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What Are You Trying to Say?

Industry Observer with Crochet Dreamz LLC

Miscommunication is the root of most conflicts. All too often when we try to communicate with others something goes astray. It can at times be quite challenging to know how to speak up for ourselves without seeming to be unpleasant or misunderstood. We often struggle as people to say what we mean or mean what we say. Even when we are asked a direct question we can be evasive with our answer when we don't want to hurt another's feelings. 


It's important to understand the emotion and intention behind a verbal exchange. As well a being able to clearly convey a message we need to hear what's actually being said and make the other person feel understood. Difficult discussions are never easy, but they can be managed with some basic understanding and simple techniques.


Asking For Help


Many of us at this difficult time are experiencing financial problems. So this may be one of those moments when we need to communicate effectively our need for help. Just thinking about having an awkward conversation like this can fill us with anxiety and trepidation. It's quite normal and natural to want to avoid it altogether. But asking for financial assistance from friends and family might just be our best option.


Planning and preparing a conversation can help us tone down any feelings of anxiety. If we explain our efforts so far e.g. cutting all unnecessary expenses, shopping on a budget, trying to get a second job – we're going to feel better about asking for help, especially if we've already devised a repayment plan or are able to offer something in return. It helps if we take time to gather our thoughts before we speak. Think about the point of the conversation we're going to have and what it is we hope to achieve.


When we're stressed or emotionally overwhelmed, we're more likely to send confusing messages. To avoid conflict and misunderstandings we need to calm down, avoid distractions and stay focused. Communicating effectively requires thinking through the delivery of the message we intend to convey as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.


Listening Well


Speaking clearly and using appropriate body language helps our message to be better received. It's also just as important to listen to what the other person is saying. By reflecting back or summarising their points, they will know that we are truly hearing their opinion and engaging with them respectfully. Effective communication is always about understanding the other person, not about winning an argument.


In many cases, how we say something can be just as important as what we say. It is salient to be approachable, polite, and engaging. Being respectfully assertive is a good attitude to adopt. It's vital we sharpen our approach skills and don't assume others are mind readers. All parties need to take full responsibility for clear and effective communication. If you consistently have difficulty communicating with another person then it might be a good idea to enlist the help of one or two others to help improve the situation. 


Effective communication is a skill we can all learn. With a little self-confidence and knowledge, we should all be able to get our point across or have those difficult discussions. If we try to be clear, concise, and relevant, validate other people's feelings and take time to think before we speak, we should reduce misunderstandings or conflicts and increase positive, helpful interactions.

Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Pasadena And Southern California 818.516.4393

Hello Shehnaaz - effective communication leads to better connections.  

Feb 24, 2021 06:21 PM
Number Cruncher LLC - Overton, NV
Helping Taxpayers Resolve IRS problems

I struggle with both, but asking for help the worst.  I am working on my listening skills.  I have ADD and my mind tends to jump all over the place.  I have to make myself focus on the person and what they are saying.

Thank you for sharing.  

Feb 24, 2021 06:45 PM