Adversity is something that every real estate agent will face, and more than once or twice. It's a part of life, and knowing how to overcome adversity and grow from it is a learned skill, and we are here to help.
Willie Jollie, a motivational speaker who focuses on overcoming setbacks, once said, "Adversity and challenges are life's way of creating strength. Adversity creates a challenge, and challenge creates change, and change is necessary for growth. Without change and challenge, there can be no growth and development."
In the moments of adversity, they rarely feel like opportunity, but that's what they are. To use an analogy, picture this: You are standing on a beach along the ocean. You stand right at the water's edge where the waves are crashing, and when that wave hits you, you get knocked right off your feet.
You might stand up, dust the sand off yourself, face the next wave and brace yourself for the impact, but this act of resistance can actually make it easier for this wave to knock you over.
Now, you can turn your back to the water to brace yourself better, but then you can't see the waves when they come.
In fact, not seeing what waves are coming creates more anxiety. It can play tricks on your mind because you are anticipating getting hit by a wave, but you don't know how big or when which creates even more stress.
You could stand with your side facing the water so you can kind of see what's coming, and when the wave hits you, you won't get knocked over, though you will be unbalanced and wobbly.
So, what's the answer? How do we keep these adversity waves from knocking us over? It's not about trying to stand your ground at all! When you face the waves, and one comes to knock you over, you dive forward INTO the wave. The wave washes right over and around you, but you haven't been knocked down; you are moving through it — you have taken control of the outcome. You are moving forward.
Now imagine you are out in the water. Notice that the waves don't crash here? They swell and crest, but they move past you in their journey to the shore.
Can you see the parallels to life? Adversity comes and knocks us right over if we aren't ready for it because life is made up of strong waves, but you can't run away from it or turn your back on it; you can only find your power over life's adversity by diving into it. You have control over your actions and your future.
Practical Ways to “Dive Into” Adversity
It’s one thing to give you an analogy to understand how to face adversity, but we took it one step further to provide you with some practical applications to facing adversity.
- Be prepared – You are facing that ocean and see every wave of adversity coming at you. By gauging the size of the wave and paying attention to your timing, you can dive at the right time. Knowing that adversity WILL come (because it’s impossible to avoid), you can take steps today to prepare for adversity in the future. Whether it's having money set aside for emergencies or having a network of supportive people who can jump in and help, you will be glad to have a system in place when something happens.
- Be disciplined – It’s all about diving into the wave, not bellyflopping. Creating good habits in your business and life, as well as being disciplined in spending (and saving) and your health and having a plan (and sticking to it), will help prevent adversity before it happens and help you through it when it does.
- Keep your bearings – When in the middle of adversity, it can be easy to lose sight of the buoy and our goals. Keeping our eyes on where we want to be will keep us moving in the right direction, no matter how high the waves are.
- Learn the lesson – A man named Dan Millman, author and speaker in the realm of personal development, once said, “There are no mistakes, only lessons. If you don’t learn the lesson the first time, they get harder.” When adversity hits, the first question we should ask ourselves is, “what’s the lesson here?” When we understand that, we can come out through the other side of the wave.
- Advance your skills – Once we understand the lesson and come up for air on the backside of the wave, we know how to dive better when the next wave comes. Advancing our skills and diving into the learning we need to do to swim better next time is how we experience growth.
- Be kind to yourself – Everyone goes through tough times (literally, everyone). Putting yourself down or kicking yourself for struggling only leaves you floundering, getting tossed back to the shore by the wave and sprawling in the sand. Understanding that sometimes adversity is a natural part of life will help you leave critical self-talk behind and help you stop focusing on the negative emotions and move towards staying positive.
- Choose your friends well – Having a coach and an amazing support group can help you through each wave of adversity and enable you to learn, grow, and stay positive because you have a community to help you through it.
If there is nothing else you remember about facing adversity, always know that you are not alone in it. Countless other real estate agents have experienced (or are currently experiencing) the same struggles you are. Rather than sit alone feeling overwhelmed, reach out. We are here to help!
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