Patricia Feager and Lew Corcoran are hosting a March challenge which is about Sharing the Gift of Who You Are. Our challenge is to share the impact someone had which helped shape who we are today. Similar to several other posters, I've just got to start this challenge by talking about my dad, Pat Cooney.
Or better yet, maybe I should start by talking about who I am, because who shaped me impacted the me I am today. So...
- I am independent, totally fine with doing things by myself. Ask me about the time I took myself to Baltimore Harbor for a weekend trip which included attending a spur-of-the-moment Oriole's game and enjoying the restaurants and aquarium. Or the time I flew to a spa on a Caribbean island, again alone. I've gone to movies alone many times. I'm of the mindset that if you want to do something, don't let not having company stop you!
- I do what I say I will do. I honor my commitments. If I tell you I'm going to do something, you can be sure it'll happen.
- I'm early for almost everything. At the very least, I'm never late. This kind of goes with previous comment. If I say I'll be there at 10am, I'll by there BY 10am.
- I make decisions, I'm not afraid to do hard things, or to say what I think. I think about what I'm doing. There's a reason for everything I do.
- I'm curious. I'm adventurous. I love trying and learning new things. I am a voracious reader.
- I like to laugh and do it often.
So can I "blame" my dad, Pat Cooney, for instilling any of those traits in me? Yes, yes, I can.
So here are just a few things I will share about my memories of my dad, specifically those that had a part in the traits above.
In terms of never being late - My dad would stand near the door tapping his watch and stating, "Cooneys are never late!" I still get a bit anxious if I'm rushing out the door at the last minute. And it's not really the last minute. It's always early but to me it feels late.
Then there's the curious/adventurous/learning new things Dad. My dad and mom were both very smart, and they encouraged us to think for ourselves so we were always learning things. We had a set of encyclopedias and if we wanted to know about a topic, we had to look it up or go to the library. If we wanted to know how to spell a word, we had to look it up ourselves (the argument "But how am I supposed to look it up if I don't know how to spell it?" didn't work!). We went to the library weekly.
Also, my dad set a great example by always learning new things and being adventurous. He learned all about stamp collecting and became a serious collector. He got a motorcycle license when I was a young teenager. He picked me up one day when I was walking to a friends house - I didn't even know he had a bike or a license. I just heard a motorcycle slowing down behind me and when he got to me, he said, "Hey, wanna ride?" He handed me a helmet and off we went. That was a fun day. Then he got a pilot's license for airplanes and we were able to go in the air many times. He even took the entire girl scout troop up in the plane, one at a time. Our family also always went on an annual camping trip, always somewhere new so we got to explore different areas of our country and learn all about nature.
And then there were all the lessons that shaped me into me. I remember one day Dad was letting me "help" him in his workshop. I was trying to put two things together and it just wasn't working so I was trying to force it into place. He told me, "Hon, if something isn't working, don't ever try to force it. Just take a breath, and then look at it and try something different." That's so true, not just about tools and parts. It's true about people and relationships. You cannot ever force someone to like you, or be the way you want them to be. All you can do is take a breath, look at the situation, and try something different. Lots of time we feel stuck but we're not really stuck. We just don't want to do anything about it.
My Dad also encouraged me to be independent. He would tell me that no one is responsible for me. I'm responsible for everything I do or decide. When those traits are instilled in you as a young person, they remain.
As for laughter, I remember lots of laughter growing up. Mom and Dad loved each other and demonstrated it regularly. There were belly laughs, and there were chuckles. They would have house parties, and there would be lots of laughter going on. We'd listen in on Dad and his friend Nick who would play tricks on each other, especially as it related to Christmas gifts.
So if there is any one thing I'd say to my dad, Pat Cooney, if he were around today, it would be simple. Thank you Dad.
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