Take the time to court before marrying.

Real Estate Agent with Rector Hayden, Lexington, Ky

I just read Melissa Gant's rant against sellers who have caused great frustration and a readiness to fire them. I applaud Melissa for taking a stand and getting back to basics.  However I think there are a few things we need to remind ourselves so that we don't work with sellers or buyers that take away our energy and self esteem.  We won't need to fire our clients if we court them before we marry them.

Here is how we should approach all of our potential clients.

1) Set the stage.  Have an intitial consultation with all potential clients. In this market  there is  temptation to gobble the bait and set the hook. 

As a child I used to fish in Rose Lake near our home in North Idaho. We used worms and could easily catch a batch of perch and blue gill.  Perch and blue gill are worm gobblers.  They don't take the time to swim around the bait and give it a little tug occasionally.  No, they attack it.  Even as a five year old I could catch a bluegill or a perch. 

 Realtors must resist the urge to grab the bait. We need to nibble a little and get a flavor for whether this is a potential client that we can serve with integrity.  Will this client zap us of energy or give us a good jolt.

 Last week I received a call from a demanding woman insisting I show  her a property immediately.  Yes, I could have jumped in my car and met her at the property.  I calmly expressed to her I would need to to have a consultation to determine if I was the right consultant for her and if she the right client for me.  She hung up on me.  Good riddance.

This week I received a call from a woman that immediately asked me questions to qualify me.  She was a skilled communicator who knew demands only cause separation.  

The potential money made from this transaction is rather minimal.  However the experience could be energizing.  She also has a large family in Lexington and it is likely she and her family are all socially adept and the kind of people that will bring energy and joy to my life.  Yes, this can be a demanding business but who do we let detemine the demands?

2) Have someone in your life that you trust who will remind you that you are not God's gift to everyone.  All of us have our warts. 

There are times when we are not at our best or that we may be feeling poorly when we would be much better off to delay appointments or refer to another agent. 

There are also people that just don't match our personality.  Working with someone that irritates us may not be the clients fault. 

When I was a teacher I enjoyed observing how certain "challenging students" related to the different teachers.  It was intriguing to me how so many students could relate and behave so differently in different situations.  Sometimes there are people we would be wise to not work with and it is not because of the potential client. 

3)  Set some work parameters and get enough rest to give the highest version of yourself to your clients.  With that said I am going to get ready for a good nights rest. 


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Paul Campbell

The Jubilee Team of Rector Hayden Realtors

Lexington's Green Thumb Realtor

The Jubilee Team,  Paul Campbell and Dorothy LaBar

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Russ Ravary ~ Metro Detroit Realtor call (248) 310-6239
Real Estate One - Commerce, MI
Michigan homes for sale ~ yesmyrealtor@gmail.com

Aw.  Just another woman trying to change a man after we get married instead of accepting who we are and walking away.

Dec 09, 2008 12:43 PM #1
Sheila Moran
RE/MAX Access (Garden Ridge, San Antonio, New Braunfels) - New Braunfels, TX
SanAntonioSheila.com, RE/MAX Access, 210-32


a good message and great examples..

I'll ignore the woman trying to change a man comment from Russ above!

Dec 09, 2008 12:53 PM #2
Kaleb Kunz
Logan, UT

Paul, Great thoughts...in this market with listings I think it's safe to say that we can be a little more selective with who we work with.

Logan Utah Real Estate

Dec 09, 2008 12:58 PM #3
Brian Brumpton
Keller Williams Boise - Boise, ID
Boise Idaho Real Estate


No doubt Melissa's post was written to generate a reaction.  Your thoughts are much more on par with how agents should think and approach situations.  You'll no doubt not collect near as many comments but thanks for sharing anyway.

Dec 09, 2008 01:13 PM #4
Paul Campbell Realtor Lexington
Rector Hayden, Lexington, Ky - Lexington, KY
Kentucky Homes for Sale

Sheila, Kaleb and Brian

Thanks for the affirmation.  I am encouraged when I get even one person who sees the value in something I write.  Happy Holidays! 


Dec 09, 2008 01:20 PM #5
Erby Crofutt
B4 U Close Home Inspections&Radon Testing (www.b4uclose.com) - Lexington, KY
The Central Kentucky Home Inspector, Lexington KY

Great advice often ignored.  Maybe that's why so many are disappointed when it doesn't work out.  They DID hop in their car to go show the house.

Dec 11, 2008 02:11 AM #6
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