THE "NOT YOU" (mystery)

Real Estate Broker/Owner with people first...then business Ran Right Realty 636943 licensed to thrill

You have always been aware of yourself and the not yourself as it surfaced here & there throughout your lifetime. Saying or doing something embarrassing or awkward leaves one asking: Why did I say or do that? The disconnect is you glimpsing your real self from the not so real or programmed self. Let's explore this


From the infant stage, a baby only knows to respond & react to basic needs without thought or agenda. Noise is how an infant communicates not even knowing what it is saying. The parent reads & responds to the noise. All natural


As an infant starts to become aware of its sensations, feelings & pangs, it becomes familiar with them in a most innocent way & without knowing, the learning stage has kicked in. It realizes when it does something, a response is on its way. Crude but effective for all involved. This learning communication perfects itself with usage. A deliberate intelligence is being formed. An identity seed is planted.


Subtle but sure, a programming has begun involving learning as you go, trial & error, cause & effect plus belief (s) are being formed. Repetition reinforces it all & it will now be done to you as you believe. It is as simple as that. But wait, something happens as we grow. Parental/authority learning is imprinting itself upon you


The world, the people & our random thoughts start to join-up & affect us drawing us away from our true & inner selves to form a symbiotic relationship with our surroundings. The catalyst for it is our minds growing through intellect & at some point, taking charge of our comings & goings. Are we in charge or have we become a creature of automatic response, suggestion & easily influence? 


Have you ever seen yourself going along with something while reluctant to do so? Factors like: everyone is doing it, I better go along, don't make waves & more all come non-stop from your thinking. Your heart is left behind & you find that acceptable. Why? The pressure from the moment will mitigate when you give in


A new and foreign (to the self) system is now at work in you trying to make its permanent home. The ego has grown legs & arms & it wants to exercise them while the heart & your child-like presence is now second place & perhaps taken captive subject to forces coming to bear. The child is forced to turn the other cheek in a sense. It gives in not knowing what else to do. A subtle sadness at work


A thinking process called thought will enter in, you will feel its presence & drive, & you will then act or react accordingly. In the beginning, what's to complain? You are in a type of flow i.e. an action is taking place & a feeling of participation is at work. But it is not heart-driven nor coming from your inner compass or being. 


Who's driving all this? Who is at the helm? Are you mistaking your mind for yourself? Thinking can only go so far. It does not have all your answers or even some of them. Mankind's history bears this out. The heart, which is the entrance & hallway to the soul must live & be fed. The mind (in the end) returns to worm-food


A good place to start is who are you not? You are not your thinking! You are not what you learned! We are looking for the self, the unique, one of a kind creation that has been added to. A series of conflicts will surface pointing this out


NOTE: The child came first then was added to. The adult feeds/pursues all the necessary needs & wants while the child goes along accepting the events. It is necessary to form an equal partnership where both benefit as they go. 


Rigidity, constant seriousness, worry, willfulness, sinking in your thinking, lack of spontaneity, restlessness and nagging persistent-wants surface as a by-product when the adult runs away fully with itself. A natural harmony/balance is missing


Exactly what you are looking for & (what is necessary) is waiting in the wings i.e. the child in you who wants very much to come-out, play, interact & contribute forming a healthy balanced individual. Care-free-ness, spontaneity & humor surface without effort. We now play in our work which creates a satisfying passion


Harmony is no myth. Nature does it constantly as does the Earth and our Solar System. A Blithe Spirit i.e. a happy light-hearted character is formed and is capable of anything it cares to address. It is an effortless existence & deeply rewarding

Anything less than this is the NOT YOU

Comments (9)

Ray Henson
eXp Realty of California, Inc. (lic. #01878277) - Elk Grove, CA

I have long thought I have too much adult going on in my life.  Once you go down that road, it is hard to move back.  Thank you for your thoughtful post.

Feb 04, 2022 08:52 AM
Richie Alan Naggar

Consider this a welcome home for yourself and your inner child Raymond Henson, eXp Realty The adult had a good run. Time for change

Feb 04, 2022 08:55 AM
Aura Alex
Seattle, WA
Retired Real Estate Pro

Hello, Richie.  I was once told I needed to act my "shoe size"  to maintain my sanity.  It has worked!  My shoe size is 6 1/2!  Thank you for the inspiring post. 

Feb 04, 2022 09:07 AM
Richie Alan Naggar

Thank you too for a LOL & enlightening response my dear Aura Alex 

Feb 04, 2022 02:05 PM
Ed (Edward) Silva, 203-206-0754
Mapleridge Realty, CT 203-206-0754 - Waterbury, CT
Central CT Real Estate Broker Serving all equally

My heart and parts of my mind want to keep thinking of the inner child. The extremities that have seen too many clicks of the calendar are a reminder that I'm not a kid anymore.

Feb 04, 2022 09:57 AM
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

Hi Richie- My inner child has my permission to make an appearance whenever she wants or feels she needs to. In fact, I do not want to be the person who cannot enjoy Disneyworld or having fun. If and when I get there, hit me over the head and wake me up. 

Feb 04, 2022 11:12 AM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Richie - when I do leadership I will ask if leaders are born or made.  I contend they are main.  We are the sum total of our experiences and some experiences have bad effects.

Feb 04, 2022 11:20 AM
Ron and Alexandra Seigel
Napa Consultants - Carpinteria, CA
Luxury Real Estate Branding, Marketing & Strategy


Grant Schneider summed up my thoughts perfectly.  Wishing you a delightful weekend. A

Feb 04, 2022 01:19 PM
Hannah Williams
HomeStarr Realty - Philadelphia, PA
Expertise NE Philadelphia & Bucks 215-820-3376

Richie Alan Naggar   Do we really ever grow up or do our bodies just grow old 

Feb 04, 2022 06:41 PM
Richie Alan Naggar

Most excellent ponder worthy food in your commenting thank you little Hannah Williams 

Feb 05, 2022 06:33 AM
Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices California Properties - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

Richie when I was 3-6 years old my father used to tease me that I am acting like an old man.... I was always  focused and serious.... he tried to tell me have fun:))Endre

Feb 04, 2022 11:41 PM
Richie Alan Naggar

Those memories will give way to their meaning in due time Endre Barath, Jr. 

Feb 05, 2022 06:33 AM
Brian England
Ambrose Realty Management LLC - Gilbert, AZ
MBA, GRI, REALTOR® Real Estate in East Valley AZ

I definitely don't want my inner child to go away, living life like a child is the way to go in my opinion.

Feb 05, 2022 04:55 AM