On Listening and Journalism…

By
Real Estate Agent with www.iCharlotteHomes.com | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 228209

 On Listening and Journalism…

 

On Listening…

Compassion Listening 

I thought I would share a take-off on Mimi’s recently featured post, Can You Hear Me Now?’ Something that happened to me this week and yes, at 60, we can still have ah-ha moments!! In fact, I feel we’re never too old to capture those ah-ha moments.

 

We thought social media was a great thing until users stopped listening and began lashing out, hiding behind the safety of their keyboards. Users scream, demean and bully at every turn and it really does seem to be getting worse. Besides ‘unfriending’ and blocking the offenders, what are we to do to avoid the unnecessary drama that is in front of us 24/7?

 

On Listening and Journalism…


I have often commented that I feel journalism is a lost art. It seems we are faced, not with news but, with opinions - and some pretty strong ones too. I actually stopped watching the news for awhile because I couldn’t bear hearing the slant - either way - I just want the TRUTH, the FACTS and nothing more - certainly not the conjectures!

Truth or fiction
Being in real estate, we live in a world that truth matters, numbers (the RIGHT, factual ones) matter, honesty & integrity MATTER in all that we do. Sure, not all Realtors® abide by our Code of Ethics but, we are mandated to sit for those classes every couple of years. It’s up to US to listen and soak up the rules and regulations in our CoEs. Why don’t journalists have this same requirement in their profession?

 

I digress! The point in sharing all of that is this - I started watching the news again. My favorite part of the news is always the last ‘heartwarming’ story which makes me wish that news channels would realized that most people do enjoy hearing GOOD news, rather than twisted bad news!

 

I often work while the news is on or I’m cooking dinner at the same time. I don’t look at the TV, I merely LISTEN. I challenge you to try it. After years of doing this and resuming ‘watching’ (a.k.a. LISTENING), I noticed that my husband and I, being in the same room when the news is on, were left with a totally different interpretation of many of the news stories.

 

The best example happened recently and reading Mimi’s post, made me think, I really do need to share my challenge with the world!

Ray and I were watching the news - he WATCHING, while I was LISTENING (not even LOOKING at the TV). I could easily tell which political persuasion each speaker was and I could also HEAR the slant to which the questions were asked, based on the political persuasion of the questioner.  And, because of being able to listen to the question, the answers were interpreted differently than had I simply been watching the interviews. 

actively listening

We actually disagreed on what was said during a couple of stories and when we rewound the story and re-listened. There really is something to be said about the age-old belief that we have two ears and one mouth for a reason! In recent antics on social media, one could say the same thing about two eyes and mouth...but, I'm not going there! 

 

Mesmerizing EyesI think about what I do when talking to someone - I look at their eyes; if their eyes are striking, I think that their eyes are striking. I can also ’see’ deception that I don’t think everyone can ‘see’ when looking into the eyes of others. I look at their teeth — who doesn’t love a great smile?

 

So, I notice people’s teeth; if they are gleaming white and perfectly positioned, I think, “WOW! Now, that’s a beautiful smile!  Do you see where I’m going with this? When we WATCH, we are often distracted by the people, the background (“Oh, they’re in New York and it’s snowing there!”) OR we may be keenly aware of their body language. 

Great smile!
The point is
, we are seriously distracted when we watch. However, when we give all of our energy to hearing the conversation/interview and listening intently, I think we actually hear the REAL story. 

 

It takes a special person to actually HEAR and to even go beyond that - LISTEN. Listening to what others are saying is something most people simply don't to take the time to do. I have found that recently with my husband’s journey through a very serious illness. I know which medical practitioners are listeners and which are just giving you the fake smile and not hearing a word you’re saying. 

 

Perhaps they are not listening because they are smitten with my smile! LOL

 

Seriously, thank you for the inspiration for this post, Mimi Foster

© Debe Maxwell | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | CharlotteBroker@icloud.com | On Listening and Journalism…

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Debe Maxwell, CRS
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Having the body language is also beneficial, Jeff Dowler, CRS but, for me, it's almost always a confirmation of what I had heard when I was listening and then rewound!

Nov 28, 2019 09:24 PM #89
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I am blown away at the news listeners here - that makes me feel so normal, Mike Cooper, GRI!! And, I had to laugh - the beard! Our sons came home for Thanksgiving and one of them has a full-on beard! I will admit, he does look good with it...Ray, not so much!!

 

Fun family time!

Nov 28, 2019 09:27 PM #90
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Cute, Greg Mona! I don't 'have' to but, it's talking points that we're going to hear and sometimes it's good to be armed with counterpoints when the crazies bring up a view point in which I am in total disagreement! LOL

I love that - "I cannot recall how long ago it was when the news was simply reported and WE decided what it all meant." Don't you realize that we aren't capable of making those decisions?!! It's so frustrating and sadly, it's not frustrating to enough people because the masses continue to allow it...and participate fully too!

