Being Negative. Is it for you?

Real Estate Agent with RE/MAX of Valencia CA - Paris911 BRE# 01238257

Please, if you are named one of the following, I mean no offence.

There are people that you run across in life that fit different descriptions.  You have the "doubting Thomas", "Nosie Nellies", Chatty Cathy's, all of which are fun at times, but can be a bit of distraction. 

However, none of the above can compare with a person that seems to have a cloud of negativity surrounding them 24/7.  I remember working in a police car, for 8, 10, 12, or more hours.  I was very positive and still am today, not matter what the circumstance, I basically am thankful for very minor things, like being able to breathe, then I expand the list.  Back to the police car.  When I was mister Happy and Optimistic, and I was working with someone that was one step from self burial, after about 4 hours I find myself in the very same boat.  I wanted to buy a shovel and go at it with Mr. Negative.

Why is it that Negative seems to always overpower the positive.  Why is that a bad word, criticism, or verbal assaults distract us much more than someone saying "hey you look nice today", or "great job"?  I have done a lot in this business for the past 10 years and now that I have my two hands on it, I have begun to clean house.  I do not need any one that I am associated with that is negative.  I want happy, peppy, people that are as excited about being able to have their heart-beat and ability to tell when they have to go the bathroom as I am.  Examples of Positive Pete's on Active Rain would be Jeff Turner and Martin Rodriguez, read their blogs, you will leave with a feeling of running barefoot through daisies...

Where have the thankful gone?  Are they inside in their closet?  I think not, I think we need to remove ourselves and share the happiness to all we know.  No matter what the circumstance, you have a choice on how you react.  You can let it bother you, cripple you, paralyze you, or you can acknowledge it and move forward.  Remember, looking back causes you to take your focus off of your goal.  Lets not do that. 

Lets share our HAPPINESS with those close to you and every total stranger you encounter.



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Joan Whitebook
BHG The Masiello Group - Nashua, NH
Consumer Focused Real Estate Services
Negativity doesn't help anyone move forward.  I think having a postive attitude is key!  I am glad you wrote a post on this topic and hope all is well.
May 08, 2007 03:01 PM #7
Christy Powers
Keller Williams Coastal Area Partners - Pooler, GA
Pooler, Savannah Real Estate Agent
I am not a Negative Nancy, although I'm not a perky positive petunia. I would like to think I am well balanced.
May 08, 2007 03:13 PM #8
Jordan M. Mackey
Overland Park Real Estate (No association with Inc) - Overland Park, KS
Overland Park Real Estate ::
HAHA  Great post!  I need to pass this along to a couple people in my office :-P
May 08, 2007 03:40 PM #9
Toby Boyce
C.G. Boyce Real Estate Co. - Delaware, OH
MBA, Delaware Ohio

I just finished reading Jeffrey Gitomer's "Little Gold Book of Yes! Attitudes" and would strongly suggest it to anyone else.

He suggests that you begin the day with 15 minutes of reading and writing about positive things. I've added another section, a "siesta" in the mid-afternoon when the pressure of the day starts to push us down.

Another suggestion is that you shouldn't watch the news. If you watch 1 hour per day it would account for 2 weeks per year that you could have diverted that information to something more productive. Which would have yielded more sales and more positive flow.

May 08, 2007 04:16 PM #10
D'Adrea Davie

I enjoyed your feature and agree 100 and 10 percent. It's nice to come across Realtors that are peppy, upbeat and who can be positive even in not so good situations. Sometimes we can take ourselves too seriously. The best tip I received in sales is to always make a positive out of a negative. Thanks for the article.

May 08, 2007 04:34 PM #11
Chuck Dellorto
Coldwell Banker - Serving INDIANA & ILLINOIS - Highland, IN
"Talk To Chuck"

Sometimes the best medicine is a smiling face!! So much negative really does dissolve the positive force in a situation. There are some people, no matter what the situation, they just complain and are always negative. I really think they do not know they are like that.

But there are the one's out there that know they are like that, they are miserable human beings. Don't mean to get rough here, but I just get sick of the WHINERS and I associate with the WINNERS. You know who you time you look in the mirror, think about your day and how you were a downer to everyone all day long...SMILE TO YOURSELF IN THE will change your life.

May 08, 2007 05:02 PM #12
Doreen McPherson
Homesmart ~ Scottsdale ~ Tempe - Tempe, AZ
Phoenix Arizona Real Estate ~

I agree, the negative can be overwhelming and hard to deal with.  It seems to be in too many places these days.  We can only choose for ourselves to see things differently.  It can be very hard to keep going when others focus on what's wrong rather than the positive. 

