A wonderful friend of mine sent me this in an email - author is unknown
However, most of us will appreciate the humor:
THE HORMONE HOSTAGE THE HORMONE HOSTAGE KNOWS THAT THERE ARE DAYS IN THE MONTH WHEN ALL A MAN HAS TO DO IS OPEN HIS MOUTH & HE TAKES HIS LIFE INTO HIS OWN HANDS! THIS IS A HANDY GUIDE THAT SHOULD BE AS COMMON AS A DRIVER'S LICENSE IN THE WALLET OF EVERY HUSBAND, BOYFRIEND, CO-WORKER, OR SIGNIFICANT OTHER! DANGEROUS: | SAFER: | SAFEST: | ULTRA SAFE: | WHAT'S FOR DINNER? | CAN I HELP YOU WITH DINNER? | WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO FOR DINNER? | HERE, HAVE SOME WINE. | ARE YOU WEARING THAT? | WOW, YOU SURE LOOK GOOD IN BROWN! | WOW! LOOK AT YOU! | HERE, HAVE SOME WINE. | WHAT ARE YOU SO WORKED UP ABOUT? | COULD WE BE OVERREACTING? | HERE'S MY PAYCHECK. | HERE, HAVE SOME WINE. | SHOULD YOU BE EATING THAT? | YOU KNOW, THERE ARE A LOT OF APPLES LEFT. | CAN I GET YOU A PIECE OF CHOCOLATE WITH THAT? | HERE, HAVE SOME WINE. | WHAT DID YOU DO ALL DAY? | I HOPE YOU DIDN'T OVER-DO IT TODAY. | I'VE ALWAYS LOVED YOU IN THAT ROBE! | HERE, HAVE SOME MORE WINE. | 12 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR: 1. PASS MY SHOTGUN 2. PSYCHOTIC MOOD SWING 3. PERPETUAL MUNCHING SPREE 4. PUFFY MID-SECTION 5. PEOPLE MAKE me SICK 6. PROVIDE ME with SWEETS 7. PARDON MY SOBBING 8. PIMPLES MAY SURFACE 9. PASS MY SWEATS 10. PI$$Y MOOD SYNDROME 11. PACK MY STUFF &&& MY FAVORITE ONE 12. POTENTIAL MURDER SUSPECT PASS THIS ON TO ALL OF YOUR HORMONAL FRIENDS & THOSE WHO MIGHT NEED A GOOD LAUGH!! ...OR MEN WHO MAY NEED WARNING!! &&& REMEMBER: MONEY TALKS..... BUT CHOCOLATE ROCKS!! | |
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