From my Meme'd to yours & my Google Spoofing Secret

Ok here are my 5 things that you probably don't know about me:

1. I love to manipulate google for people searching for Frank LLosa click on any of the first 3 links. I reroute everyone looking for me to a man in prison holding my name. I've had this for about 6 years and it has served me well.  Reporters that see my quotes in places like Wall Street Journal, they google me. Ultimately they hit this page and when they call I say "how did you find me." 95% hit that page! They laugh. I laugh. Laughing is funny.
   
2. I was born in Caracas to Cuban parents and I have been to 32 countries.
3. Formerly a professional photographer with photos in 3 National Geographic publications.
4. I have a phobia of pickles. I have to tell the waiter 3 times to make sure not to slip one on my plate. If they do...