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So, You're Parents Are Selling the House You Grew Up In ....

Reblogger Peter Pfann @ eXp Realty Pfanntastic Properties in Victoria, Since 1986.
Real Estate Sales Representative with eXp Realty, Victoria BC www.pfanntastic.com

Boomers and Seniors, Greater Victoria Real Estate Moving Downsizing

Today we found yet another Pfanntastic Blog, that we think is very helpfull for some of our readers

and we would like to thank Karen Bernetti for creating a very sensible and informative article about  parents selling the "Family Home" and everything that comes this potentially emotinal roller coaster.

Peter and Linda Pfann specialize in working with the elderly and we have a number of books and resources available for use by our clients that may further assist in you and considering your next steps.

One fo the books we often refer to is called very appropriately

"Who Gets Grandma's Yellow Pie Plate" by the University of Minnesota

Thanks again Karen, and we hope you enjoy this great information.

Original content by Karen Bernetti

So, your parents are getting ready to sell the house you grew up in.  If you're like many adult children, you might not be happy with their decision.  Even though you don't live there any more, you're probably attached to that house and all the memories it contains. The thoughts of someone else living there could be absolutely unbearable to you.  senior couple

While it's not uncommon for adult children to be sad to see their parents sell the family house - try not interfere with their decisionThe house could be getting too difficult or too expensive for them to maintain.  And depending on their health, the house might not even be safe for one or both of them any more. Sure you might be willing and able to help them take care of it - but they might be too proud to ask.    

Parents [typically] make a lot of sacrifices for their children and at some point that has to stop.  Parents should not be forced to stay in a house that longer serves them just to appease their adult children. 

No doubt, making the decision to sell was very difficult, and they're probably emotional about it too.  You parents need to do what is best for THEM.  They need your support and maybe even your assistance.  Try to put your own feelings aside and help them.  Talk to them about their decision.  If they're excited about their move, try to get on board with those feelings (even if it means pretending at first). 

For seniors who have lived in the same house for a number of years, the process of sorting through years of accumulated stuff can be very overwhelming.  There are lots of things you can do to help your parents, here are just a few: 

1.  Round up your siblings and get rid of all the stuff your parents have been storing for you in their attic or basement.  They have enough of their own stuff to sort through right now, they shouldn't have to decide what to do with your old clothes, toys, comic books, baseball card collections and/or college text books. 

2.  Offer to help them but let them stay in control of the process.  Allow them to go at their own pace.

3.  If you're worried that your parents will get rid of some things that are precious to you, talk to them openly about it. Be sure not to ask for something unless you're certain they're ready to part with it. 

4.  Parents often start giving things away that their children might not want.  While you shouldn't be forced to keep something you don't want, do try to be as tactful as possible about it. Emotions run high during times like these and feelings could very easily be hurt. 

5.  If you can't help out because you live too far away or if your work and/or family obligations are too excessive, offer to research professionals in your area who may be able to assist them.  Look for professional organizers, move managers and stagers that specialize in helping seniors with their downsize moves. 

Even if you are close enough and are not too busy to help, you might still want to seek out the assistance of a professional.  An unbiased, unemotional third party might be just what your family needs right now!

Perhaps you feel your parents are making bad decisions about the sale of their house or are being irresponsible.  Share your concerns with a trusted family member, friend or attorney.  Remember that in the end it's ultimately up to your parents to decide what's best for them - even if that means they're spending your inheritance.

Related posts:

Staging4Smooth Transitions - Solutions for Seniors Stuck in Houses They Can't Sell

So You're Thinking About Downsizing

 

 

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Karen Bernetti is a Real Estate Stager, Former Realtor®, Author, Speaker, and Owner of Staging4Smooth Transitions - specializing in assisting seniors with their downsize moves.  

Karen is also the Co-creator of the Ready2Sellin30Days® System - an innovative, interactive, multi-media educational program designed to teach do-it-yourself homeowners EVERYTHING they need to know about preparing a home for sale during tough economic times.  Visit www.Ready2Sellin30Days.com to learn more. 

Stay up to date on all the latest real estate staging and home decor trends with The Home Sale Success with Karen & Ann BlogSign up here to receive The Home Sale Success with Karen & Ann Newsletter!

Karen Bernetti is also the "Resident Stager" at North Star Real Estate, in Southington Connecticut, where every listing comes with a complimentary Home Staging consultation.  Call 860-302-0333 for more information.

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Peter Pfann,

CPCA, ABR, SRES, E-Pro, IMSD, Master ASA, C-CREC, Associate Broker.

Text or Talk To Peter @: (1) 250 - 213 - 9490  

peterpfann@gmail.com  www.pfanntastic.com

Pfanntastic Properties in Victoria, BC, Canada, @ Fair  Realty Since 1986.

Regional office: 1540 Fort St Victoria, BC V8S 5J2

 

Jason McDowell
Maryville, MO

There are some very good tips in there. While we moved around and didn't really settle on a "family home" when I was growing up, lots of people did. Good Read!

Apr 26, 2011 07:51 AM
Peter Pfann @ eXp Realty Pfanntastic Properties in Victoria, Since 1986.
eXp Realty, Victoria BC www.pfanntastic.com - Victoria, BC
Talk To or Text Peter 250-213-9490

Hi Jason, thank you for visiting and feedback, Karen created a great bit of information, please be sure to let her know on her original post how much you liked it.

 

Apr 26, 2011 07:54 AM
Karen Bernetti
Southington, CT

Thanks for the re-blog - I'm so glad you found my post helpful!

Apr 26, 2011 03:10 PM
Peter Pfann @ eXp Realty Pfanntastic Properties in Victoria, Since 1986.
eXp Realty, Victoria BC www.pfanntastic.com - Victoria, BC
Talk To or Text Peter 250-213-9490

Hi Karen,

Your post related to a relatively common situation here in the Canadian retirement capital....as such it is very much appreciated...

 

Apr 26, 2011 03:44 PM