Debbie Reynolds, Your Dedicated Clarksville TN Real Estate Agent (Platinum Properties)

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Rainmaker
525,199
Mike & Eve Alexander
Buyers Broker of Florida - Orlando, FL
Exclusively Representing ONLY Orlando Home Buyers

I listen and nod. My job is to find them the right house, if a salacious story accompanies, I listen.

  • I have had cheaters for clients...a house for wife and kids and condo for the mistress.  
  • Husband and wife relocating and buying house.  Husband staying with girlfriend, while wife back home asking me where he is...I know but my lips are sealed.
  • Wife and husband divorcing...I am working with wife to buy new home.  I am also working with husband to find new home.  Wife knows husband is buying new house...husband does not know wife is buying new home.

Lots more stories...keeps this job exciting.

Eve

Jul 01, 2016 04:42 AM
Ambassador
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Bob Crane
Woodland Management Service / Woodland Real Estate, Keller Williams Fox Cities - Stevens Point, WI
Forestland Experts! 715-204-9671

"I am so sorry to hear this, marriage is an important part of life, I hope that you can find a way to work this out.  Will you be able to focus on this project or would it be better to take a break and reschedule?"

Jul 01, 2016 05:44 AM
Ambassador
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Wanda Kubat-Nerdin - Wanda Can!
Prado Real Estate South - St. George, UT
So Utah Residential, Referral & Relocation REALTOR

Change the subject and look for a way out of the room, even if it means crawling through the bathroom window or look at my watch and politely announce an appointment...that is a hard one Debbie!

Jul 01, 2016 04:21 AM
Rainmaker
2,933,467
Nina Hollander
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage - Charlotte, NC
Your Charlotte/Ballantyne/Waxhaw/Fort Mill Realtor

I listen, but don't necessarily engage with advice.  Sometimes, all someone wants is an ear.

Jul 01, 2016 11:31 AM
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Susan Emo
Sotheby's International Realty Canada - Brokerage - Kingston, ON
Kingston and the 1000 Islands Area

With the majority of my business coming from Death and/or Divorce, I'm well used to listening and not taking sides.  It does keep it interesting though as reality is better than fiction most of the time!

Jul 01, 2016 04:54 AM
Rainmaker
435,619
Diana Dahlberg
1 Month Realty - Pleasant Prairie, WI
Real Estate in Kenosha, WI since 1994 262-308-3563

I believe our job is to be good listeners and so I am open to listening, and if I feel it is appropriate I will make a comment and/or say I'll pray for them.

Jul 01, 2016 12:41 PM
Rainmaker
1,523,282
Sybil Campbell
Long and Foster REALTORS® 5234 Monticello Ave Williamsburg, Virginia - Williamsburg, VA
REALTOR® ABR, SFR, SRES Williamsburg, Virginia

I try to listen and be empathetic.  Listening is a big part of our job.

Jul 01, 2016 09:32 AM
Rainmaker
797,059
Troy Erickson AZ Realtor (602) 295-6807
Good Company Real Estate www.ChandlerRealEstate.weebly.com - Chandler, AZ
Your Chandler, Ahwatukee, and East Valley Realtor

Debbie - I will listen and try not to say anything so as to remain neutral. My job is to either help them sell, or buy a home, and I try to keep them focused on that as much as possible. At the same time, I do want them to know that I care about them as people.

Jul 01, 2016 05:45 AM
Rainmaker
1,203,987
Mary Yonkers
Alan Kells School of Real Estate/Howard Hanna Real Estate - Erie, PA
Erie/PA Real Estate Instructor

Agree with Mike & Eve Alexander and Annette Lawrence , Palm Harbor, FL 727-420-4041 Listen, listen, 

Jul 01, 2016 05:12 AM
Rainmaker
2,850,126
Richard Weeks
Dallas, TX
REALTOR®, Broker

Like others have said try and change the subject; however, if a divorce is a possibility I would want to know as much and as soon as possible.

