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...and then depression set in.

By
Real Estate Agent with Keller Williams Greater Athens

Sometimes I feel like I'm leading a double life.   There's the life I enjoy at the office, where I'm part of a team and I feel like I'm really building toward something.   And then there's my home life, where my wife is in a constant panic that we are going to lose the farm (even though we have never been late on a payment).   My wife is risk adverse, has a low tolerence for uncertainty and I don't think she will ever feel comfortable until I get a job that comes with a salary... yuck.   Between us, my two partners and I have just under ten million in listings.   And while I consider myself, at this stage of the game, to be the working poor.  I think our listings indicate that we are at least working toward something.   But at home, insted of being respected as the king of my castle, I'm treated like the "king of the road".  

"I sing, Trailers for sale or rent
Rooms to let, fifty cents
No phone, no pool, no pets
I ain't got no cigarettes
Ah, but, two hours of pushin' broom
Buys an eight by twelve four-bit room
I'm a man of means by no means
King of the road."

Lorena McMullen
3DX Real Estate - Novi, MI
Serving SE Michigan

Sounds to me like she needs to feel secure that her nest is not going to fall out of the tree so to speak. 

It might help if you sat down with her, tell her you know she has been worrying and you want to ease her fears. Show her the inventory you are carrying, your projected income, and you plan to get the inventory sold, that would be a good start.  She needs to feel secure and god knows, living on commission only sales, scares most people to death. 

Get her involved in the business. Make her a part of your team. Have her help address postcards or whatever.  You both have the same goal - to be successful and prosperous.  Set a weekly date night and NEVER break the date - even if it's just watching a movie together or taking a walk, spend time making plans,setting goals, talking and dreaming....It would be a good start on regaining your crown I bet!

Good Luck.

 

 

Sep 02, 2008 06:53 PM
Donna Yates
BHGRE - Metro Brokers - Blue Ridge, GA
Blue Ridge Mountains

It takes perseverance, that's for sure.  It's not for the faint hearted but I do understand where your wife is coming from.  I commend her for wanting to be so responsible and I admire you for keeping with it.  This storm is bound to break at some point and want it be a great dividend for those of us who stick with it.  There are no guarantees in life so we have to learn to roll with the punches. 

Sep 02, 2008 10:07 PM
xxx x
Albany, NY

I feel for you Lincoln. Growing a business takes time and it's scary as heck. Try to keep her focused on the future and what your life will be.

Sep 02, 2008 10:23 PM
Chip Jefferson
Gibbs Realty and Auction Company - Columbia, SC

Tough one. I know how she feels. My husband has been self employed for most of our lives leaving a salary job after our first child. I had the same inhibitions. Then I went self employed and realized the pressure he was under.

Sep 02, 2008 10:44 PM
Lincoln Lindsey
Keller Williams Greater Athens - Athens, GA

Next time I hear a discouraging word about real estate agents, I'm going to direct the speaker to the response on this blog post.   Here is proof that all agents aren't jaded, hacks.   I appricate the thoughtful replies to my post, active rain continues to impress me as an actual caring community.

Sep 03, 2008 02:52 AM
Liz Moras Migic
Chilliwack, BC
Chilliwack, British Columbia - Realtor

oh my comment has disappeared! :-(  Anyhow I wanted to say that i'm so impressed what people have to say..........thoughtful, empathetic and heartfelt advice!  Very nice to see!  Good luck Lincoln!

Sep 03, 2008 03:38 AM
Lincoln Lindsey
Keller Williams Greater Athens - Athens, GA

Sorry Liz, did I do that?   I didn't mean to erase your comment.  In fact I was really impressed by what you wrote, it was insperational.  

Sep 04, 2008 01:08 PM
Liz Moras Migic
Chilliwack, BC
Chilliwack, British Columbia - Realtor

no worries - as long aS IT wasn't because you didn't like something i said!  :-)  

Sep 05, 2008 06:02 PM
Molly Luttrell
Solid Source Realty GA - Lawrenceville, GA

I understand.  My fiance told me that he would help if I wanted to do this real estate stuff for a year.  Well after a year and six months - he is still helping.  Not real happy with me right now business slow - and lack of motivation

Sep 08, 2008 07:09 AM
Mike Saunders
Retired - Athens, GA

Lincoln - if you want to be depressed, check out my market report for Oglethorpe County. I will be doing Madison also this week. I hope that doesn't depress you more.

My wife is very similar. All that money going out, sell something, get some money coming in. But then, I don't have a 1 year old to support.

Sep 08, 2008 08:22 AM
Fred Griffin Florida Real Estate
Fred Griffin Real Estate - Tallahassee, FL
Licensed Florida Real Estate Broker

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    Surf some blogs, leave some comments.  Better yet, post a Blog.

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Mar 29, 2016 01:38 PM