Seeing is believing, and typically what we believe we weave. Much has been written about how we are espoused to our thoughts. The mind brings into reality what it thinks about most. We have all heard the stories about people willing themselves to death. The subconscious mind cannot discern what is a positive or what is a negative thought. Filling our minds with negative thoughts (any diffidence) makes the chances of meeting success, remote. We are a self-fulfilling prophecy.
We all know how hard it is to manage our emotions when competing with our daily challenges. Sometimes the stress of the day forces us to search for self-anesthetizing activities which include reaching out to success coaches, attending seminars, listening to self-help gurus, and mentoring from people we love or trust. These folks are great for temporary relief of pain; from the omnipresence of rejection, or help indemnify the pressures you endure trying to meet quota. It's no surprise that Salespeople are a target-market for these "emotional/mental anesthetists".
We visit with these folks and receive our emotional/mental enema and we are cured! Right? After a couple of days what happens? We are right back to focusing on the negatives and why something can't be done. How do we make a permanent change? Well it starts with first realizing that you are going to face rejection daily. Knowing this we can focus on the scientific-term dissociation.
Dissociation can be learned and it starts long before your day begins. The key element to dissociation is focusing on processes as opposed to outcomes. This requires us to learn a strategy and a set of tactics to handle any situation in an optimal way. We need to practice, rehearse and review these processes so we may follow them faithfully. If we focus on processes we cannot be victimized by our emotions. It is when we focus on outcomes that we become attached emotionally. For example, we have experienced situations where afterwards we have said, "If I would have "...and we let these thoughts weigh on our mind long after the experience. We carry this "emotional baggage" with us all day.
We should be focused on the processes that caused this emotion. Life is a process, just activities. These processes (activities) yield results, and these results should be measured intellectually, not emotionally. Remember, the mind cannot distinguish positive or negative thought. Let's not seek emotional support from the processes. "Let us not act on emotion, but act with intelligence." We can get emotional support from those who love and support us. In the next article we will focus on the processes that help us yield positive results.