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Overcoming Your Blind Spots

By
Real Estate Agent with Keller Williams Realty 0575737

How many Psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb ?

- Just one. But the bulb has to really WANT to change.

Change is VERY HARD. Don't fool yourself in this area. With Realtors at our office, some video tape their listing presentation with a coach to evaluate their own nuances of their pitch. Do they mumble? Are they organized? Do they look professional? Do they have a smile in their voice?

If you have ever listened to presentations from alcoholics or members of their family where they have battled this affliction, all of them say you have to want to change as step one. If that never happens, NOTHING will change.

Blind Spot CarWhich brings me to the subject of BLIND SPOTS. In driving, those are those hidden areas you can't see with your mirrors. You literally have to put more effort into checking things out by turning your head around.

In life, we all have blind spots, either that we bury and refuse to believe or are unaware of. With the denial blind spots we have to grow to accept our limitations and flaws.

With what we are unaware of we need to grow with the help of friends and their observations about us. If 9 out of 10 people say you are loud and boorish, guess what? You just may be loud and boorish!!

The key to overcoming your blind spots is to interact with many people all the time. Then do some acute listening. Your world will bounce off the walls of their world. Then pay attention and take action to understand yourself and make some life mid course corrections.

We don't need to have blind spots. Turn around and listen to your friends. That's why they are called friends. I am convinced they are not there by coincidence. They are there to help you. I had a bad habit of interrupting people years ago before they finished talking which another salesperson pointed out to me. I don't do that anymore.

Have you corrected any blind spots you had? What were they?

                               THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR

Comments (43)

Debbie Malone
Londeree's Real Estate & Property Management - Lynchburg, VA
From Lynchburg To The Lake (434) 546-0369

Gary, we had a coaching class on change today. It's hard to make those changes when you have set patterns but it it possible if you want it enough and you have the tools to make it happen. Great post.

Jun 25, 2008 01:52 PM
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Debbie: Thanks for your feedback from your coaching class. They say it takes something like 21 days to make a new habit, so it is no wonder that breaking the old pattern is so tough. Thank you for your comment. I so appreciate it.

Jun 25, 2008 02:00 PM
Pam Pugmire
Silvercreek Realty Group - Meridian, ID
Meridian Idaho Real Estate
Gary~ Asking people for their honest opinion can be very SCARY! Feel the fear and do it anyway! Great reminder. I still don't want to do it though. ; )
Jun 25, 2008 02:22 PM
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Pam: Awww, you are such a sweetie, they all would just love you to death. Nothing to fear.

Jun 25, 2008 02:24 PM
Trey Thurmond
BCR Realtors - College Station, TX
College Station , Texas Homes

Gary

Good post. I always am reminded of when I quit smoking. That was a big change. I think the key is you have to want it first...then make the covenant with yourself ,and the man above. Then just do it!

Jun 25, 2008 03:38 PM
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Trey: Great point on WANTING IT. That strong drive and determination is a good point to launch from prior to the covenant you spoke of.

Jun 25, 2008 03:51 PM
Celeste "SALLY" Cheeseman
Liberty Homes - Mililani, HI
(RA) AHWD CRS ePRO OAHU HAWAII REAL ESTATE

I worked for a residential program for young men and women (okay...all ages) reintergrating back into the community. When it comes to wanting ...yeah ...that's the first step....wanting and taking that first step is another barrier to overcome. So many times people have the "information" but refuse to stray from what is comfortable...even if detrimental to their very being.

Same for anything else in life. Gotta want it...then put it into action...over and over and over ...and continuously....

 

Okay...been a couple of days and I'm going wild on commenting :) :)

Jun 25, 2008 05:15 PM
Jesse Clifton
Jesse Clifton & Associates - Fairbanks, AK

Now when you say blind spots, are you looking for just one.... or do you have an hour or so for a cranky 'ol horses ____.

Self-awareness is a hard concept for some to grasp... It's something I work at daily.

Jun 25, 2008 07:53 PM
Kris Wales
Keller Williams Realty - Lakeside Market Center - Macomb, MI
Real Estate Blog & Homes for Sale search site, Macomb County MI

Turn around and listen to your friends.  Wise words Gary.  A true friend will tell you the truth.  Listen to them. 

