Meeting fear in the face of the unknown is one thing. Conquering fear is another. My journey begins traveling from Illinois to Bailey’s Harbor in Door County, Wisconsin thirty-one years ago. My destination was a retreat house on Kangaroo Lake. There were no navigational tools back then, just an ordinary paper map of the United States.
Unbelievably, I was a new driver with a stick shift and driving skills were less than perfect. However, I managed to get as far as Sturgeon Bay, but I was lost. Driving alone did not scare me, until I was shadowed by darkness and heavy fog began rolling in. There were trees. Lots of them. Tall trees. Snarling ones too! It was the night before Halloween. My schedule and driving distance were wrong. I felt like it was haunted territory. The weather was cold and damp. Visibility was difficult. Up ahead was a road. I pulled inside to catch my breath to try figuring things out, alone, in the dark, in the drizzling rain.
The old tree-lined road was eerie. Still feeling confident, I closed my eyes to think things through carefully. I did not recall seeing any stores or gas stations. Then, I turned on the radio. I heard Michael Jackson’s voice. He was singing Thriller! I pressed on the gas and punched it. To my surprise, the road I turned down was a cemetery! The breath that I felt was my own. Looking down on my gauge I was near empty! As I began to back-up, I stopped short of hitting a tree. A three-point turn was impossible. I had no choice but to continue down cemetery road not knowing where I was going. Thriller was still playing. My children came into my minds view. I remembered how silly they were singing Thriller with their friends. I was the one who taught them the words! I was the one who taught them to be fearless! As soon as I saw flat land without culverts, I made my turn and drove out of the cemetery This was the moment I needed to laugh at fear in the face of the unknown and never let doubt determine my fate.
A gas station was up the road. After gassing up my car, I knew, my only choice was to face my fears head-on and get through any scary obstacles. Panicking does no good. Thinking about my kids helped. I had to get to my destination. From a payphone, I called them. They were fine at the neighbor’s house watching Halloween movies. I heard all about the corny movie and how fake it was. Once I got back on the road, I knew, "The only thing to fear, is fear itself --- Franklin D. Roosevelt was right. I learned thinking the worst was not an option.
For four more years, I traveled back to Kangaroo Lake without fear. This is a non-fiction story created by Patricia Feager
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