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The Harridan Papers

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Maybe you know who I am talking about. If you don't, consider yourself lucky. Look at the reptilian face of Governor Jan Brewer and you'll figure it out. I'm talking about the woman that will shoot you a disapproving stare while her spectacles rest about halfway down her nose. She's the gatekeeper. If you even think you are going to get in to see the Mr. Big, you can forget it. The harridan is sitting behind her desk in a white sweater that smells like moth balls and your chances of getting an appointment to peddle your wares or pitch your idea are somewhere between impossible and no chance. That's right. If you do have an appointment, find a comfortable chair Sonny because you are going to be cooling your heels for a while.

The harridan doesn't always work as a secretary. No, that's just one example. More often than not, the harridan has ascended the corporate ladder and left several sets of broken bones in her wake. Her tactics and moves would make Sun Tzu and Machiavelli proud. She may be one of several vice presidents in a corporation. She didn't attain that position by being overly intelligent. Now don't get me wrong, she's as smart as the next guy. But brilliant would not be a word I would use to describe this woman. Her promotion was achieved by crushing the cajones of her male peers. Needless to say, what she did wasn't particularly graceful or pretty. Let's just say that the other men in her office will do everything they can to stay out of her cross hairs. Yes, that's right. All those big strapping executives are scared to death of her. This woman has no compunction about deleting files and using whatever methods she can to screw you if you even think of crossing her.

If you're an attorney, she was probably your first boss. She gave you an assignment that was impossible to do and even more impossible to complete on time. As you tore your hair out trying to finish the assignment, you heard her coming toward your door. The clicking of her high heeled shoes and indefatigable gait was unmistakable. Her breathing was getting progressively louder outside your closed door. You closed your eyes and prayed that she would disappear into thin air. Inevitably, she would bang on the door four times rousting you out of that fine Corinthian leather chair you know you didn't deserve to be sitting in. She would invariably question you about the little project she gave you with a cold blank stare. You would do your best to explain your progress and she would see right through your charade. There would be a less than amused expression plastered across her face and then as quickly as she came in, she would be gone. Her absence was ominous and so was your future with the law firm.

Now don't get me wrong. I'm not sexist. I'm not saying I dislike the harridan. Ok correction, maybe I do. Who is this woman and how did she get like this? One thing I know. She has got to have a short memory. Maybe she forgot at one time she was a lowly associate or management trainee who had no bloody idea what she was doing. Maybe she forgot that one of the firm elders took her under her wing when she was younger and didn't shake her confidence when she made a dumb mistake. All I know is that through hard work, luck and maybe even a little help from her rabbi, she made partner. I'm sure she deserves her title, except she needs to remember she wasn't always the boss. It would behoove her to be a nice because what comes around goes around.

Chris Wechner
CW Health Inc - Waterford, MI

Hi, Chip.  I can relate to your story.  Most of us can; some more than others.  I've learned that this is not jst a female.  This could easily be an insecure, power-hungry guy, too.  Ask me how I know.

I really agree with your last statement...be nice, because if for no other reason...

Was there something that happened recently to prompt this, or was it just simply an epiphany?

May 28, 2010 09:24 AM