Don't Take Things So Personally
I had a really rough week last week, I had a couple of sales fall through, through no fault of my own. I think I did everything correctly and followed through but in the end, they did not settle. One seller terminated the listing agreement and the other was reassigned. I had done everything possible to get these two sales to closing. But, in the end, the buyer of the first listing misstated his income in his mortgage application and when the mortgage company verified his income on the morning of closing he did not qualify and could not close and as a result, the second sale could not close either. I was so upset and I probably did take it personally. This morning I was reading a blog on another platform entitled "How to Not Take Things So Personally: 6 Helpful Habits".
The blog started with a couple of timely quotes: "Nobody can hurt me without my permission" Mahatma Ghandi and "Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't" Eleanor Roosevelt.
Then the author goes on to list 6 habits that he finds helpful.
1. Breathe - just focus on breathing in and out for a few minutes.
2. Get clarification - don't jump to conclusions based on what you may have just misunderstood and let that drag you down into feelings of anger and disappointment.
3. Realize everything isn't about you. It's very easy to fall into the trap of thinking that criticism or verbal attacks you receive are about you or something you did.
4. Talk it out. When something gets under your skin and you start to take I personally then you can really get stuck in a downward spiral. Talk it over with someone close to you and let your friend share their perspective.
5. Ask yourself: what is the lesson here?
6. Improve your self-esteem. One simple way to start improving your self-esteem is simply by being nice to people around you. How you treat others will often be reflected in how they treat you and others.
I quite often forget to breathe and get so wrapped up in the moment that it's hard to see the forest for the trees and to see a solution. I also walk away from the moment and get my emotions under control and then the resolution is clearer. At the end of the day, don't beat yourself up over it and try to see the lesson in the moment.
Comments (19)Subscribe to CommentsComment