Pray, God can make a huge difference.  You'd be amazed...


Thanks for sharing.

May 08, 2007 07:42 PM #13
Margaret Rome, Baltimore Maryland
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Hey Conner, " Don't worry, Be Happy"

It is up to all of us to keep the positive around us. And Jeff Turner is a wonderful example! Congratulations on your featured post! 

May 08, 2007 10:24 PM #14
Neal Bloom
Brokered by eXp Realty LLC - Weston, FL
Realtor CRS-Weston FL Real Estate

Congrats on your featured post...and many more!

Welcome to A/R.

May 08, 2007 11:21 PM #15
Jay Burnham
Coldwell Banker - Beverly, MA
The Coldwell Banker Guy

Hi Connor...Hey, the sun's out, the temp is expected to reach the low 80's, I'm listing a property today and I've recently purchased a Segway PT.  What is there to be negative about!?  Thanks for the post.


May 08, 2007 11:31 PM #16
Tammy Stone
Exactly.... That's what I keep talking about in the posts.  We need to be positive.  YEAH!
May 08, 2007 11:42 PM #17
Diane Bell, Hilton Head Real Estate, Bluffton
Charter 1 Real Estate, Hilton Head, Bluffton, SC - Hilton Head Island, SC
Totally agree!  Our mindset affects everyone around us.....not to say what it does to our business production. 
May 08, 2007 11:53 PM #18
Kay Van Kampen
RE/MAX Broker, RE/MAX - Springfield, MO
Realtor®, Springfield Mo Real Estate
I divorced a husband that would't allow me to laugh and be happy - very negative person - I run when I'm around someone that reeks negativity.
May 09, 2007 12:05 AM #19
Kat DeLong
LakeView Realty Enterprises, Inc - Lake Arrowhead, CA
Realtor DRE#01235311, Lake Arrowhead Real Estate (
Wow--I NEED to pass this along to my "Chatty Cathy" client.  Thanks for reminding us to be positive!
May 09, 2007 12:56 AM #20
Connor T. MacIvor
RE/MAX of Valencia CA - Paris911 - Valencia, CA - (888)SCVnest

Thank you for all of the wonderful, kind and very inspirational responses.

This is why I am associated with Active Rain, for the GREAT, POSITIVE, KIND, CONSIDERATE, and (fill in your own personal word that denotes the pure essence of being a beacon in the darkness that outshines everything).

Your all wonderful!!!

May 09, 2007 07:35 AM #21
Ryan Hukill - Edmond
ShowMeOKC Real Estate Pros of KW Elite - Edmond, OK
Realtor, Team Lead
Great post Connor. The positive can be contagious. We just have to keep on keeping on! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Some days it does seem like the negative nellies are everywhere but the truth is, they just stand out more. We have to work hard to outnumber them.
May 09, 2007 11:35 AM #22
Robert Kerr
Kerr Financial - Warwick, RI

I find the constantly negative people I meet no more annoying than their constantly cheery counterparts.

I know a few of the latter and it's like dealing with a Stepford wife or a cult member. They've drunk the Prozac Kool-Aid and they're mindlessly happy.

   "Mary, we have to let an employee go."

   "Look outside, Robert, it's a beautfiul day out!"

That drives me crazy sometimes.

May 09, 2007 01:30 PM #23
Chuck Dellorto
Coldwell Banker - Serving INDIANA & ILLINOIS - Highland, IN
"Talk To Chuck"
Robert....ease up
May 09, 2007 05:30 PM #24
Connor MacIVOR

Brother Robert, it seems you have a hidden pain, clear your mind and share your pain with me so we can both grow stronger from the sharing.

The Kool-Aid is not half bad, its okay come into the light.

May 09, 2007 07:13 PM #25
Martin Rodriguez
Pacific Funding - Valencia, CA
Senior Loan Consultant


Excellent point, but here's what the negative people fail to recognize.  Life is about choices. They forget that they're in the drivers seat.   You can choose to be a hubbub or look at life with zest.  It's your choice. 

Those who know to make this distinction will smile on their darkest days.  Its really that simple.

But wait, there's an added bonus. Positive people attract positive people, and the positive energy cycle grows in perpetuity.

Want proof?  This post has been featured -- look at all the comments you have.

It's a Good Life..


May 11, 2007 08:50 PM #26
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