“Desire is the starting point of all achievement.”
Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich
I heard that quote again today while listening to The Gospel According to Doug Jones, a sermon by the Reverend William Curtiss. Hearing it stopped me cold.
When I was young, I was what most people would call very successful. I could have retired at 50. We owned our home in San Jose, a home on the Big Island of Hawaii, and a home near Yosemite.
Then life turned.
I went through a long period of defeating myself, bad decision after bad decision. The crash of 2008 lasted only about 18 months, but it took me twelve years to pay off the business debts that followed. During that time, I lost confidence. I lost enthusiasm. And as I got older, I began to lose energy and desire.
The only desire I had left was to stop, close down, and retire defeated.
Three years ago, several Mortgage Magic loan agents and real estate agents asked me not to shut the company down, but simply to reduce it to the bare minimum and keep it going. I did but my only motivation was to break even. Just survive. There was no zest. No enthusiasm.
Slowly, and for the first time in years, something has changed. This year I felt a small spark return. I realized I don’t want my exit from this life to be as someone who gave up.
I’ll be 78 in a couple of months. I may fall flat on my face. But I am choosing to try to create desire again, and to rebuild confidence and enthusiasm.
When I was 11 years old, I looked up my name, Douglas Michael, in the library. I remember the meaning as “up from the deep to walk with God.”
To me, that means Faith, Love, Joy, and Enthusiasm.
That’s where I’m headed.
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