I had a conversation with a woman once that was wanting to go on a date with me. She was trying to impress me with how much of an optimist she is. Funny thing was that she had no idea how negative she was. Really, she was.
You see, we need to be aware of how we ask for things. We need to be aware of the “rules” we have in our mind about the way things need to be. We need to all be careful in how we approach things. Are you saying what you DO want or what you DON'T want? I asked this woman what she liked. Her answer? She told me about 20 things she does NOT like. It's funny how just that one small difference can make a huge impact. If I did end up wanting to go out with her (and I know as attractive as she is there are HUNDREDS of guys that want to go out with her), I would know nothing about how to please her. Why? because all that would be on my mind is what she does NOT like. I would much rather tell you what I want as opposed to what I don't want on the off chance that you might give it to me. Think about it. If a client asks "What do you want me to do?" do you reply with "I don't want you to list this for $200,000 over market at a 2% commission" or do you reply with "I want you to list this 1% below market at a 7% commission." I'll ask for the latter just in case they might want to give me what I want.
As the old saying goes, “What you think about, you bring about”. If you are focused on what you want to avoid, you only end up drawing yourself closer to it. Focusing on the powerful positive outcome takes you closer to that direction. Then look as well at your beliefs and “rules” for how you want things to be. I helped a friend years ago discover how to find the man of her dreams (she is married with a child now). We looked at her belief structure because nobody ever told her the importance it has. If you want to see the sun RISE, don’t face West. Make sense?
She said she wanted a “take charge” kind of guy and then wondered why she kept finding the guys she was dating were controlling. DUH! They were taking charge. Examining your beliefs and stating them in the affirmative and positive makes a world of difference. If you are not getting the results you want, make small changes until you do get what you want. You may want to face East to see that sun RISE!
Being positive means stating things in the positive not the negative. I don't know about you, but I don't hang around with negative people. Oops – correct that. I want to only hang around with positive people.