Venus Popped Into the Room

Real Estate Agent with Value Added Service, 602-620-2699 SA5376460000

In every profession there are unwritten rules as to professional boundaries.   What information to share, and what information not to share as appropriate.


For instance, if a painter asks how your love life is going, you might be caught off guard if your only interraction with that person is on a business level.  


But in a real estate profession, it’s not uncommon to ask how a client or prospective client’s family is doing; how their job is under the circumstances; or when their daughter is due to give birth.


In real estate we are ingrained in people’s lives because we need to be in order to understand their housing needs.  We need to know their wants and desires so we can solve housing issues, helping people to get from point A to point B.  But not ever profession is so entrenched in a client's life.


Recently, I experienced a faux pau during a recent medical visit.  The doctor began saying in the middle of my treatment how his girlfriend was from Venus.  What does that have to do with anying other than the doctor's personal life.


Since I’m from the same planet, I wondered, “Was he bashing all women or just his girlfriend? “


And if the conversation wasn’t bad enough, his lack of empathy and caring during the visit left me feeling he wasn’t even concerned about my well-being.  I felt as if he had too much on his mind to care. 


When I winced, he asked where I felt that pain.  Pointing to the hardware in my back, I commented, “You know, aisle 13” as If I were in a hardware store because that’s how he made me feel.


Minutes later, at the same medical office, a staff member reprimanded an employee right in front of me, a new patient.   How do they expect to remain in business or keep employees with their lack of professionalism? 


Do I take it upon myself to give them a sour yelp review? 


That’s not my mode of helping someone see what they are doing is wrong.  And is it my responsibility? 


Am I responsible for correcting/helping a business owner who has decades of experience that should know better when treating any patient, let alone a new patient?    


Are we real estate professionals guilty of working when we’re in the middle of personal matters?  Are we 100% on top of our game when we’re with clients, helping them with what is oftentimes their largest single investment?


There have been times when I’ve worked through a migraine when I should have postponed showing homes to clients.  They would have understood. 


We are all replacable but shouldn’t we provide so much value and authentic service that clients will wait for us to be available?  If the answer is no, then it’s time to revisit your value in this business.


This medical visit is a reminder of how NOT to do business.  They won’t receive any referrals from me and I will look for a new professional. 


Real estate is no different. If you want to be successful, be THAT business that everyone wants to refer!  


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Comments (9)

Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

Jan sorry to hear about your experience... just to give you an idea Diane and I have the same Dr and we had her for 26+ years.... we have the same Dentist for 26+ years and we have the same eye DR for 26+ years... when we relocated from Boston... we asked for referrals that were on every ones like list.... and I remembered that and I have always been loyal... and they have not disappointed us.. just like I provide the same quality of Real Estate business:)Endre

Aug 09, 2021 10:53 PM
Jan Green

I hear ya Endre Barath, Jr. this doctor was referred by a friend of mine. NEXT!

Aug 11, 2021 12:55 PM
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

Hello Jan - somebody is watching and/or listening even when you think "they" may not be.  

Aug 10, 2021 02:40 AM
Jan Green

Good  Michael Jacobs I think that's only fair.  Karma works, too!

Aug 11, 2021 12:56 PM
Brian England
Vacasa - Gilbert, AZ
MBA, GRI, REALTOR® Real Estate in East Valley AZ

My parents often complain about the service they receive at doctor offices, but it is rarely about the doctor themselves, it is always about the staff not being competent.

Aug 10, 2021 05:33 AM
Jan Green

Competency includes so much more than knowledge these days.  Having good manners, etc is so important Brian England .  I hope that improves for your parents!

Aug 11, 2021 12:57 PM
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667,, Broker, eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
Helping your Montana dreams take root

I'd be looking for a new physician as well. And you're right - people will remember how we make them feel (and we will remember how others make us feel). That's something to keep in mind no matter what we are doing.


Have a wonderful day!

Aug 10, 2021 06:04 AM
Jan Green

So true Kat Palmiotti .  This doctor was a referral, but thankfully there's another one I can try that appears much more to my needs!  Best of luck!

Aug 11, 2021 12:57 PM
Ron and Alexandra Seigel
Napa Consultants - Carpinteria, CA
Luxury Real Estate Branding, Marketing & Strategy


What a story!  And Kat Palmiotti reminded me wiht her comment of a quote by Maya Angelou,  people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Aug 10, 2021 06:46 AM
Jan Green

Love that quote Ron and Alexandra Seigel !  So important to be courteous, respectful and of good service if you want to keep business these days!

Aug 11, 2021 12:58 PM
Rocky Dickerson
Realty One Group - Las Vegas, NV
Superior Service!

Good morning Jan! I get so disappointed when a "professional" treats me like they are anything but a professional.

Aug 10, 2021 08:41 AM
Jan Green

Spot on Rocky Dickerson !  Very frustrating!

Aug 11, 2021 12:58 PM
Joan Cox
House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373 - Denver, CO
Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time

Jan, OH MY, had a doctor said that to me, it would definitely be the last visit!   Really hate docs anyway - white coat syndrome.    We do delve sometimes into our clients' lives but for a good reason.

Aug 10, 2021 03:22 PM
Jan Green

Yes I won't see this one again.  There is another in the office and I've seen her before - I'll schedule with her next time. She wasn't available that day.   I've only seen this doc twice before so no reason why he thought that I was okay with that conversation?!

Aug 11, 2021 01:02 PM
Dan Hopper
Dan Hopper - Gold Way RE - Westminster, CO
Denver Broker / Real Estate Advocate

Oh my,  ... I am like most in here with their comments.  Some "small talk" is just not really appropriate when dealing with your clients.  Then again, who knows... he might have been serious about the Venus story... lots of weird things going on in our Universe, lol.

Aug 12, 2021 07:32 AM
Jan Green
Value Added Service, 602-620-2699 - Scottsdale, AZ
HomeSmart Elite Group, REALTOR®, EcoBroker, GREEN

You're right Dan Hopper lots of weird stuff these days!  Have a great day!

Aug 12, 2021 08:44 AM