Jul 01, 2016 04:45 AM
Rainmaker
1,551,045
Bob "RealMan" Timm
Ward County Notary Services - Minot, ND
Owner of Ward Co. Notary Services, retired Realtor

As graciously as possible.

Jul 01, 2016 11:35 AM
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Amanda Christiansen
Christiansen Group Realty (260)704-0843 - Fort Wayne, IN
Christiansen Group Realty

I listen and empathize.  People open up to me all the time but I tread lightly when it comes to getting too involved.  

Jul 01, 2016 11:09 AM
Rainmaker
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Mike Rock
Complete Design - Granite Bay, CA
Granite Bay Luxury New Construction...For Less

i looked for the hear no evil , speak no evil, see no evil

Jul 01, 2016 10:38 AM
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Fred Griffin presently on Leave of Absence
Fred Griffin Real Estate - Tallahassee, FL
Licensed Florida Real Estate Broker

  If it is just you and a client of the opposite sex, be very careful.  Many affairs begin when a person starts sympathizing with someone of the opposite sex.

Jul 01, 2016 10:00 AM
Rainmaker
724,374
Jeff Pearl
RE/MAX Distinctive / LIC in VA - Lovettsville, VA
Full Service Full Time Realtor

I listen, and might ask some questions that could affect the process. Like; is your x still on title or motgage? etc.

Jul 01, 2016 07:34 AM
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Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

With all my heart is how I respond

Jul 01, 2016 07:09 AM
Rainmaker
544,364
Peter Mohylsky, SoWal Is HOME.
Gulf Place @ 30A - Santa Rosa Beach, FL
Let me help you find your path to the beach.

Turn up your listening skills.  It is important to work on those skills.  Alot depends upon the relationship with that client.  It must be close for them to want to share.  

Jul 01, 2016 06:49 AM
Rainmaker
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Ron and Alexandra Seigel
Napa Consultants - Carpinteria, CA
Luxury Real Estate Branding, Marketing & Strategy

Debbie,

I just listen and I don't comment, ever, except to acknowledge that I heard what they said.  A

Jul 01, 2016 06:44 AM
Rainmaker
259,328
Allie Angeloni
Long Realty - Oro Valley, AZ

I don't hear alot of personal problems, though do listen, and sometimes that is all that is required.  I've never been asked my opinion nor for help, and have not offered anything, except 'an ear' Debbie Reynolds.  I will read replies below! 

Jul 01, 2016 06:31 AM
Rainmaker
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Sam Shueh
(408) 425-1601 - San Jose, CA
mba, cdpe, reopro, pe

I am not someone's Goodwrench.  

The psychiatrist I know is very good. $200 a visit.  A realtor will charge more.

 

 

Jul 01, 2016 06:15 AM
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Joe Pryor
The Virtual Real Estate Team - Oklahoma City, OK
REALTOR® - Oklahoma Investment Properties

I do the Peewee Herman with my fingers in my ears going LaLaLaLaLa......

Jul 01, 2016 04:49 AM
Rainmaker
4,796,309
Gabe Sanders
Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales - Stuart, FL
Stuart Florida Real Estate

I try to stay out of any conversation like this as best as I can.

Jul 01, 2016 04:44 AM
Rainmaker
3,048,838
Tony and Suzanne Marriott, Associate Brokers
BVO Luxury Group @ Keller Williams Arizona Realty - Scottsdale, AZ
Serving Scottsdale, Phoenix and Maricopa County AZ

Like this Debbie Reynolds :

Jul 01, 2016 10:53 PM
Rainmaker
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Jennifer Mackay
Counts Real Estate Group, Inc. - Panama City, FL
Your Bay County Florida Realtor 850.774.6582

I listen and keep focus on the task at hand

Jul 01, 2016 10:07 PM
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Kathleen Luiten
Resort and Second-Home Specialist - Princeville, HI
Kauai Luxury Ocean Home Sales

I let them vent a little and direct our focus back to business.

Jul 01, 2016 07:28 PM
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Inna Ivchenko
Barcode Properties - Encino, CA
Realtor® • Green • GRI • HAFA • PSC Calabasas CA

I listen and do not comment. After we are done, I do not judge and never mention it again unless they bring up again. Since I'm a listener, people usually open up to me.