Jun 25, 2008 10:32 PM
Susan Mangigian
RE/MAX Preferred - West Chester, PA
Chester & Delaware County Homes, Delaware and Ches
When I really want an honest answer, I ask my mom! She is as blunt and honest as the day is long. Ouch!
Jun 25, 2008 11:53 PM
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Sally: You reiterated what another said about the strong desire for something. It sure does provide the motivation you need to get to the next step. Great observation. And you can be wordy anytime. I like your thoughts. Blogger gone wild. That's funny.

Jesse: You just need to surround yourself at the local bar with all your friends and they can do a Roast on you with all your blind spots. Do you have several hours? ; )

Kris: I keep listening intently to all my friends. They usually never let me down with their comments. I just wish they were more gentle. I have too many brutally honest friends.

Susan: I am so happy you know your Mom is the one you can turn to in order to get the straight scoop about yourself. We need someone like that in our life that is a steady compass and doesn't beat around the bush with us. I know. Ouch! But it is a good cleansing for someone to tell us about ourselves as it really is. Someone from the outside (particularly a Mom) can make you open your eyes and get back to flying straight. I'm sure you do that with your sons as well.

Jun 26, 2008 12:26 AM
Eleanor Thorne
Equity Resources - Cary, NC
Advantage Lending 919-649-5058

Blind Spots - what a great wya to look at it - and a lesson I can share with my teenager!  We call it "filtering" as we discuss the issue of just "Blurting" out and interrupting folks!

Jun 26, 2008 12:51 AM
Leesa Finley
RED Properties - Wake Forest, NC
RED Properties - Raleigh NC Real Estate

Wow, Gary - this is a deep one for me.  Hold on, let me finish and stop interrupting! ;)  Seriously though, I can't even broach this one - I am way too into listening to my own heart and head than those of friends.  NO ONE YELL AT ME!  Way too many bad experiences with friends - REALLY BAD!  There is one friend I have that has the Blurting Teenager above and I do very much value her opinions and advice.  But, she is one of VERY few!

Jun 26, 2008 12:57 AM
Yvette Smith
LONG & FOSTER - Williamsburg, VA
Realtor In Williamsburg VA, Homes for Sale

Hi Gary, Yes, indeed I have a fair amount of blind spots!  I'm impatient!!  I'm a monster when I don't get my way!!  What can I say, I'm a working on this...really!!  Having children has helped with patience, somewhat.

Thanks for this one Gary!! 

Jun 26, 2008 03:47 AM
Liz Moras Migic
Chilliwack, BC
Chilliwack, British Columbia - Realtor

Oh so very true.......we may bristle when our friends say something 'hinting' or not.....!  About our blind spots.....but if we pay attention it can so change how people hear and see us........Who doesn''t want to polish up the presentation......whether it be our clients, family or friends?

Jun 26, 2008 06:09 AM
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Eleanor: Blurting out is not intentional, but a bad habit (blind spot) that we can correct.

Leesa: Glad you found at least one that you value their opinions. Listen to them.

Yvette: You'll have to set the example for those young ones. I'm sure some days are easier than others.

Liz: I like your term about polishing ourselves. Very good.

Jun 26, 2008 06:45 AM
Patricia Beck
RE/MAX Properties, Inc., ABR, GRI, SRES - Colorado Springs, CO
Colorado Springs Realty

We can always make changes to become better people and I feel like there is something I can always improve on!!  It's a lot of work but it definitely begins with the desire to change first and foremost!

Jun 27, 2008 10:34 AM
-- Casey Brischle
Columbia Bank - Spokane, WA
Spokane Home Loan Mortgage Professional

Great post...kinda crazy.  I just got doen reading George Tallabas' "Embracing Change and reaping the benfits" blog right before clicking on this.  With the topic so obvious and people writing about it, you can't help but change!

Jun 27, 2008 11:41 AM
Lynn Johnson
Coldwell Banker Home Connection - Owatonna, MN
Owatonna, MN Real Estate
Gary - You always find a way to "teach" something that promises self improvement. Listening for our weaknesses isn't easy, but I'm grateful to my two business partners as they can be up front with me when I start going too fast and too far, as I'm prone to doing (without being grounded in follow through and consistency). I need to continue listening all around me.
Jun 28, 2008 05:29 AM
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Patricia: You have to want it! Very astute on your part.

Casey: Make the change for the better. We can all do it.

Lynn: Keep listening. There is much truth in what others that we trust are telling us.

Jun 28, 2008 05:53 AM