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Active listening

By
Services for Real Estate Pros with BestAgentTV.com

Active listening is a behavior. Poor listening creates tension, while active listening builds rapport and trust with a customer. There are three skills to remember in active listening:

1. Feeling: This is the ability to recognize silent messages that the customer is sending through vocal intonation, body language and facial expressions.

2. Acknowledging: This is the act of receiving and acknowledging the customer’s message and feelings. Accepting that message as true and valid, without judgment of content.

3. Responding: This is the process of giving and inviting feedback to determine the accuracy of the customer’s message and feelings. The active listener tries to understand the customer’s problem or concern.

Now that you know the skills involved with active listening, there are six rules to incorporate into your active listening skill set:

1. Limit Your Own Talking: Listening is just that: being quiet and allowing someone else to talk. In active listening, you will be limiting how much you say while letting the client have the floor to communicate his needs, issues, ideas, or concerns. By staying focused on what they are saying, you will have a better comprehension of what your customer needs or wants.

2. Don’t interrupt: It’s hard not to step in and interrupt, because a lot of the time we have something to say that will help make our point, but by doing so, we show a lack of courtesy and respect to the speaker. Customer’s who are interrupted don’t feel heard, which will only create greater challenges in your business relationship. Sometimes we think we know exactly what the customer is trying to convey so we interrupt by finishing their sentence or answering a question that hasn’t even been asked. (See point number 3.)

3. Watch for Non-verbal Communication: 7% of what the client is speaking is verbal, 38% can be heard through their tone, while 55% will be seen in their body language. Add that all up and you have 93% of a message that is conveyed entirely by body language and tone – not what they are actually saying. Look for body languages that indicate boredom (yawning, avoiding eye contact, etc.). Body language may also indicate that they don’t agree with you or they are getting upset (crossed arms, squinted eyes, etc.) Be very aware of what your customer is non-verbally saying to you.

4. Don’t Formulate a Response: As anyone talks to us, our mind is always ticking away with an automatic response. Almost anything someone says, we are formulating a plan on how to respond. When we do this, we aren’t actually paying attention to everything that is being said. Instead, listen carefully; you just may discover that your initial response wasn’t appropriate, because you didn’t hear the full details.

5. Talk in a Conducive Setting: It’s hard to communicate with anyone when there multiple distractions around you: phones ringing, people walking by or coming into your office, the office is cold or too hot, or you have distracting habits like clicking a pen, or jingling change in your pocket. These types of distractions makes anyone feel unheard.

6. Paraphrase: No, it’s not rude to rephrase what’s just been said to you, because this shows the client that you not only listened to what he had to say, but you also heard and understood what was said. Too many problems are unresolved, or too many mistakes are made because we didn’t understand what someone was telling us. By rephrasing what was said, the customer will either agree, or correct your interpretation. When someone asks, “Do you understand?” or “Does that make sense?”, rather than saying yes, a good way to respond is to say, “I want to make sure I understand you fully…” or “I think I understand, but let me just make sure…” and then paraphrase what the client communicated.

A good sales person knows exactly the right things to say to sell a product or service. But a successful sales person will gain valuable insight of what the customer wants by actively listening and then sells the customer-appropriate product or service.

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Keith Goodman
Keith Goodman - Merced, CA

Active listening should be our number one goal in our business of building relationships. It is critical in any negotiations or as I said in relationship building. Thanks, keith

Aug 27, 2008 05:29 AM
Bill C. Merrell
Merrell Institute ~ Appraisal Education Network - Bohemia, NY
Ph.D. - Merrell Institue

Great Advise- I have knowledge of many of these aspecst.

The secret is to really listen.

Thanks for the great blog.

Keep on blogging and have a wonderful day.

All the best.

Bill

www.merrellinstitute.com

Aug 27, 2008 05:36 AM
Mott Marvin Kornicki
Waterway Realtors® • Notary Public & Apostille - Sunny Isles, FL
Miami Notary & Apostille 786-229-7999

I agree with the subject line! More sales and relationships are lost by talking too much and listening too little. I guess that is why G-D gave us TWO ears and just ONE mouth!

 

Aug 27, 2008 05:55 AM