Scene: Facebook Messenger ā Where Randomness Meets Mr. Cheese
š§š§š§
HER Random DM to Me (an Estate Sale Owner):
Add me to your vendor list. Here's my info.
ME (cheerfully confused):
Well⦠hello to you too! I donāt know you, but why donāt you give me a call and introduce yourself? Then maybe Iāll see if weād work together in the future.
HER (5 hours later):
Whatās your number?
ME (channeling Steve Martin with a smirk):
Hmmm⦠if only there was an āAboutā section on my profile. Orādare I say itāan online search engine where you can type in questions and it⦠answers them! (pauses for dramatic eyebrow lift)
Narrator (me, internally):
My phone number is plastered all over Facebook and Google like bad wallpaper. Still, I try to paste her my full digital business cardā¦
HER (suddenly melting down like a popsicle in Phoenix):
Instead of having a sense of humor or showing some moxie...
"Never mind. Youāre not very friendly"...andĀ BLOCKED ME!
ME (to the empty chat box):
Iām sorryāwhat just happened? You solicited me, then blocked me⦠Thatās like knocking on someoneās door, asking for a cup of sugar, and then screaming āHOW DARE YOU!ā when I point to the sugar jar on the counter.
Now for the "who moved my cheese" moment, I figured if she was ambitious and proactive enough to easily find my number and call me, I was going to refer her to my REALTOR friend that had just asked me at broker caravan this morning for a referral to an estate sale / "declutterer" for her 4,800 sq ft Rancho Santa Fe listing.
Cue sad trombone. šŗ
TGIF!!!


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