Everyone including Notaries: Beware of catching “OPP”

Everyone including Notaries: Beware of catching “OPP”

Recent reports on this and other notary “gathering places” indicate a dramatic increase in the spread of OPP. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (or CDC) has researched this phenomenon; and reported truly starting virulence. To their astonishment this affliction can be spread by personal contact, regular “snail mail” and, most amazingly by email or telephone!

Few are immune to the growing pandemic. Antibiotics have no effect, either for prevention or cure of this horrific affliction.  There have been isolated reports of immunity; giving the CDC a faint hope for stopping the disease’s rapid advance. Oddly, the few resistant individuals have always been diagnosed with other afflictions (predominately mental); leading to the conclusion that OPP only affects otherwise healthy individuals. Statistics show the disease to be gender neutral, equally infecting males and females.

The symptoms are debilitating. Once contracted victims have been known to experience severe anxiety, loss of higher cognitive functions, cold sweats; and ultimately a desire to withdraw from contact with society. While being primarily an affliction of the cerebellum, several physical side effects characterize OPP’s tragic destructive onslaught. Among the more common psychic aspects are loss of self esteem and uncertainty as to how to function; often leading to a complete mental shut down.

Other physical manifestations generally include: sleeplessness, severe headaches, development of “nervous twitches”, bedwetting and uncontrollable crying. Psychiatric care is generally advised to mitigate the physical symptoms; however, the mental aspects of OPP have proven much more difficult to curtail.

Based upon all available scientific research, and empirical data; the CDC has cautioned notaries public to take any and all steps to avoid contraction. Key to avoiding the tragedy of OPP is understanding the nature of the problem – which, fortunately, is contained in the nomenclature used to categorize and differentiate OPP from other “self induced” psychosis. OPP, once understood is avoidable; you can only contract it if you want to. Thus it’s easy for individuals to become resilient and remain OPP free; if only they take the time to understand and decipher the acronym.

Here is your cure, here is your salvation; here is the key to remaining OPP free forever. You only have to decipher the anagram (scrambled letters) of the three words below which define this heartbreaking malady. Once you decipher the “unmentionable” words below; all you have to do is make the mental decision to avoid OPP, that’s all it takes; and you can be OPP free forever.

HRTOE     OLPSEPE      LBROEMPS

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