Listening to respond is a common malady - that's for sure! 

I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Nov 28, 2019 09:32 PM #91
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Oh my gosh, if the last 2 minutes of the news was the entire news, I'd stop what I was doing and sit there and watch! I LOVE THOSE STORIES!! Every day, it's my favorite part of the news.

Yes, me too, Tammy Lankford, and I stopped watching the news a while back but, always felt ike I was missing the talking topics on the days I was far too busy to read or listen to news. So, I started listening to it more on TV and boy, it's eye-opening (or should I say, ear-opening)?!!

 

Nov 28, 2019 09:35 PM #92
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Oh, thank you, Margaret Rome, Baltimore Maryland! I know you understand the frustration - they listen but, they don't really HEAR. I'm finally getting what he needs but, it took me over a month to get it. Hey, if they won't listen, we just have to keep repeating ourselves!

I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving, Margaret! 😘 

Nov 28, 2019 09:40 PM #93
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Thank you so much and, of course, I totally agree, Dorie Dillard CRS GRI ABR! Sadly, the busier we get with our businesses, the less time we have to do journalistic work for current event topics. It's so frustrating to me. I keep thinking that someone will get tired of the opinionews - not the news - and fire them all!  

Nov 28, 2019 09:43 PM #94
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Ahh, listening to respond - nope, not my way either, Bruce Walter! And, your point is exactly what I'm talking about - YES! Ray and I quite often come away from a story, thinking it was in a different direction than the other. We rewind and then 9 times out of 10, I win the debate!! LOL

And even the term 'debate' and 'debate team' have different meanings to some people, Bruce! I'd like to think that if you really ever did debate, you know that name-calling is not allowed. Basically calling people stupid or saying that they are libelous when they state facts in a debate, also is not proper etiquette when it comes to debate. Don't even get me started....or keep me going! LOL  

Nov 28, 2019 09:52 PM #95
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I LOVE your new word, Carol Williams and think it's perfect for Michael too!

I do hope you share where your pondertunity takes you, Carol! 

Nov 28, 2019 09:53 PM #96
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I agree, Roy Kelley! And, thank you! I hope you and Dolores had a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Nov 28, 2019 09:54 PM #97
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Thank you so much, Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP! Same to you and I do hope that you were able to spend some time with your children for the day.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Nov 28, 2019 09:55 PM #98
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Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours too, George Souto! As 90% of the holidays, family descends upon my home and I love every minute of it!

Nov 28, 2019 09:56 PM #99
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Endre Barath, Jr.
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wow Debe I am comment #100:)) Happy Thanksgiving, Endre

Nov 28, 2019 11:27 PM #100
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Thank you, Endre Barath, Jr. and a Happy Day-After Thanksgiving to you! Going to bed last night, I felt like today was going to be Sunday so, I'm also happy it's FRIDAY! ;-) 

Nov 29, 2019 06:30 AM #101
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Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl
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Very interesting post. I'd like to add that listening - really listening - is important when watching the "news" as well as in real life. We do so often get distracted by appearances that we forget to pay attention to the words.

Nov 29, 2019 06:40 AM #102
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Exactly, Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl - in fact, just like the example I cited with the medical team, we have to be advocates for those we love because those in medicine don't always hear the message we're trying to get across to them. Most often, it bears repeating - to the point of exhaustion sometimes!

Nov 29, 2019 02:29 PM #103
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Endre Barath, Jr.
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Debe funny you should say that, today was/is Saturday and it felt like Sunday to me until I  remembered to take Holly to the Vet:))Endre

Nov 30, 2019 10:09 PM #104
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Lisa Weiler
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I love the idea of encouraging more active listening.

Dec 01, 2019 03:50 PM #105
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Debe Maxwell, CRS
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Oh, I hope Holly's vet trip was just an annual check-up, Endre Barath, Jr.?  

Dec 03, 2019 06:16 AM #106
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Thank you, Lisa Weiler! We learn more about the other person when we do...and in our business, more about what our clients wants and needs are!

Dec 03, 2019 06:18 AM #107
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Kris Collis, Associate Broker
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Debe Maxwell, CRS Very provocative post in a good way.  Listening is so key in our industry.  As far as taking up listening to the news again, probably not in this lifetime, or as long as journalism remains censored.  The script readers and their scripts are largely designed to antagonize.  They are an insult to the profession of serious professionals.  Anyone who reports factually has been removed from the public arena.  

The script readers have duped themselves that their role is important because they face a national camera.  How do they live with themselves? How do they take themselves and their bombastic dribble seriously?  The answer is in the continuing drop of news ratings and the country that finds their fake news and agenda a waste of time.

The death of journalism has sparked one good thing, people are starting to read again.  Reading is the real news, it's self-education. Bill Gates came out with his recommended holiday reading list, it surprisingly for him has fiction titles!

Dec 14, 2019 04:26 AM #108
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