It all takes place here.
Let's get the "caveat" in the title out of the way. Humans have a tendency to sink in their think resulting in a fantasy world made up of lies. Why lies? Because none of those thoughts are true based on results. They take the familiar form of I could, would or should have but the facts of the matter say differently.
THE PAST? r.i.p.
Let it rest in peace. Be done with it as it is done with you! Can we reflect? Perhaps spend a ponder? How about a reminisce? Sure. However, if you stray or stay too long in your thoughts, a strange and interesting dynamic visits with you.
Yes, there are times when we could have handled something better no doubt about that. Spend too long in that realm & you are taken captive & made subject to drowning in your dreams by your own hand too. A better way to proceed with regret?
LEARN FROM IT
Realizing that we were not there, for whatever reason, allows us to visit with our mortality, fragility & ignorance for if we knew better in that moment, we certainly would do what hindsight is saying. But reality says otherwise, right here right now
WATCH OUT FOR THIS
Thinking does not give us the answers for life, intimacy, love & purpose. If it did, our personal history as well as our shared history (mankind) would have produced evidence of that belief. Instead, trial & error, learning curves & risking to grow, in the very moment presented is more productive. Explore, adventure & experiment
PROOF of the PUDDING?
Wrong choices trigger the conscience, this we know. Then, wouldn't right choices, (subjective) reward & satisfy not only in the moment but as an investment for what is to come? Results don't lie & lack of results don't lie either. Trust in this.
THIS VISITS WITH US ALL...JUST DON'T ALLOW IT TO MAKE ITSELF AT HOME
Insanity! I am speaking of doing the same thing over & over again expecting a different result. I have done this as you have too. However, as soon as I realize it, I stop this, take time out, allow for time & circumstance to speak, and it does!
OUR PERSONAL HISTORY
We are not only creating it in the moment we are in but living it too! Also, it does not need to be grandiose in its practice meaning we do not have to apply effort or trigger quantity dynamics. Keeping it real, spontaneous & simple will reward nicely for not only history, but history in the making called OUR NOW or present.
THE ACT OF BEING
Just being ourselves, whatever that is, without effort but with "life", gives us a living peace and even a type of rest as we go. It is good enough! Too often, and over time, we are taught (incorrectly), or a belief (intruder) enters in (of which we accept) that tells us otherwise. I speak of innocent acceptance of who we are and who we are not. I speak this with humility. That's why it works!
INCLUDE IN YOUR PERSONAL HISTORY
1. Manners & courtesy. Not only does it feel right & pay off, but what a nice way to be remembered. "they were always so nice & respectful" says it all does it not?
2. Generosity! I am speaking of the tangible and intangible that we can share which is like a personal "leave behind", so pleasant too. "they were so giving"?
3. Listening to others, which is a type of giving, that borders on being priceless. The feeling that you were heard, frees people, promotes love & friendship too.
4. Forgiveness, not just to ourselves, but to others for whatever reason. Imagine being remembered or known as someone who forgave, did not judge or condemn
5. Being approachable, inviting & reachable is something others will never forget.
6. Sacrifice, as in making allowances, going without & doing it silently will create a carefree, genuine & loving demeanor. Many will just have a pleasant thought of you, beyond words. Suffering someone when they are insufferable? It happens
WRITE YOUR OWN HISTORY
Make it extraordinary, remarkable & testify to it by the very living of it. Have & seek a blithe spirit, because anyone can! Next time you are in the different arenas of life, people & circumstances, be reminded, they are just like you. Be glad in that.