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There's No Such Thing As Fearless

By
Real Estate Agent with Coldwell Banker 69190

 One way or another fear itself motivates everyone.  It causes people to recoil in horror or lash out at everything around them. It causes people to break down or build up. It all really depends on the individual in a given situation and how they handle it. You can embrace things or fight them and either one can be right or wrong at any given moment.

 Fear of the unknown- Much like a fear of change that grips people when they are faced with something new, a fear of the unknown usually causes two distinct reactions. They either attempt to avoid it and or altogether pretend that this unknown thing doesn't exist or they lash out at the unknown with resentment. Either way, the fear of such a thing has motivated the individual with whom it has come in contact with.

 Some people will go to any end necessary to avoid the unknown. Dig themselves into a rut and refuse to except anything new within their protected walls. But somewhere along the way, something find it's way into your bubble and you will have to deal with it. How you do such a thing is in the end entirely up to you.

 Fear of Failure- This is not altogether an uncommon fear, in fact it is somewhat natural to fear failing. It is a harsh reality of life and a bitter pill that too many people have had to swallow. This fear can create people who are afraid to move forward because they do not want to feel the pain of failure. These people rarely manage to go as far as they should for the simple fact that they don't take the chances that would lead them to success in order to avoid failure.

 Of course there are also those that manage to overcome their failure and use it as motivation to move forward in their lives. Not everything is meant to be, but in some ways I feel that everything does happen for a reason and that includes failure. It's not always a bad thing, just a tough lesson that makes us stronger when we get up and brush ourselves off again.

  Fear evokes a reaction from everyone whose path it crosses. Fear itself is not exactly a bad thing, in fact it's quite the logical response to a given stimulus. But no matter what your fears are in this life, the most important thing is keep them from crippling you. You can't go anywhere in this life without moving forward and that's just a fact. Use fear to your advantage, it can be done. No one on Earth is truly fearless, there are just people that control their fear rather than allowing fear to control them.

 

www.jlboney.com

Comments (19)

Kevin Bungert
ReMax Professional Group - East Northport, NY

JL- If you haven't read "Fearless Living" by Rhonda Britten yet, you should!  Absolutely on target with your post!  I've read hundreds, and it is my #1 of all time!  All the best!

Feb 24, 2009 12:34 PM
Jerry Murphy, CRS, SRES
Long Realty West Valley - Anthem, AZ
Anthem, Phoenix, and Scottsdale AZ Real Estate

Good post J.L.   There's a lot of fear out there in the world right now. Whether it's real or imagined it still has affect on people. Which is what we are seeing in our economy.  Too many people too fearful at the same time.  The last time we saw such a reaction was right after 9/11.  We bounced back fairly quickly after that shock. I don't know if we'll bounce back as quickly from this one.  Best of luck.

Feb 24, 2009 12:36 PM
Eric McGowan
Moody, AL

JL, we do have lots to be concerned about now. I agree the "unknown" is a great motivator (I will not call it fear though).

Feb 24, 2009 12:43 PM
Steve Hoffacker
Steve Hoffacker LLC - West Palm Beach, FL
Certified Aging In Place Specialist-Instructor

JL,

As you point out, fear can be motivating. It can also be so pervasive that it's paralyzing. :)

Steve

Feb 24, 2009 12:51 PM
Sharon Lee
Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance - Jonesborough, TN
Retired and loving life

Hi JL-This post is so on target that it is scary. The post I wrote the other day was really all about this.  I let fear paralyze me and keep me in that bubble cut off from most of life.  What happens when you do that is, you are just existing you aren't really living. I'm proud to say I have come a long ways in the last 3 yrs but because of that fear I missed out and life moved forward and I didn't so now I am trying hard to get back into this place called life.  Do I still have fear? YOU betcha, but I'm working on it everyday and moving farther away from what I allowed to keep me prisoner for many years. Sad but true. Thank you for this post. Just reading it reminds me I'm never going back to my life in a bubble. Have a great evening. You are such a wonderful writer. You have a lot of skill and I very much enjoy reading what you write. Keep up the great work. TOP NOTCH!!!

Feb 24, 2009 01:04 PM
Deb Brooks
Brooks Prime Properties Wichita Falls Texas - Wichita Falls, TX

JL. I think fear is known as the root of all negative emotions. Hate, jealously, need, and other icky stuffffff. Fear. I fear fear. BTW, your Diary post was wonderful. I read it three times! Thank you.

