Admin

Are you afraid or excited?

By
Real Estate Agent with Realty ONE Group Advocates 484-237-2055 PA License - AB067198

I was listening to something today and one of the points made was this question. Are you afraid or excited? It seems the two are very similar in how your body reacts.

When change comes into our lives we can be afraid or we can be excited. When we decide to adapt a new hobby we can be afraid we will make a fool of ourselves, or excited about learning and enjoying something new. When we decide to accept a challenge we can be afraid at failing or excited to take part and achieve far more than we thought we could.

I remember I had wanted to run a marathon for the longest time. But, frankly, I do not have a runners body, and running any distance was not my favourite thing to do. But after being alive and thinking about this for 39 years I decided I would run a marathon. I was worried I would not finish, I would hit the wall and have to drop out. I entered the forms and was accepted. I started training and it was a particularly hot year, many long runs got cut short due to exhaustion and overheating. But, on the day of the Marathon in Philadelphia I was ready. I was excited, even though it was a really warm November day, up in the 70's I realized I had trained all year in hot weather even if I had never run the whole distance. I ended up starting with people aiming for 10 minute miles which had been my average pace, although my plan had been to run at a 12  minute pace. For 19 miles all went well, I stayed with my group then it happened, my legs locked up and I could hardly move, let alone run. I pushed on and walking and jogging to the end I made it to the finish line. Those last miles took almost as long as the 19 but I was so excited to have completed that run.

When I decided to walk a Camino from Lisbon to Santiago de Compostela I was really excited, till the morning I woke up in Portugal, in the dark and it hit me just how far I was going to have to walk. I wondered how I had allowed myself to have such a crazy idea to walk alone all that way. But, then I began and I saw the sunrise, I saw a city coming alive, I saw a river flowing by, I saw sights and sounds, birds and animals and flowers that amazed me and my excitement returned. I saw a lot of variety all the way to Santiago de Compostela and then even further out to Finisterra. I met amazing interesting people from all over the world. And I discovered I could do it, bit by bit, day by day even on those days of frustration I made it through.

What are you facing today that frightens you, is it a loss of a loved one, a new way of having to do business, moving to a new town, a broken relationship? Can you look at it differently with excitement, seeing the challenge, but not allowing it to overwhelm you but lift you up. To see whatever it is in a new light and think about how in five years when you look back you will say to yourself, I handled that well or I did that well, or here I am in this fabulous new relationship, or I lost this loved one, but I had so many good memories to hold on to to lift me to the light when the darkness of grief closed in that I am grateful for the love and the life I shared with that person.

So, are you afraid or excited? You decide!

Posted by

 

Nick Vandekar
Nick is a Tredyffrin Easttown Residential and Commercial REALTOR selling The Main Line, Chester, Delaware and Montgomery Counties.

Giving you the confidence to make
the right decisions.

225 W Uwchlan Ave
Downingtown , PA 19335
Office 484-237-2055
SellingTheMainLine.com
Mobile: (610) 203-4543 [call or text me]
Email Me

 

My Blog

   

If you are buying or selling on or around
Tredyffrin Easttown or along the Main Line, 
I can help you, contact me.

Comments(27)

Nina Hollander, Broker
Coldwell Banker Realty - Charlotte, NC
Your Greater Charlotte Real Estate Broker

Nice post, Nick. I don't consider fear and excitement necessarily mutually exclusive. Both can be at play at the same time.

Sep 12, 2024 05:42 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Absolutely Nina, heights make me very nervous/afraid, now I am thinking about approaching them with excitement, but there will still be some fear amidst the excitement. Same as on a roller coaster.

Sep 12, 2024 07:08 AM
Wayne Martin
Wayne M Martin - Oswego, IL
Real Estate Broker - Retired

Good morning Nick. Congrats on your ventures. Sounds like you started a bit afraid but determined and let the bar move toward excitement until afraid disappeared. It all began with the first step. Enjoy your day.

Sep 12, 2024 05:50 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Wayne as I set out I was thinking how stupid I had been to have this idea, now I know how great it was, so I am so happy that I allowed the excitement to carry me along.