Jul 01, 2016 04:36 PM
Rainmaker
1,204,273
Ryan Huggins - Thousand Oaks, CA
www.HugginsHomes.com - Thousand Oaks, CA
Residential Real Estate and Investment Properties

Try to bring the subject back to real estate.  "I appreciate your issues, however I am not qualified to give advice on that topic."

Jul 01, 2016 09:02 AM
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Ginger Harper
Coldwell Banker Sea Coast Advantage - Southport, NC
Your Southport~Oak Island Agent~Brunswick County!

I listen ..

Jul 01, 2016 08:21 AM
Rainmaker
718,881
Olga Simoncelli
Veritas Prime, LLC dba Veritas Prime Real Estate - New Fairfield, CT
CONSULTANT, Real Estate Services & Risk Management

Listen in a "non-committant" way until the opportunity to change the subject arises.

Jul 01, 2016 06:06 AM
Rainmaker
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Wayne Martin
Wayne M Martin - Chicago, IL
Real Estate Broker - Retired

Not a comfortable situation! In one ear and out the other!

Jul 01, 2016 10:29 PM
Rainmaker
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Gita Bantwal
RE/MAX Centre Realtors - Warwick, PA
REALTOR,ABR,CRS,SRES,GRI - Bucks County & Philadel

Listen. 

Jul 01, 2016 08:57 PM
Rainmaker
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Lawrence "Larry" & Sheila Agranoff. Cell: 631-805-4400
The Top Team @ Charles Rutenberg Realty 255 Executive Dr, Plainview NY 11803 - Plainview, NY
Long Island Home and Condo Specialists

Doesn't happen. We don't drive around with our clients in our car, and try to avoid stopping for food breaks...

Jul 01, 2016 06:00 PM
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Praful Thakkar
LAER Realty Partners - Andover, MA
Andover, MA: Andover Luxury Homes For Sale

Debbie Reynolds - working by referral has taught me to learn more about clients. However, not to interfere with their life. So when things go negative, I switch the  topic - indirectly showing that I am not interested in it.

Or simply would say - it's life, things happen. Next?

Jul 01, 2016 04:14 PM
Rainmaker
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Larry Johnston
Broker, Friends & Neighbors Real Estate and Elkhart County Subdivisions, LLC - Elkhart, IN
Broker,Friends & Neighbors Real Estate, Elkhart,IN

That's when it time to get back on track about houses and their goals.

Jul 01, 2016 02:49 PM
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Debbie Laity
Cedaredge Land Company - Cedaredge, CO
Your Real Estate Resource for Delta County, CO

Oh boy this just came up today. Although I know this person outside of the real estate world, so I listened. 

Jul 01, 2016 01:35 PM
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Patricia Kennedy
RLAH Real Estate - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

I listen.

Jul 01, 2016 12:53 PM
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Debbie Reynolds
Platinum Properties - Clarksville, TN
Your Dedicated Clarksville TN Real Estate Agent

Thanks for all the suggestions. I found myself listening and thinking how is this going to affect the transaction.

Jul 01, 2016 12:43 PM
Rainmaker
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Evelyn Johnston
Friends & Neighbors Real Estate - Elkhart, IN
The People You Know, Like and Trust!

I tell them that is out of my realm of work. I am a Real Estate Councelor, not a marriage counselor, and I laugh, so do they...

Jul 01, 2016 12:33 PM
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Noah Seidenberg
Coldwell Banker - Evanston, IL
Chicagoland and Suburbs (800) 858-7917

If they want to talk I will listen but I never ask any questions around clients. 

Jul 01, 2016 12:23 PM
Rainmaker
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Dorie Dillard CRS GRI ABR
Coldwell Banker United Realtors® ~ 512.750.6899 - Austin, TX
Serving Buyers & Sellers in NW Austin Real Estate

Remain neutral, let them talk and get them back on track.

