I was embarrassed today...

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with ADT Real Estate

There goes the neighborhood!!!

I was so embarrassed to hear that comment today while showing a house in an affluent neighborhood to some Hispanic clients of mine. I wasn't embarrassed for my clients, I was embarrassed for the people who made that racist remark in front of my clients. I was embarrassed that someone would have the nerve to say that comment, while looking sideways at us, and walk away with their smug looks on their faces. Did they think that because we were speaking Spanish that they wouldn't be understood?

 

I was proud today as well. I was proud of the way my client handled the situation. They just shrugged it off and went about their business, as if it didn't matter. Because it really didn't matter at all. You can't allow the racist remarks that issue forth from rich, ignorant mouths to dissuade you from realizing your dreams in life. I'm sure they won't. Yes, I was very proud of them.

 

I was also dumbfounded today. You see, that comment was made in the presence of a Realtor. Well, two if you include me. The part that dumbfounded me was that the other agent agreed and walked away laughing with them. I was boiling inside to think that a Realtor would be an active part of such a conversation. It's a good thing that I have had time to think about the situation since then.

You see, I could very possibly have made a big mistake by reacting to that situation out of my anger over what I thought had happened. How often do we do that? We see everything through our own individual filters. My filter today caused me to see that conversation in a certain way that made those people out to be bigots. They very well may have been just that, but consider this...

 

The people are having a great time talking with their Realtor about the house they are considering buying. They are joking with one another about the possibility that they might buy the house and the husband mentions that he'll really enjoy having his buddies from the men's group he just joined over for a bar-b-que sometime. His wife says, a bit loudly, "There Goes the Neighborhood!!", which draws a good bit of laughter, even from the Realtor, as they walk away.

Yes, I was embarrassed today...for myself. I've got to get my filter cleaned. How about you?

Comments (23)

Karen Gentry>>Charlottesville, Virginia Real Estate Professional
RE/MAX Excellence-Charlottesville VA - Charlottesville, VA

What a great eye opening post.  I am sure we all "hear or assume" things wrong more than we think.

Jun 02, 2008 10:23 PM
Shaun Wren
AGENTFORLIFE - Lakeland, FL

Control over the tongue. That shows true strength.

Jun 02, 2008 10:40 PM
Chip Jefferson
Gibbs Realty and Auction Company - Columbia, SC

That is enough to make anyone mad. I hope it didn't discourage your buyers. Some people just have no manners.

Jun 02, 2008 10:44 PM
Chris Griffith
Downing-Frye Realty, Bonita Springs, FL - Bonita Springs, FL
Bonita Springs Listing Agent

I litterally wrote a similar story for my local paper that will get published Wednesday.  I guess it caught my eye because it's been on my mind.  

Jun 02, 2008 10:50 PM
Broker Nick
South Florida Real Estate & Development, Inc. - Coconut Creek, FL
Broker Nick Relocation Broker Service

Andrew ~ Very good post about comments made and how people could take things the wrong way. How appropriate to these circumstances we find ourselves in today in the Rain!

Jun 03, 2008 12:54 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Candace,

I had to think about it much more than twice before I got it to. I know I'm much more aware now as well. Thanks for your comment.

Susan,

Wow, that could have been a tough one to deal with. Sounds like it turned out well though.

Brian,

Absolutely. We should all take a bit more time to think these days. I know I will. Thanks for stopping by.

Jun 03, 2008 01:47 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Karen,

Thanks for your comment. Keep those eyes open!!

Shaun,

The tongue is our strongest member, that's for sure. It takes strength to get it under control. Thanks for stopping by.

Laura,

Yes, some people don't see the whole picture at all. Thanks for dropping in.

Jun 03, 2008 01:50 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Chris,

I hope your piece is received well. Some don't like to hear that we need to gain control over our thoughts and reactions. It's on my mind now, for sure.

Nick,

Yes. It's been a bit hyper-sensitive in the Rain lately. We all need to take a step back and see what's really going on these days. Thanks for your comment.

