The book, How to Win Friends & Influence People*, consistently makes the top five whenever there is a survey of most influential or inspiring books, and is often second only to theBible. Dale Carnegie outlines - in very simple steps and examples - how to be nice without letting yourself get walked on.The section titled, Six Ways to Make People Like You, reveals six traits kind people of the world share:
Become interested in other people. Note that he doesn't say “show interest,” but rather "become interested” - change yourself for real, rather than practicing handy habits. Especially in business, it's critical that we learn to see prospects as people rather than as sales.
Smile. There's probably nothing so positive and contagious as a simple smile. If you have trouble smiling sincerely, get your mind out of the dumps and think about something that will make you smile.
Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language. If you are not a pro at remembering people's names, become one. If your mind is dividing people into “important” and “not as important”, remembering only those names you value, you're at an enormous disadvantage - in addition to being a snob.
Be a good listener and encourage people to talk about themselves. Most folks don't need much encouragement, but those who do will likely thank you for such a great conversation.
Talk in terms of the other person's interests. Reignite your childhood curiosity, and ask questions! When possible, learn in advance what their interests are and spend a few minutes each day researching those topics so you have something to discuss the next time you chat.
Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely. Notice the talents and abilities of others. Show gratitude to the grocer for not smashing your bread. Admire the speed of the clerk at the DMV. If you can't find something complimentary about another person, you're not looking hard enough.
I hope Carnegie's tips serve as a reminder for how you can make the world a better place.
*How to Win Friends and Influence People, by Dale Carnegie, ©1936, Simon & Schuster, Inc.
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