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I HATE "I CAN'T"!!!!

By
Mortgage and Lending with Cherry Creek Mortgage Illinois Residential Mortgage License LMB #0005759 Cherry Creek Mortgage NMLS #: 3001 NMLS ID# 158606

Whe, wa, wa.....!  Winers, baby's, thumbsuckers and just a lot of whining.  I can't stand it...but as much as I can't stand whining and complaining....I just hate the phrase....I CAN'T!  I hate it....

This is a difficult market.  I've been a real estate attorney and a mortgage banker for 14 years.  Although I'm still a young buck, I've seen a lot in my 14 years.  We've been influenced by the markets over the 14 years, but this is the first time I ever remember being "tied to the markets".....Having said that, I am experiencing tough moments and moments of success.  But I really think that the true measure of a man/woman is how they handle adversity.  In the book of Proverbs, it says, "you are a weak sort if you can't withstand adversity."  I gotta tell you that we all have days, weeks, months or even years when we're like "how much more can we take."  But that's just life in general....

What really get's my beef is people who always, and I mean, always say.....I can't.  I tell my kids that I never want to hear them say I can't.  They can say, boy dad, this is going to be hard.....or this seems so hard that I don't think that I can do it.  Or dad this is so hard, can you help me?"  I can deal with this....I really can.  Because I can either come up along side of them and help them or encourage them or just kick them in the butt.  But they're my kids.....

At work, I can't stand clients or even worse, people in my industry who talk only about gloom and doom, but their every other catch phrase is I can't.  Those people for some reason are in our industry and just want to suck the life out of those who have life....  Just by talking to healthy people they are the constant DRAIN.  Healthy people and people with a purpose in life avoid them at all costs. 

Im not saying that healthy people shouldn't be and example or take others under their wing, but when I'm at work, I have one gear and that's high gear.  I want to get my stuff done so that I can go and hang with my family, workout or do something fun.  I love mentoring people....but there are certain people who seem to just have inbred in their DNA the genetic makeup of making sure that the world knows just how bad their life is....and they always want to put the "I can't" off on someone else. 

Anyway...I think that I've heard it so much that I CAN'T tell you how much I hate the word's I CANT! 

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Comments(19)

Diane Lombardino
Keller Williams Realty of Jupiter - Palm Beach Gardens, FL
Right On!  Well put!  I say "if you can't, don't", but move on and get out of my way because I CAN!!
Feb 28, 2008 03:07 PM
Tony Grego, 317-663-4173 #1 Trade Association for Alternative Inv
REISA - 317-663-4173 - Indianapolis, IN

The only thing "I can't" do is hang around with people saying that "they can't" all day long. If you work with the market, the market will come to you

Happy Selling

Tony

Feb 28, 2008 03:10 PM
Trey Thurmond
BCR Realtors - College Station, TX
College Station , Texas Homes

Great Post...I know what you mean . It is an absolutely useless statement. I would rather someone say" I won't."  That at least is an honest statement. 

Can't and won't really are more indicative of the BIG "L" (lazy) than anything else.

Feb 28, 2008 03:22 PM
Rich Jacobson Kitsap County WA Real Estate
Windermere Real Estate/West Sound, Inc. - Seabeck, WA
I'd really like to share some really meaningful thoughts here, ....but "I can't!"
Feb 28, 2008 03:23 PM
.... ...
.... - Mauldin, SC
Where there is a will, there is a way :)
Feb 28, 2008 03:32 PM
Greg Nino
RE/MAX Compass - Houston, TX
Houston, Texas

I can't wait to list with you. I can't wait for you to help us buy a home. I can't compete with you, your to good to negotiate with. I can't pay you 6% you deserve much more. I can't believe this is all your  asking, you deserve more. I can't believe It took this long to find such a great agent like yourself.

You can like I can't once in awhile.

Feb 28, 2008 03:32 PM
Dick Betts
TOUCHSTONE REAL ESTATE - The Villages, FL
REALTOR® The Villages, Florida
The power of a positive outlook on life can at least help you have a good day and actually it rubs off.  Everyday I try and even when in a bad mood I turn it on and shortly I can take on the world.
Feb 28, 2008 03:41 PM
Colleen Fischesser Northwest Property Shop
NextHome Experience - Chelan, WA
A Tradition of Trust in the Pacific NW since 1990!

Larry, I couldn't agree more. Whether you think you can or you can't....you're right!