Jun 03, 2008 01:52 AM
Cheri Smith
Prudential Gary Greene, Cypress TX - Cypress, TX
Realtor Prudential Gary Greene

That reminds me of the time when my brother's girlfriend said I looked fat when I had just finished getting all dressed up to go out for the evening.

I just looked at her like a deer in the headlights.

Then she explained that she was saying I looked "PHAT".

Then explained what PHAT was. "Pretty Hot And Tempting" for those of you who don't know.

We had a good laugh over it.

It does go to show you that things aren't always what they seem on the surface.

 

Jun 03, 2008 06:01 AM
Alexander Harb
Knights Investing - Mesquite, TX
Dallas, Texas Real Estate Investing

This is an example of how to behave as a licensed real estate professional.....

As such...this is now a featured post in,"Christianity and real Estate".....

We need to be examples of Jesus everywhere..... 

 

 

 

 

Jun 03, 2008 09:16 AM
Susan Haughton
Long and Foster REALTORS (703) 470-4545 - Alexandria, VA
Susan & Mindy Team...Honesty. Integrity. Results.

Great post - most of us have probably been in situations where we *thought* we heard something we really didn't hear.  This is a good reminder to not always jump to the worst possible conclusion!

Jun 03, 2008 09:59 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Cheri,

That was a PHAT comment, thanks!!

Al,

Thanks for the feature and thanks for stopping by.

Susan,

Yes, it was a great lesson for me. I tend to jump before I think. Thanks for your comment.

Jun 03, 2008 03:54 PM
Sondra Meyer:
Colorado Springs, CO
See It. Experience It. Live It.

Andrew, Congrats on getting selected as a featured post.  As a CPA, I used to investigate allegations of wrong doing.  Your post reminded me about how important it is to get all of the details. I hope that the way the story ended, about wife's comment about partying was truly what happened.  Sounds to real to be ablet o make up. 

While your story had an interesting twist, it is sad that discrimination does still occur from time to time. 

Grace and peace

Jun 03, 2008 04:12 PM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Sondra,

Thanks for the congrats. I hope that was what truly happened as well. I choose to believe that it was, which makes all the difference to me. Without all the facts, it's the only outcome I can rightfully choose.

It is truly sad that discrimination does truly exist and is in full force against the Hispanic community these days.

Grace and peace to you as well.

Jun 03, 2008 04:46 PM
Robert L. Brown
www.mrbrownsellsgr.com - Grand Rapids, MI
Grand Rapids Real Estate Bellabay Realty, West Mic

OOps i had to read it a couple times myself to catch the gist of the conversation. I may have to clean my ears as well.

Jun 04, 2008 02:57 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

Robert,

Or your eyes...LOL Thanks for the comment.

Jun 04, 2008 04:10 AM
James Wexler
wexzilla.com - Scottsdale, AZ

Andrew

I am always careful(and probably not as humorous) as I know two sets of ears can interpret things differently.  It sounds like we can all learn alot from this situation.

by the way, Do you have an outside blog that I can add to my Blogroll ?

Thanks and look forward to reading your thoughts on the world of real estate.

Jun 19, 2008 05:37 PM
Chastity Guevara
Camelot's Quest Realty - Casa Grande, AZ

Hi Andrew,

I think many people would have assumed the worst with that comment.  I don't think I would have ever have come up with that alternative story.  Great post.

Chastity

Oct 04, 2008 05:22 PM
Angelia Garcia
Pure Realtors - Dallas, TX

So far the only comments I have received from my buyers are that they don't want to live in a certain area where certain people live.  It goes in one ear and out the other.  I still send them homes that match their criteria regardless of the neighborhood.  I tell them to drive the neighborhood and tell me which ones they want to view.

Oct 05, 2008 07:30 AM
Andrew Trevino
ADT Real Estate - Wilkes Barre, PA
Wilkes-Barre Homes For Sale

I always wondered if I would see the day that I would be forced to decide between deleting a comment or letting it stand. I guess that day has arrived.

I really don't see the relevance to my post in the comment by seattle broker and I certainly don't think that I agree with the statements made in this comment, so I am deleting the comment.

Mar 29, 2010 10:30 AM