So I'm on brokers open houses this past Friday and it's time to have a looksee at a $10 mil house in the ritzy Hill Section of Manhattan Beach...my favorite fantasy dream house...and this house was great!; large, modern indoor/outdoor living with panoramic views of the Pacific to dye for. I'm walking around in my socks (shouldn't streak that gorgeous expensive wood floor), stuffing my face with a gourmet sandwich, imagining my being the suave head of the house. That sandwich is melting in my mouth as I walk down the wooden steps, WHEN NEXT THING I KNOW I'm sliding down stair after wooden stair on my side and landing flat on my ass with the sandwich extending upright in my mouth. You OK?, everybody's asking. Wawawawa, I say because I'm in shock and just lying there frozen with that damned sandwich firmly planted in my kisser. How embarrassing! Two guys grab me under my arms and lift me up. I spit the sandwich, which didn't have much of a flavor anymore,with some difficulty into a garbage can and rest on the first chair I can find. Both listing agents are fluttering around me, looking very worried. You OK? Guys, I say (I think out loud), this house...IT'S MINE! Nervous laughter (or did I imagine it?). I say I'm fine and hobble out bleary eyed. Next day Robyn lets out a shriek at the site of a humongous black and purple cheek-wide raspberry engulfing my side. Of course as all women curiously do, she has just the right cream for it. So what's the lesson here fellow Realtors? DON'T HAVE THE MAID OIL THE WOOD FLOORS BEFORE AN OPEN HOUSE! Other no no's at an open house; warn people about any possible dangers in viewing the house and DON'T HAVE THE MAID OIL THE WOOD FLOORS BEFORE AN OPEN HOUSE!
Mori Biener, Mr. Neighborhood of the South Bay
South Bay Brokers
310-418-9188
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