💸 Because what’s the POINT if you can’t use fake money to solve real estate’s real problems?
That’s right. I logged into my imaginary ActiveRain account, found the "Make it Rain" button, and BAM 💥 ... I gave myself 1,000,000 points.
And now?
I’m giving it all away. Every last pixel of it. Because the real estate gods demand tribute and I’m your weird, shirtless point fairy 🧚♂️ (Kidding!)
🪙 First 100,000 Points
🐶💥 Bathroom Listing Enforcer: Tiny Dog, Big Justice!
You know the type ... a purse-sized Chihuahua, trembling with rage and self-importance, decked out in a rhinestone collar and tiny doggles. Cute? Sure. But this isn’t just any accessory pup. No, this is Vengeance in a Vest.
Trained to launch a surgical ankle strike at any agent reckless enough to post a listing photo with the toilet lid up, the seat up, or worse ... evidence of... "recent activity." 💩🚽
And we’re serious about this. 🎯 100,000 ActiveRain points go to the first agent who trains their pint-sized warrior to patrol open houses for photographic crimes against porcelain dignity.
Bonus points if it’s caught on video. Double bonus if the offender screams and drops their overpriced oat milk latte.
Because what’s the point of real estate photos if they don’t say, “Buy this home,” instead of “Don’t sit down here unless you’re brave?”
🪙 100,000 Points
To anyone brave enough to hire a full-blown mariachi band ... sombreros, brass, and heartbreak ... and send them marching straight into the buyer’s office after submitting a 42% under-asking offer. 🎺💔
Let the **music of shame** blast through the cubicles as the buyer tries to explain to their coworkers why they thought $298,000 was reasonable for a $500,000 listing with a pool, new roof, and hand-carved front door from Sedona. 🌵🏠
Bonus points if the lead trumpet belts out *Cielito Lindo* every time the buyer tries to talk. Double bonus if someone throws rose petals. 🌹
Because if your offer stinks, it might as well come with a soundtrack.
🪙 100,000 Points
To anyone who drives a lifted monster truck over a Prius parked in front of the open house sign. Extra points if you yell, “This is my showing appointment now!”
⁉️🙋♀️ If you had a blank check in terms of "points" – let's say, 100,000 redeemable points 🌟 ... to tackle a huge real estate headache, what single, pressing problem would you pay to solve? 🏡
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