Invite-Listen-Love 

Posted by

Barry Owen

Principal Broker
Pareto Realty
Nashville, TN

Call me: 615-568-2123
email me:




Simply & BOLDLY Living the FourFold Way in Open Space!

Quintessentially connected to the real estate industry to offer the ultimate experience for Home Buyers and Sellers in Middle Tennessee . . . Inquire within!

Comments (23)

Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543
Long & Foster Real Estate Inc 610-225-7400 - Devon, PA
Tredyffrin Easttown Realtor, Philly Main Line

The hardest part of conversation is listening without preparing our response to what is being said. Litterally just listening and thinking about what is being said. I read something recently about placing your fingers on your lips when listening to encourage you not to speak but to truly listen. Have been trying it and found it does help.

Nov 20, 2019 09:56 AM
Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

"Do you tend to talk TO – AT – or WITH most other people?"  That's an important question that folks should ponder (to use Michael Jacobs term).

Nov 20, 2019 01:50 PM
Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

CONGRATULATIONS Barry, on having this blog FEATURED in the Old Farts Club group!  

Nov 20, 2019 01:54 PM
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Love this Barry and I also love what Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543 said. So often we are thinking about how we're going to respond to what a person is saying while they're saying it. We need to learn how to stop and listen without any judgments. 

Nov 20, 2019 07:44 PM
Laura Cerrano
Feng Shui Manhattan Long Island - Locust Valley, NY
Certified Feng Shui Expert, Speaker & Researcher

Sometimes you just need to talk to the person next to you as if they matter because they do.

Nov 20, 2019 11:55 PM
Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

I am curious about all those "ANONYMOUS" comments above.  I've been seeing them on other blog posts here on AR also.  What is the purpose of those who post names with letters and numbers, accompanied by a comment of letters and numbers?

Nov 21, 2019 08:33 AM
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224


                                        Thank you, Barry. 

Nov 23, 2019 06:42 PM
Barry Owen

Thank YOU Kathy Streib 

Nov 24, 2019 06:23 AM
Sheila Anderson
Referral Group Incorporated - East Brunswick, NJ
The Real Estate Whisperer Who Listens 732-715-1133

Good morning Barry. It is always about taliking with and not to people.

Nov 24, 2019 07:53 AM
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667,, Broker, eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
Helping your Montana dreams take root

Speak with people is the only way to have real conversations.

Nov 24, 2019 08:10 AM
Dorie Dillard Austin TX
Coldwell Banker Realty ~ 512.750.6899 - Austin, TX
NW Austin ~ Canyon Creek and Spicewood/Balcones

Good morning Barry Owen ,

So important to listen when communicating with others. It's amazing the wisdom you can receive if you really listen and engage.

Nov 24, 2019 09:29 AM
Francine Viola
Coldwell Banker Evergreen Olympic Realty, Olympia WA - Olympia, WA
REALTOR®, In Tune with your Real Estate Needs

It feels like listening has become a lost art.  Communication in general has become a lost art.  My hope is we can all better hone our messages and receive them just well.

Nov 24, 2019 09:34 AM
Anna Banana Kruchten CRS, CRB, Phoenix Broker
HomeSmart Real Estate BR030809000 - Phoenix, AZ

Hi Barry my first thought when I started to read this post - was geez talk with people. You've covered it really well! Talking with is genuine and it's about 2 people connecting not just one talking and not listening to the other.

Nov 24, 2019 11:21 AM
MichelleCherie Carr Crowe Just Call...408-252-8900
Get Results Team...Just Call (408) 252-8900! . DRE #00901962 . Licensed to Sell since 1985 . Altas Realty - San Jose, CA
Family Helping Families Buy & Sell Homes 40+ Years

Too many folks talk only to hear themselves rather than listen and learn.

Nov 24, 2019 06:23 PM
Charita Cadenhead
eXp Realty - Birmingham, AL
Serving Jefferson and Shelby Counties (Alabama)

Talk less.  Listen more. The mantra of the day.  It seems like conversations, true conversations, are a lost art of sorts.  Everyone wants to talk and nobody wants to listen. Civil discourse is not always top of mind in many cases.  My way or the highway is the theme of the day.  Anytime I can engage in civil discourse is a good day.  Thanks for this much needed, thought provoking post.

Nov 26, 2019 07:08 AM
Barry Owen
Pareto Realty - Nashville, TN

Happy thanksgiving Charita Cadenhead 

Nov 26, 2019 09:32 AM
Tom Bailey
Margaret Rudd & Associates Inc. - Oak Island, NC

Barry, most of us listen to reply, we don't really pay attention to what other people say!!

Nov 26, 2019 11:56 AM
Mary Hutchison, SRES, ABR
Better Homes and Gardens Real Estate-Kansas City Homes - Kansas City, MO
Experienced Agent in Kansas City Metro area

Here's what I try to do...engage in a bit of small talk with those people who can have a monotonous job. For example, complimenting the check out clerk at the grocery store, or asking about someone's day at the coffee shop. Little things like that can make a small difference. I know that's not the point of this blog but wanted to mention it!

Dec 02, 2019 10:48 AM