So this morning I'm sitting there in a room full of fellow Realtors in our Manhattan Beach office conference room trying to keep up with this sharp, fast talking loan broker holding court about the ins and outs of present day loans. He says that generally most banks want a tremendous amount of documentation, need to see a years worth of mortgage payments in the bank and these days they pick appraisers from some list instead of local, more appropriate appraisers. Being the social animal that I am I chime in, these days appraisals are not a problem. That’s all I said. You could hear a pin drop for what seemed like several hours and the broker turns to me with this quizzical look. I’m terrified, something’s wrong! I look around to see an uncomfortable smile slowly forming on my fellow Realtor's faces and it's like the room is slowly slipping into the Twilight Zone…and I'm dying. A millennium later he says in an uncharacteristic slow cadence, n o , t h e s e d a y s a p p r a i s a l s a r e a r e a l p r o b l e m because appraisals are coming in too low. He didn’t get it. I'm mortified but I forge on in a daze, what I meant was as prices go up then...no I mean as prices go down and the appraisals take into account...Everyone starts cracking up, swooping in for the kill, yea Mori that's it...I'm proud to have Mori as my agent...how long have you been doing this? As self-protection I take on a cool Mori attitude, look around and say with a perplexed but confident expression, I must be still dreaming in bed and you guys aren't real, right? Polite, self-conscious laughter, and the broker moves on to the subject of contingent sales. Now, what I meant to say was that if prices are at one level and a house is sold at a much lower level, which is starting to happen, then an appraisal is no problem because the subject house is below market value and will appraise with no problem. So why didn’t I just say that?! Oh you cruel curve ball of life, why does thy sting leave a big red spot on my heart? I know this never happens to all you perfect people out there, but you guys also never get to write about it, like I just did.
Mori Biener, GRI, CRS
South Bay Brokers
Mr. Neighborhood of the South Bay
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