Feb 28, 2008 03:45 PM
Mike Gambino
Prudential Patterson Realtors - Florissant, MO
GRI

Larry,

I couldn't agree more.  In fact the name of my Team is the "We Can" TEAM.  My website is WeCanSellHomes.com   In the military we used to have pins that said "Can Do"  The positive approach breeds success.  If you say I can't then you are 100% correct.

Feb 28, 2008 03:53 PM
Ginger Wilcox
Sindeo - San Francisco, CA

What if I say, " i can't wait to sell that house." or "I can't wait to catch up with you?" :o )  Sorry, somebody has give you a hard time.

I know, work hard or go home. 

Feb 28, 2008 04:03 PM
Judy Greenberg
Compass - Long Grove, IL
Compass- Long Grove -Buffalo Grove

I work very hard also, and sometimes I like to do my work at home because there is a lot of negative attitudes at the office and I don't want ot be part of it.  Consistent Hard work pays off!

Feb 28, 2008 10:01 PM
Sara Homan
Coldwell Banker Ellison Realty 352-209-4044 - Ocala, FL
Realtor, Homes, Farms & 55+

Larry,

Well said!  I was raised in a pretty lax environment and have had to fight for everything I got.  I have been guilty of the"I can't" mentality but have strived to rise above it.  It's an attitude that simply "I Can't" afford!

Feb 28, 2008 11:06 PM
Diane Bell, Hilton Head Real Estate, Bluffton
Charter 1 Real Estate, Hilton Head, Bluffton, SC - Hilton Head Island, SC

Larry,

I had a very wise mother who counseled us to never say "can't."  It has stuck with me all these years.  Enjoyed your post!

Feb 28, 2008 11:10 PM
Larry Bettag
Cherry Creek Mortgage Illinois Residential Mortgage License LMB #0005759 Cherry Creek Mortgage NMLS #: 3001 - Saint Charles, IL
Vice-President of National Production

Diane....way to go....love the enthusiasm.

Tony...right on.

Trey...way to distinguish between the two...both seem to be cousins of each other don't they?

Rich.....think longer...maybe you can.

Jim.....right on....

Greg...those are really good examples....

Feb 29, 2008 12:33 AM
Larry Bettag
Cherry Creek Mortgage Illinois Residential Mortgage License LMB #0005759 Cherry Creek Mortgage NMLS #: 3001 - Saint Charles, IL
Vice-President of National Production

Dick...it is a decision isn't it?

Colleen...you get what you say....you can....then you will...you can't...then don't even try.

Mike.....too cool....you are the example of the opposite in name and in action...love your response.

Ginger....I can't comprehend why you would say that.

Judy...I work with a top 10 realtor in our state.  She hates hanging at the office b/c of all the negative mojo.  surround yourself with great poeple right?

Sara....right on!!!

Diane....thanks D!  It does come from the top down doesn't it?  Mom and dad often times determine much of our makeup.  The pressure comes in that we do that withour children too.

Feb 29, 2008 12:38 AM
Dionne Bass
Ask The Underwriter - Atlanta, GA
Blog: Ask The Underwriter
That was coaching! I've been working at home for the past 4 months so I've only read the negative.  But the few people I've talked to I won't under any circumstances agree with them.  If I do than I'm setting myself up to fail.  Keep 'em coming!
Feb 29, 2008 05:10 AM
Larry Bettag
Cherry Creek Mortgage Illinois Residential Mortgage License LMB #0005759 Cherry Creek Mortgage NMLS #: 3001 - Saint Charles, IL
Vice-President of National Production
D. Bass....thanks for the kudos....always great to hear postive responses....
Feb 29, 2008 01:54 PM
Atlanta's Home Inspector, David Lelak IHI Home Inspections
IHI Home Inspections 404-788-2581 - Canton, GA
Experience the IHI Difference
Larry great post, I have always told my kids I'don't ever want to hear those words come out of their mouths.  And you know what, I have some amazing CAN DO kids.  My son was flying a single engine airplane at 14, the boy wasn't old enough to drive but there he was flying.  I can, my husband can and my kids can  ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!
Feb 29, 2008 03:17 PM
Larry Bettag
Cherry Creek Mortgage Illinois Residential Mortgage License LMB #0005759 Cherry Creek Mortgage NMLS #: 3001 - Saint Charles, IL
Vice-President of National Production
David....great comment brother.....start while their young and they won't stray from what you've taught them.
Mar 02, 2008 02:00 PM