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Atlanta Buckhead Midtown - Staying Positive On AR Or At Least Neutral

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with Atlanta Homes ODAT Realty - Love our Great City - Love our Clients! Buckhead - Midtown - Westside

Atlanta Buckhead Midtown 
Staying Positive On AR
Or At Least Neutral 

One of the most wonderful aspects of ActiveRain has always been the respect shown between members. The Founders gave ActiveRain a strong basis for community growth. Knowledge of its foundations is what gives a community strength and cohesion.

The Founders even provided a post called Getting started on ActiveRain

One Founder document was the WELTANSCHAUUNG, A WORLD VIEW of "what ActiveRain stands for" in the Founders' minds. Very worthwhile to read.

Another Founder document details the COMMUNITY GUIDELINES. The guidelines are fascinating to read as a guide to online behavior anywhere on the Internet. 

SO ---- what to do if someone is impolite in comments? IMHO - ignore the comment and move on. If the rudeness includes a positive suggestion, well, pay attention to that aspect. Then ignore the rest.

In any situation, I always try to take the road HIGHER than the person whose behavior is less than appropriate.

Proudly, I remember posts I put up on my Blog that received strong criticisms. And lots of them as well. What we write, I think, should have a point of view and that, from time to time, may stimulate strong opinions on different sides.

Don't like a comment on your work? Remember the words of St. Francis of Assisi in his famous Peace Prayer - ..."it is in pardoning that we are pardoned..." and then JUST LET IT GO. What people say is often more about them than about the person to whom the comment was directed.

Please see the clear statements posted by Debe Maxwell recently. Lots to learn from what she shares in that post. In fact, I've taken the liberty to quote her quite extensively below.
All the best - Lynn

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LIBERALLY QUOTED FROM Debe Maxwell, CRS in her post about civility.

"It's important to remember that constructive debate and respectful disagreement are healthy. They challenge our assumptions, broaden our horizons and lead to growth. But, when disagreements turn into rude comments and personal attacks, it sours the entire community.

So, what can we do to maintain a positive and
supportive environment on ActiveRain?

  1. Identify Bullying: Recognize when comments are not just disagreements but are attempts to bully or belittle others. These often come in the form of passive-aggressive remarks or thinly veiled insults.

  2. Stand Up for Others: If you see someone being unfairly targeted, offer your support. A kind word or a constructive counter-comment can go a long way in diffusing negativity.

  3. Stay Positive: Focus on contributing positively to the conversation. Highlight the benefits, share success stories, and provide constructive feedback. Remember what your grandmother taught you - "If you don't have anything nice to day, don't say anything at all."

  4. Ignore Negativity: Don’t let negative comments derail your participation. Stay focused on your goals and continue engaging with like-minded members who value respectful discussions.

  5. Report Inappropriate Behavior: If you encounter bullying or personal attacks, press the report button. This helps maintain the integrity of the community and ensures a welcoming space for everyone. Someone pressing the report button is what brought about this post!

By fostering a culture of respect and positivity, we can ensure that ActiveRain remains a valuable resource for ALL of our members. Let’s not let a few detractors ruin the fun and productive exchange of ideas for all. Aren’t we all here to learn, grow and support one another in our real estate journeys."

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PS -  Image above was formulated using Nightcafe AI. It is fun for me to try.
Prompt was "Walking ahead towards a field of blooming sunflowers bordered by Aspen trees on a sunny day."  L

Show All Comments Sort:
Debe Maxwell, CRS
Savvy + Company (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
The RIGHT CHARLOTTE REALTOR!

Hi Lynn! I love your attitude! One of the things that you have said to me in the past that really hits home, is that people don't always know what others are going through in life when they behave negatively. As you've also said, there are far more critical things going on in life than to spend time worrying about someone else's negativity.

Your advice in this post is, as always, quite sound. Of course I'm honored that you shared some of my quotes as well! Have a lovely weekend... 

Aug 09, 2024 10:28 PM
Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375

Debe Maxwell, CRS 
Thanks for your kind words. Lynn

Aug 10, 2024 04:53 AM
Laura Cerrano
Feng Shui Manhattan Long Island - Locust Valley, NY
Certified Feng Shui Expert, Speaker & Researcher

I’m hearing good things about Atlanta lately. I Hope to head out there soon for something fun!!

Aug 09, 2024 10:41 PM
Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375

Laura Cerrano 
Let me know ahead of time so we can pull together a group of AR members to greet you. Have you tried the group AR-ups  when traveling? I have had success with it for contacting other members when on the road. All the best - Lynn

Aug 10, 2024 04:57 AM
Nina Hollander, Broker
Coldwell Banker Realty - Charlotte, NC
Your Greater Charlotte Real Estate Broker

Good morning, Lynn... just as I ignore certain people and comments on social media, I do it here, as well.