Jul 01, 2016 12:19 PM
Rainmaker
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Kathleen Daniels
KD Realty - 408.972.1822 - San Jose, CA
San Jose Homes for Sale-Probate & Trust Specialist

I just listen.  That's all I can do. It's truly amazing what I know about clients. It's confidential of course.  I will often pray for them ... yet this is done privately. 

Jul 01, 2016 11:54 AM
Rainmaker
4,827,428
Barbara Todaro
RE/MAX Executive Realty - Franklin, MA
Marketing Agent for The Todaro Team

I'd end the topic with I'm sure it will all work out for the best....and leave....

Jul 01, 2016 05:51 AM
Rainmaker
1,494,986
Lyn Sims
RE/MAX Suburban - Schaumburg, IL
Schaumburg IL Real Estate

Hope something comes up to get you off the topic lol.

I'm with Wanda, head for the bathroom window & don't look back.

Jul 01, 2016 05:39 AM
Rainmaker
1,026,812
Susan Haughton
Long and Foster REALTORS (703) 470-4545 - Alexandria, VA
Susan & Mindy Team...Honesty. Integrity. Results.

I just make the appropriate non committal noises...you sound frustrated or whatever the appropriate comment is.  Let them talk, within reason, make another non committal comment and then look at your watch.  Oh, my goodness, I have another appointment. 

Jul 01, 2016 04:45 AM
Ambassador
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Jeff Dowler, CRS
Solutions Real Estate - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

I would try to change the subject and say as little as possible. That would be tough. Problem is that stuff could complicate the transaction

Jul 01, 2016 04:31 AM
Rainmaker
736,551
Annette Lawrence , Palm Harbor, FL 727-420-4041
ReMax Realtec Group - Palm Harbor, FL
Making FLORIDA Real Estate EZ

I listen.

Don't take sides.

Reveal their challenge is not unique. Marriage ending speed bumps occur at 2 years, 5 years 12 years, 18 years and 25 years. Seriously, by knowing where they are on the time-line you can know what their problem is. What is unknown is their willingness to save it.

Ask what the 'greater purpose' of the marriage is. That 'Greater Purpose' that bond them together in matrimony. It is the greater purpose that strengthens the couple to overcome the absolutely predictable challenges.

Teach them what 'judgement' words and statements are and instruct to banish them from their conversation.

From there they can figure it out.

Jul 01, 2016 04:31 AM
Rainmaker
393,981
Katina Hargrove 352-551-0308
Stake Your Land Realty, Inc. - Eustis, FL
Broker/Owner, GRI,SFR, REALTOR®

Professionally

Jul 06, 2016 09:13 PM
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Tammy Lankford,
Lane Realty Eatonton, GA Lake Sinclair, Milledgeville, 706-485-9668 - Eatonton, GA
Broker GA Lake Sinclair/Eatonton/Milledgeville

Generally with understanding and sympathy

Jul 02, 2016 02:01 PM
Rainmaker
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Will Hamm
Hamm Homes - Aurora, CO
"Where There's a Will, There's a Way!"

In one ear and out the other, or shake my head.

Jul 02, 2016 01:24 AM
Rainmaker
845,955
Marco Giancola
Beachfront Realty - Miami Beach, FL
Realtor (305)608-1922, Miami Beach Florida

I just listen usually and act I understand.

Jul 02, 2016 01:00 AM
Rainmaker
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Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Los Angeles Pasadena 818.516.4393

I listen while making sure our conversation remains about their goals in real estate.

Jul 02, 2016 12:49 AM
Rainmaker
1,511,408
Sandy Padula and Norm Padula, JD, GRI
HomeSmart Realty West & Geneva Financial, Llc. - Carlsbad, CA
Presence, Persistence & Perseverance

Just tell them "I feel their pain" and try to keep them focused on the red bouncing ball.

Jul 01, 2016 11:46 PM
Rainmaker
5,215,146
Roy Kelley
Realty Group Referrals - Gaithersburg, MD

Lend a kind ear but do not take sides.

Jul 01, 2016 11:12 PM