Sep 12, 2024 07:09 AM
Jeffrey Richman
Immediate Home Solutions - Myrtle Beach, SC
Creative Real Estate Specialist

Hi Nick,

Thank you for your post today.  I am both afraid and excited, but needed your words today

Sep 12, 2024 06:24 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Jeffrey we can be both at the same time, just lean into the excitement and let it carry you along. Like a roller coaster there is fear, but then excitement takes over

Sep 12, 2024 07:11 AM
Ed Silva, 203-206-0754
Mapleridge Realty, CT 203-206-0754 - Waterbury, CT
Central CT Real Estate Broker Serving all equally

As we grow up we developed the ability to better distinguish our confrontations and how to manage them 

only with experience and maturity do we approach those hurdles  we understand which we can jump and which we negotiate around 

I stood in the grounds of the Santiago de Compostela and thought I of you adventure

Sep 12, 2024 07:10 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

The city is wonderful, I am looking forward to going back in 2026 with my wife Ed.

Sep 12, 2024 07:12 AM
Andrew Mooers | 207.532.6573
MOOERS REALTY - Houlton, ME
Northern Maine Real Estate-Aroostook County Broker

You wake up and approach each day with a choice. Your thoughts shape the outcome of the day ahead. See the day you wish to unfold and capture your thoughts to stay positive and on task. Count your blessings and it is always one step, one foot ahead of the other piece meal for the best overall results or experience Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543. I have hiking shoes just like those.. KEEN?

Sep 12, 2024 07:11 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

They did the job Andrew, they were Merrill's but I got really bad blisters, I now use Keane's, feel much better. And yes, we decide how we will respond, rather than react.

Sep 12, 2024 07:14 AM
Michael J. Perry
KW Elite - Lancaster, PA
Lancaster, PA Relo Specialist

Change makes things interesting. As far as Buyer Agents go , they will have to prepare their buyers to possibly paying some of their Brokerage Fee . Right now it might seem strange to Buyers , but later in 2025 buyers will have heard about this from Several Agents !!!    

Sep 12, 2024 07:37 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Michael J Perry exactly, this provides an opportunity to build rapport with clients and get referrals. I read recently about a buyer who gave his agent a bonus after the deal was completed as he felt the agent had worked hard and deserved to get paid.

Sep 12, 2024 07:41 AM
Roy Kelley
Retired - Gaithersburg, MD

When we overcome challenges, we are usually thankful that we accomplished our goals. Thanks for sharing some of your personal experience.

Sep 12, 2024 07:41 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Roy it always feels good to accomplish a goal. However big they are fear should not put us off attempting the impossible, just make it I'm possible!

Sep 12, 2024 07:43 AM
Chris Lima
Turtle Reef Realty - Port St Lucie, FL
Local or Global-Allow me to open doors for you.

This is my inspiration for the day/YEAR!  

Sep 12, 2024 09:02 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Wow! Thank you very much.

Sep 12, 2024 09:37 AM
Ginger Harper
Coldwell Banker Sea Coast Advantage~ Ginger Harper Real Estate Team - Southport, NC
Your Southport~Oak Island Agent~Brunswick County!

Great job.  I have a 60 year old son in law that ran a marathon 3 years ago and now has that 26.2 miles tattooed on the calf of his leg.  He still runs some, but will not do a marathon again. 

Sep 12, 2024 09:17 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Ginger, I never ran another, but did walk and on my Camino I averaged 23 miles a day for a month. Not quite a marathon a day but almost.

Sep 12, 2024 09:38 AM
Peter Tamura
Coldwell Banker Select - Tulsa, OK
BANNOCHIE TEAM

Hi Nick,

Same shoes I wore to hike the Grand Canyon from North to South rim!

I battle procrastination on some of my grand plans/ideas.

There is a great saying attributed to Joseph Campbell,

The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek

Sep 12, 2024 11:20 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

I like that quote, now if you approach it with excitement rather than fear think of the possibilities.

Sep 12, 2024 11:56 AM
Edward Gilmartin
CRE - Boston, MA

You can actually do a lot of damage to your body running a marathon. Running for hours and hours in the heat can actually be fatal…hyponatremia

Sep 12, 2024 01:14 PM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Edward there are lots of things people can do that are dangerous to their bodies, even drinking too much water can actually be dangerous. The main thing is to train and be prepared and not get overwhelmed when things don't go as planned.

Sep 12, 2024 01:16 PM
Leanne Smith
Dirt Road Real Estate - Golden Valley, AZ
The Grit and Gratitude Agent

Congratulations on the feature. For me I remember this acronym for FEAR - False Evidence Appearing Real. Later when I thought about the opposite, I revised the acronym of FEAR - Feeling Excited and Ready.

