“Shelter in Place”
During this "shelter in place" I went to Walmart to buy a bag of food for my dog.
Already in line, a woman behind me asked me if I had a dog.
I thought to myself, "Really?" If you know me you know my sarcasm.
So on impulse I told her no, that I didn't have a dog, that I was starting the dog food diet again, and that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital the last time, but 15 pounds less! I told her that it was the perfect diet and that all you had to do is carry the kibbles in your pocket and eat one or two every time you feel hungry (I have to mention that practically everyone in line was interested in my story).
Frightened, the woman asks me if I ended up in the hospital because the dog food had poisoned me.
I answered, "Of course not! I was admitted because I bent down to smell the butt of a bulldog and I was hit by a truck."
I thought the man behind her was going to have a heart attack...he was laughing so hard!