Aug 10, 2024 05:18 AM
Brian England
Ambrose Realty Management LLC - Gilbert, AZ
MBA, GRI, REALTOR® Real Estate in East Valley AZ

I am all about being nice to others, showing respect, and definitely forgiveness, but at the same time, I believe that people should always be held accountable for their actions.  We are told in the Bible "My brothers, if someone is detected in sin, you who live by the spirit should gently set him right, each of you trying to avoid falling into temptation himself.  Help carry one another's burdens; in that way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

Aug 10, 2024 05:59 AM
Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375

Brian England 
Since many people follow many different religions, let's skip to the point of what does one hope to accomplish on whatever path one chooses to take. In your scenario, you feel an obligation to "gently set him right, each of you trying to avoid falling into temptation himself." 

So if the temptation is complaining and another person complains about the complaints, it seems that person has not avoided the temptation themselves. Seems like double complaining to me.

However, if one leads by behavioral example, as so many people here in AR continually laud you, Brian, for your kindness and support of others, could that be seen as setting the person right by example as opposed to indulging in criticism to counter criticism? That avoids the scenario of the adult seeing a child hit a dog and turning around to hit the kid saying "Don't hit the dog?"

Aug 10, 2024 07:07 PM
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

I love this Lynn- And to echo what Debe Maxwell, CRS said about your attitude...remember you never know what other people are going through.  We often have to bite our tongues or shake our heads and move on. 

Aug 10, 2024 07:56 AM
Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375

Kathy Streib
And then reflect on how lucky each of us is that we are living our lives and don't have to live theirs!

Aug 10, 2024 07:09 PM
Eileen Burns 954.483.3912
Trans State Commercial Realty Inc. - Fort Lauderdale, FL
FLorida Real Estate Connector

We can all grin with your stick man on the road to AI Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375 Your words are flowery and inspiring as well as Debe's.  Happy Saturday😎  

Aug 10, 2024 09:17 AM
Eileen Burns 954.483.3912

sunflowers keep him in motion😎

Aug 11, 2024 05:42 AM
Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375

Eileen Burns 954.483.3912 
Thanks for the continued support Eileen!
He looks a bit confused about which direction is next.
All the best - Lynn

Aug 10, 2024 07:13 PM
George Souto
George Souto NMLS #65149 - Middletown, CT
Your Connecticut Mortgage Expert

Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375 that is good advice, but I am still a work in progress on turning the other cheek.

Aug 10, 2024 12:35 PM
Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375

George Souto 
And giving yourself credit for being able to recognize that I hope!!! Lynn

Aug 10, 2024 07:11 PM
Dorie Dillard Austin TX
Coldwell Banker Realty ~ 512.750.6899 - Austin, TX
NW Austin ~ Canyon Creek and Spicewood/Balcones

Good afternoon Lynn,

I love your post and your message and of course love the quotes that Debe Maxwell, CRS made in her post. I'm all for differences of opinion as long as you don't belittle someone and why on earth phrase things that are impolite? I don't understand that..kindess in expressing a difference of opinion is always the best way to go!

Aug 10, 2024 02:14 PM
Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375

Dorie Dillard Austin TX 
Yes and your behavior demonstrates daily that you live those principles. So glad the I got to know you in the 'Rain. Lynn

Aug 10, 2024 07:10 PM
Wayne Martin
Wayne M Martin - Oswego, IL
Real Estate Broker - Retired

Good morning Lynn. I have become a real advocate of if you can't say something good don't speak. It is asking me a lot of time. Enjoy your day.

Aug 11, 2024 06:15 AM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Hi Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375,

I love your post, the message it conveys, and the wonderful "Debe" quotes you've included!

Aug 11, 2024 04:35 PM
Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices California Properties - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375  I am like my friend George Souto  a work in progress, now with that said have you seen the movie Shindler's List? if you did than you would understand about the Camp Commandant.... I feel the same way.... when people cross me and lie to me and make phony comments on my posts  it is hard for me to be Neutral...Endre

Aug 11, 2024 10:24 PM
Kat Palmiotti
eXp Commercial, Referral Divison - Kalispell, MT
Helping your Montana dreams take root

Good morning! If someone is negative in a comment, I think there are three options! Ignore, respond in kind, or respond in kindness. I'd like to think I typically do the third, but sometimes the first is required. The 2nd I do in my head.

Aug 14, 2024 05:26 AM
Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375

Kat Palmiotti 
WORDS OF WISDOM!!!!!
Love the "in my head" part!
Hugs

Aug 14, 2024 02:58 PM
Patricia Feager
Flower Mound, TX

Lynn B. Friedman CRS Atlanta, GA 404-617-6375 - I always believed in taking the high road. If I failed, it's because nobody walks in my shoes, just like I don't walk in their shoes. I can usually tolerate when someone is negative, but when it becomes consistent and there are name callings, I can't allow myself to be be disrespected and the warrior in me makes a statement. 

When boundaries are crossed, it is hard to make things right and ignoring bad behavior when it persists doesn't always work. I don't believe any of us were created to be disrespectful to one another. And I don't believe being an enabler is the solution. 

I am so thankful for you and your guidance here on ActiveRain. You are a beacon of light.  

Aug 16, 2024 05:10 PM