Sep 12, 2024 01:24 PM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Oh I love that, very clever, I will have to use that going forward.

Sep 12, 2024 01:37 PM
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

Nick- what a wonderful post and I love how you shared your fear and excitement with us. I've found that when I fear doing some things, such as the first time I drove our boat by myself, the fear leaves and the excitement of having accomplished this makes the fear seem like nothing. We can't let fear stop us...look at what we'd miss. 

Sep 12, 2024 07:01 PM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Absolutely agree Kathy, well put.

Sep 13, 2024 07:25 AM
Endre Barath, Jr.
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices California Properties - Beverly Hills, CA
Realtor - Los Angeles Home Sales 310.486.1002

Nick, I always face obstacles head on and learned not to be afraid of anything, rather figure out how to overcome the challenges or obstacles. I guess it goes back to my days of jumping out of Airplanes and Helicopters.... I was sitting in the bleachers at Airborne School and the demonstration jumpers did their thing.... sadly, one's parachute tangled up like a cigar roll and he crashed and died in front of us. '

It was a voluntary course, and half the bleachers walked and quit. I stayed and between Airborne school and Ranger school I have 10 jumps under my belt. Endre

Sep 12, 2024 09:04 PM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

My son parachuted as  RECON Marine, not liking heights I am not sure that is something I could get excited about YET.

Sep 13, 2024 07:26 AM
Dr. Paula McDonald
Beam & Branch Realty - Granbury, TX
Granbury, TX 936-203-0279

Nick, I love this post so much. I ran one marathon years ago and hit the wall exactly where you did, mile 19. It was so mentally and physically tough to complete the final miles. I have been intrigued about the Camino walks. I may need to reach out and get more information. Have a great weekend.

Sep 13, 2024 04:59 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

You are welcome to reach out anytime, I have a series of posts from when I did it here in the Rain too.

Sep 13, 2024 07:27 AM
Barbara Michaluk
Weichert Realtors | Phone Direct 240-506-2434 | 301-681-0550 office - Silver Spring, MD
Leisure World Specialist / Full Service REALTOR

Hi Nick, This is so true for most of us who find ourselves at the fork in the road when approaching something new. It can be exciting but most of us stop and question our decision about trying something new.

Sep 13, 2024 05:07 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

As Kathy Streib said above, but then you have to think what you might miss. It makes me think about that saying, paraphrased, If you think you can't, you can't, but if you think you can, you can.

Sep 13, 2024 07:28 AM
Carol Williams
Although I'm retired, I love sharing my knowledge and learning from other real estate industry professionals. - Wenatchee, WA
Retired Agent / Broker / Prop. Mgr, Wenatchee, WA

Hi Nick,
What a great post! I love that you faced your fears and just did it anyway.  I think we all get overwhelmed by the bigness of some of our ambitions and become intimidated as we embark on a new journey or goal.

So many things in life are like eating an elephant. It can only be done one bite at a time.

Sep 13, 2024 05:25 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Carol that is very true, breaking something down into smaller bites also allows us to celebrate reaching those smaller goals and not get discouraged by how long it is taking to reach the end goal.

Sep 13, 2024 07:29 AM
John Juarez
The Medford Real Estate Team - Fremont, CA
ePRO, SRES, GRI, PMN

You have some great memories Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543 because you did not allow yourself to be stopped from accepting big challenges.

Sep 16, 2024 03:19 PM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Thank you John, I appreciate the comment.

Sep 17, 2024 07:48 AM
Wanda Kubat-Nerdin - Wanda Can!
Red Rock Real Estate (435) 632-9374 - St. George, UT
The best agent in Southern Utah!

Taking charge when life comes at you fast is the best way to handle them. You've done just that, Nick. Well done and congrats on the feature!

Sep 18, 2024 11:21 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

Thanks Wanda for reading and for the compliment.

Sep 18, 2024 11:49 AM
Hannah Williams
HomeStarr Realty - Philadelphia, PA
Expertise NE Philadelphia & Bucks 215-820-3376

Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543 Positive thinking will get you through every time 

Sep 22, 2024 09:25 AM
Nick Vandekar, 610-203-4543

There is no point to focus on the negative, so positive is the way to go.

Sep 23, 2024 07:33 AM