Deb

Feb 24, 2009 01:26 PM
Deb Brooks
Brooks Prime Properties Wichita Falls Texas - Wichita Falls, TX

oh yeah, ANGER too...

Feb 24, 2009 01:28 PM
JL Boney, III
Coldwell Banker - Columbia, SC
Columbia, SC Real Estate

Kevin- I can't say that I've read that one, but I'll have to check it out.

Jerry- The road we are on is certainly a long one, but we will bounce back. We always do.

Eric- It is a motivator, that's for sure.

Steve- It all depends on how it affects us.

Sharon- Some times I do alright by posting the right thing at the right time. You are starting to live your life now, and that's the important thing. Bubbles are never the best thing to trap yourself in and I'm glad you found your way out of the one you were in.

Feb 24, 2009 01:34 PM
JL Boney, III
Coldwell Banker - Columbia, SC
Columbia, SC Real Estate

Deb- I think I can agree with you. Fear truly does have the ability to create a ton of negativity.

And create anger too.

Feb 24, 2009 01:35 PM
Kim Southern- "Sold" with Southern Hospitality
Century 21 In the Mountains - Ellijay, GA
Greetings from the North Georgia Mountains!

JL: I think every one of us who is a successful real estate agent in this market works on overcoming fear everyday, not just our own fear, but that of our customers and clients. It is vital that we ahow calm, composure, and most importantly, confidence in the face of the uncertain times we find ourselves in. I suppose you could say that makes us brave.

 Bravery is not the absence of fear, but the will to overcome it. - John Berridge

Feb 24, 2009 11:02 PM
Richard Weisser
Richard Weisser Realty - Newnan, GA
Richard Weisser Retired Real Estate Professional

JL...

You are so right ... I find myself dealing with fear every day! I put a pretty good face forward, but it's getting harder and harder to cover it up!

But what can you do? You either face your fears or give up.

Feb 24, 2009 11:25 PM
JL Boney, III
Coldwell Banker - Columbia, SC
Columbia, SC Real Estate

Kim- We do have a lot of fear out there to overcome. I love that quote.

Richard- Giving up has never been a good option to me.

Feb 25, 2009 12:38 AM
William Feela
WHISPERING PINES REALTY - North Branch, MN
Realtor, Whispering Pines Realty 651-674-5999 No.

I fear very little, but then again I am in great denial!  I try not to show my fear.  It is many times seen as a sign of weakness.   Not a sign you want to show very often!

Feb 25, 2009 12:45 AM
JL Boney, III
Coldwell Banker - Columbia, SC
Columbia, SC Real Estate

Bill- It is seen as a sign of weakness by many people, but many of those people are the most afraid in my opinion.

Feb 25, 2009 01:08 AM
Claude Cross
Homes By Cross, Inc. - Charlotte, NC
Charlotte NC Homes For Sale

Bees can smell fear . Thats why I stay away from bees. Uncertain times like now cause me to be unsettled. Fear can be controlled. Panic is fear run rampant.    good post JL

Feb 25, 2009 01:28 AM
Alyce Martin
The Realty Group, LLC - Albuquerque, NM
Albuquerque - THE Place To Be!

Fear is the great equilizer.  It's a sort of survival mechanism at a very primitive level but it's the irrational fears that handicap us and keep psychiatrists in business. 

Truth is, we're all afraid of something.  We all have insecurities, weaknesses and shortcomings - some people just disguise them better than others.  Some people manipulate these fears, others connect through them. 

(whoa, did I just say all that?) 

Feb 25, 2009 03:55 AM
JL Boney, III
Coldwell Banker - Columbia, SC
Columbia, SC Real Estate

Claude- I think I would stay away from bees too. I will not panic.

Alyce- I have a fear of enclosed places. Yes you did!

Feb 25, 2009 07:59 AM
Jamie Boney
Mungo Homes - Columbia, SC

I have no idea what you are talking about, I have no fears....

Mar 01, 2009 06:54 AM
JL Boney, III
Coldwell Banker - Columbia, SC
Columbia, SC Real Estate

Jamie- Sell that to someone who is buying.

Mar 01, 2009 06:57 AM